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What a tragic story, that poor little girl and her parents lives ruined. In this country we seem to place little value on the lives of young children. We know someone who killed a 4 month old baby by throwing a party where the parents and their friends were drunk and drugged, they took the baby to bed with them and killed her by rolling on her in their drunken, drugged state.
" no further action to be taken at this time " was what the CPS said, what about that little baby ? Where is the justice for her.
No justice at all Anita, in my opinion. Very sad indeed.
You can say that again Geoff ! Not that I see them often, well I've never seen her, but I can't bring myself to even look at him, in my opinion It's a waste of good air to keep him breathing.
How tragic, poor parents.!(((Hugs)))
My husband's cousin had such a tragedy. She was driving home from church in the early 1980's when seat belts and child safety seat regulations were not the same as now. Her husband was holding their new baby and their little girl was sitting in the back. A van ploughed into them, the baby died crushed by the husband and the little girl flew through the car. She had very badly damaged legs and has had several operations. His cousin was unconscious a long while and missed the funeral of her baby daughter. Both parents had severe mental issues following the crash and despite later having twin sons, the depression was so great for her husband he eventually committed suicide. He sat in the car in his garage with the engine running. You couldn't imagine such misery from one stupid driver. Closer still more recently we had Shannon killed on her moped. None of the punishments are anywhere near severe enough.
That's so very sad Lynne, how anyone would be able to get over that is hard to imagine.
We bought a car seat for our daughter's baby then bought another for him for our car. I won't take chances like that.The awful thing was we gave our seat to his cousin after our daughter grew out of it but as she was in her fathers car they didn't get it fixed in. In those days they had to be screwed in not mounted in the seat belts like today.
M T wrote: "Mum in hospital with a suspected stroke. Need to sort out care for them. 24 hour so if something goes tits up I don't have to drop everything and fly down there about once a month the way I do now...."(((HUGS))) MT, hope you are able to get the care in place soon.
Things are looking a lot better, I have a great deal to do but at least I have some ideas as to where I should start from.Hugs to everyone else who needs them, if I go over the page my post will disappear.
Cheers
MTM
Glad things are looking better MT
Pleased to hear you are making progress Mary (((HuG)))
Mum was a lot frailer today but she is in a really cheery ward with good folks who have lots of family visiting so it's nice but quite noisy which may be a challenge. Yesterday was awesome, we had mum and daughter time. I was there for 2 hours and it just flew. Today she didn't wave us off and couldn't stand up and said she felt much weaker. Her sight isn't good either. I think the high blood pressure may have made her glaucoma worse. On the upside, I have five ladies who are willing to sleep over there and sleep with my dad (so to speak - there have been lots of jokes about him putting it about). So there is a secure environment for her to go home to.Up sides, I feel much closer to my Dad, he has no short term memory but otherwise is not so bad. It was good to spend time with him. I'd slightly put up barriers because it hurts to see him the way he is. I think maybe I'm a bit more open to connecting with Dad more now - which is good because I will regret it later on - and also I guess that made me a bit more optimistic about the state of Mum.
Downsides, Mum, not good. Not as bad as Dad yet but she's sunk a huge distance in a few months whereas Dad's taken years... and the first bit is always heartbreaking, it gets easier as you acclimatise to it.
Oh Mary, my thoughts are with you. Its a difficult time for all of you.
Yeh. It's pants. I was crying in the car on the way home. Trying to do it so that McMini wouldn't realise because he is a sweetie and it would traumatise him. But we'll get through.
M T wrote: "Mum was a lot frailer today but she is in a really cheery ward with good folks who have lots of family visiting so it's nice but quite noisy which may be a challenge. Yesterday was awesome, we had ..."I lost my dad a couple of years ago - treasure every minute you have with him. Remember, he was a different person as a baby, a child, a teen, a young man... We all change.
I understand completely the comments about putting up barriers, it does hurt to see parents failing. You'll only regret things you don't do now, not what you do. The closer you are the harder it is to let go but ultimately if you know you've made a difference and given care and love when it's needed you will find it easier afterwards. It's very difficult when you're so far from your own family too. I used to have to fight the urge to rush back home again when I was in your situation, especially nighttimes. Stay strong, drive safely, that might sound daft but it's meant well.
One thing that I would say, which links in a bit with what Alicia said, is that whilst you might lose him, once he's gone you get your Dad back. It's difficult to explain but I found that a couple of years after, when I thought of my Dad, the picture that came to mind was the man in his fifties almost at the peak of his life, rather than the old man at the end of it.I know it's a poor consolation, but it's there :-(
Alicia, yes, you're right. Lynne, yes, I will ;-)
Jim, yeh, I kind of cling to that... in some ways I already do especially with Mum who's just going into it.
Thanks.
MTM
Such a difficult time for you Mary, glad there are some positives though
Jim is right Mary, it's not just about now but about all the happy years of love and they far out shine how your parents are today.
Can only repeat what has been said before, love and your happy memories will get you through the tough times and hopefully with all the care and support you have put in place and are providing yourself (with McMini's help) there will still be many happy times ahead for you all.
Thanks... she has had a carpal tunnel flare up in her hand which explains yesterday, when she wasn't too good. I'm hoping she will be OK at home for a while but I am going to have to get them into a nursing home at some point very soon. Cheers
MTM
Will you be able to find a nursing home near you. As my Dad didn't have any strong ties to his home town my sister and I both looked for places near our homes. As it happened he moved to one near me as the home was the best we saw. It made life a lot easier for me and when my sister saw him she stayed with me so we kept in close contact. Once in a nursing home people seldom go out, unless they have a very good group of friends or a lot of relatives it really could be anywhere.
Thanks all... Mum has had a mini stroke, it's official, and is coming out today. My brother is picking her up but this is what I'm up against.The ward rang today and asked about transport. I rang them back and explained it was my brother and I asked what happened. They said, mini stroke but that she was on a better anti coagulant now, apixoban.
So, that's the one I tried to get her onto a year ago but she can't use it because she has heart valve problems. So I had to explain that to the nurse who said, 'really? Are you sure?' and then checked with a colleague, and said, 'gosh, yes, I see, well it looks as if she'll be back on the wharafarin then.' She said they would get in touch with the doctor and call back. I don't know how medical notes work but you'd have thought they would have some kind of 'sticky' post at the top containing the important things anyone treating the person will need to know, for example nut allergy, or any conditions that rule out certain drugs, because the patient can't always say.
The reason the NHS heamorrages money is because it's all dots and no fucker ever joins them up. If I hadn't asked, just as an after thought at the end, it would never have come up and Mum would have been on the wrong drugs that might have made her ill in a whole new and different way.
I'm reasonably articulate and switched on. But not everyone is. And what do they do?
Cheers
MTM
Oh, so familiar. My mum had an artificial valve and couldn't take warfarin. She took nycumalone - or some variant of the spelling! Whenever she was in hospital they would take her off the anticoagulant and when she was discharged, they'd give her warfarin, through the hospital pharmacy. Every bloody time! Before we collected her we had to cross-question the ward staff and wait for the correct drug. If she'd had nobody looking out for her she wouldn't have made it.
It never seems to be anybody's job to do this sort of checking :-(
My practice changed me from Zantac to Ranitidine, I then had lots of indigestion problems, when I discussed this with my pharmacist he confirmed my fears that cheaper version were enteric coated and ineffective as my problems were upper gastro-intestinal. I phoned GP and got him to change prescription but you'd think they would know this. I also had respiratory failure as a side effect from blood pressure drug, changed to a different type and find it suits very well but every year when I attend for my review with the nurse she tries to change me back to the other type. GRRRR!Glad to hear your mum is being discharged Mary, hope she gets her medication sorted out.
It really is appalling that such mistakes can be made so easily Mary, I hope they get it sorted out very soon.
Philip (sarah) wrote: "My practice changed me from Zantac to Ranitidine, I then had lots of indigestion problems, when I discussed this with my pharmacist he confirmed my fears that cheaper version were enteric coated an..."You can't take your eyes off of the 'professionals' - that is a disgrace, because they would admit no responsibility if they sent you on your way with the wrong thing and you took it.
It helps to have someone else along, someone who is not as emotionally involved and is not sick or in pain - just to listen. If you can.
I've just had word that my younger brother has had a mild heart attack and is in hospital.
Oh Patti, big hugs to you and your family xx
Sorry to hear that Patti, I hope he makes a quick recovery.
So sorry Patti, hope he recovers real soon.
So sorry to hear that Patti, have a ((((HUG)))) I hope he will soon be feeling much better. Lots of love X X
Give him the GR love-hug, Patti. That'll work wonders. x
I'm sorry to hear that too, Patti. I hope he gets better soon.
AW Patti, that's a real shame. So sorry to hear about the heart attack. Add my hug into the long queue you are receiving, Dear.
Fingers crossed for him Patti
Sorry to hear that, Patti. Hope he gets better soon.
Hope he makes a quick recovery Patti. Pass on our best wishes.
Patti sorry to hear about your brother ,here's another(( hug ))Hope he recovers quickly.
Have a hug Patti and all our best wishes for a speedy recovery
Patti, so sorry to hear about your brother. Modern medicine can do a lot - my husband had one 17 years ago, and is doing fine.
People with that kind of disregard for others lives shouldn't be allowed to drive, ever.
Hugs Geoff, I think I'm a little broken now too.