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General Fiction > Enchanted (explicit be warned)

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message 1: by Michael (new)

Michael Benavidez so this was just a short something I did to exercise my details and then tada, not too proud on the content but I think I did good far as the "story" goes.
again this is explicit in a sexual nature and probably morally fucked up, (not it's explicit for the language, I'm sorry) also, I do not commend violence, most of all violence against women, it is sick it is low and wrong. But I have seen too much TOO much in this world to not have it influence me in adding it to my writing, I'm sorry for anyone I may offend. slightly based on true events. very slightly, very. and here is the story


Despite the tension in the air, swelling up with emotions not even Freudian logic could explain, Aaron Carver knew she was beautiful from the moment his eyes spied her and that fact would not leave him until his death.
She had appeared from the corner of his eyes, and would probably have gone unnoticed for the next five minutes, those next five minutes being the longest five minutes of anyone’s life, had his best friend not spoken up. “Will you look at that nice piece of ass.” He said, having a limited vocabulary when it came to women, hitting Aaron with the end of his elbow to grab his attention. “Must be my birthday ‘cause she’s running straight for me…”
His words trailed off but were quickly picked up by another man who noticed her, “What the fuck,” he said aloud although by the look on his face it was meant to have stayed in his head. Yet that sentence was mimicked by everybody that saw, and Aaron was pretty sure they were all glad that this stranger voiced it all for them.
They had been walking across Elm Ave, traffic close to minimal since it was still quite early in the morning, even if the sidewalks made up for that. Their destinations were all forgotten, as each of them turned to see what was drawing everyone’s attention, including Aaron’s.
She was beautiful, no one could deny that, and if they did they only did so to try and shove the memory away from their minds. Aaron turned to see, and time slowed so he could gather each and every detail deep into his psyche.
Her hair was a light brown with thick clumps of red strung within the strands, causing her hair to glow a soft red fire from under the light of the rising sun, flowing across her face with a grace that one would see in statues of Greek times. Glasses were fixed loosely on the edge of her nose, giving enough of a view to reveal soft green eyes that glistened against the gentle skin of her moist face. Her lips were paused in an o-shape, a ruby rose red painted along the slender curves, accenting the feminine lining of her cheeks. Beauty all within her face, Aaron watched with a horror that mended itself onto sudden ache of love within his chest.
Aaron Carver had never met her before, he would have recognized such beauty the instant he saw her, but already a growing need for hold her, to know her, expanded from his heart to the entirety of his chest. Even as the ghastly horror of what she wore implanted itself into his vision.
She wore a normal white shirt, a simple button up with its sleeves cutting off at the wrist, though it fit her two sizes too big and a dried red stained the fabric. That’s all she wore. Only one button tied the shirt together, meeting just below the slender belly to hide the greater part of the small tuft of brown that appeared to urge itself from the shirt. The rest was for the eye to behold. Her breasts were petite in the sense that they rounded in symmetry to the rest of her figure. In the frozen stance that Aaron’s mind held her in, he could see the peak of her right breast exposed in its fullness while the edge of the shirt held the other behind its modest curtains. The peak was a rosy pink, several shades darker than the red that coated her lips, and seemed to eye Aaron with a peculiar gaze that seemed to curse his sight and yet called for him in lustful screams.
Her hands were curved in straight v’s, held there in the position of a track runner, with the fingertips of her right hand pointed towards the heavens and her left hand cocked back and fingers curled into purple fists. The cuffs of the sleeves were flying open against the wind, the buttons that held them together absent only to reveal thick clamps of darkening red scabs atop the hues of purples and pinks. And to his horror, he found those beautiful too.
The woman’s legs paused in an open stance hovering above the ground. Like a dancer would straighten her toes for a jump, she too did the same if only for the benefit of Aarons gaze. Her legs were long and soft, muscled to a perfection that kept them firm and feminine, climbing up towards the intimate spectacle the shirt failed to cover.
Just as Aaron’s eyes neared the lips that resided between the woman’s mid-air leap, time resumed with a horrendous slowness that haunted the air. Her hands swung forward, cutting through the friction like an expert, the tips of her toes touching upon the asphalt of the street just as her back leg swung for another step. In that moment, the idle traffic chose its moment.
A red car, its make and model forgotten by the overwhelming beauty of the woman, sped across the same lane.
Her hips with a resounding crack of thunder, pushing her body into a forced v, the flawlessness of her legs digging under the car, as her head snapped towards the windshield with a shatter that left the mystery if it was the car or her skull. In the slowness of time, her head snapped forward once more, the weightlessness of her hair trailing behind her, the green eyes opened to their fullness with an agonizing terror as her lips were smeared with a grimace that marked her end. The woman’s body followed suit, jerked forward with an inhuman turn that smothered the beauty of her bare breasts swaying with the direction of her head.
With that time returned to normal, the car speeding off into oblivion, the woman’s body rolling several feet before stopping in front of Aaron Carver. He looked down on her, the blood-matted hair covering her face, staring directly upwards at him from behind the brown veil, her body directed in a disturbing fashion away towards the ground, allowing him the ability to spot the several broken areas in her neck through the plastic-like flesh that allowed her to turn in such a way. Before he could look any further, the enchantment broke, causing him to turn and spew the contents of his stomach on the sidewalk floor.

message 2: by Dionne (new)

Dionne | 46 comments Nice beginning. I enjoyed reading it. Quite explicit, in my opinion. heeheehee

message 3: by Michael (new)

Michael Benavidez Dionne wrote: "Nice beginning. I enjoyed reading it. Quite explicit, in my opinion. heeheehee"

well not so much of a beginning as it is the entire length of the story, the way I see it is sometimes there doesn't really need to an entire plot to understand the meaning of it all. this was just on the sad true beauty the cruel world presents on us.
and yes very explicit sorry lol

message 4: by Dionne (new)

Dionne | 46 comments Well don't be sorry. It's an interesting piece despite all.

message 5: by Michael (new)

Michael Benavidez Thank you :)

message 6: by Diana (new)

Diana Feltner (dianafeltner) | 14 comments Explicit…yes, but needfully so to convey the story properly. I agree, it doesn't need to be lengthened, I think it's a great piece of flash fiction.

message 7: by Michael (new)

Michael Benavidez thank you Diana, I had forgotten I even posted this piece haha but thank you nonetheless for taking the time to read it, it is much much appreciated :)

message 8: by Brady (new)

Brady Longmore | 46 comments You sir, have a real talent for words!

message 9: by Michael (new)

Michael Benavidez Brady wrote: "You sir, have a real talent for words!"

Thank you! Thank you very very much it's really appreciated!

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