Net Work Book Club discussion
A Drabble Advent Calendar
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Kath
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Dec 14, 2013 08:12AM
Okiedoke! Voted! :)
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Congratulations to Tim A who won yesterday's ebook.Day 15 and a drabble from Jonathan is behind the door.
Carol by Jonathan Hill
The headmaster groaned and inwardly swore when he found out that Carol, known for her incredible stupidity, was in charge of props for this year’s school Christmas production. As soon as he walked into the dress rehearsal, a stench hit him. What looked like a dead goat had been plonked centre stage. A live goat was chasing children around the hall. And Carol was holding a test tube.
“What the f-”
Carol smiled. “I managed to get a goat of Christmas past, a goat of Christmas present, and here,” - she held her hand out - “is a goat of Christmas future.”
Ha ha ha, that's disgusting, but very good.
Fabulous - love this one!!
That's just Jonathan's sense of humour!
I know - he's a lovely lad - and he's 10 years younger than my baby boy!
Day 16 is another story from me.Just Giving
Ben was a greedy boy. He had to have everything he wanted and he had to have it NOW! He was getting old enough to understand, his mum had said, and ought to think more about other people.
She loved Christmas and worked so hard to make sure everyone had a good time. She took Ben shopping so he thought about other people instead of just himself. She worked herself into exhaustion and by Christmas was picking up every bug going. “Christmas isn’t about what you get; it’s about what you give!” Mum had said.
She gave everyone the flu!
Thanks Kath. As usual a fab drab. Our short story poll results are now visible, if anyone wants to see what placing the story they voted for reached.https://www.goodreads.com/poll/list/1...
Thanks Kath - another fab. drab.The poll results for our short story comp. are now visible for those who would like to see what placing the story they voted for reached in the rankings.
https://www.goodreads.com/poll/list/1...
Good one Kath, and I like Flo's description of fab drab :-))
She's got a way with words, that Flo! :)
She has that, no wonder she won the comp :-)
Ah, was that hers? I voted for that! ;)
Thanks both. I have to own up to Techno. Church being my story too, so yes I am feeling a bit pleased.... it would have meant so much more if there had been a lot more entries and I'd come first though.
Day 17 brings a drabble from Jonathan and a chance of a PRIZE!Charades by Jonathan Hill
Dave lived alone with his elderly mum. As was tradition on Christmas Day, he was acting out charades. Elspeth was attempting to guess them while cradling her fourth sherry.
While acting out another, Dave tripped, went flying into the Christmas tree and became entangled in the fairy lights.
Elspeth, not realising this was unintended, started screaming out answers.
“Shakin’ Stevens... The Smurfs... London Bridge is Falling Down!”
Meanwhile, Dave shook wildly as he was electrocuted, turned blue and dropped dead. Elspeth walked into the kitchen for a fifth sherry, pondering what films, books or songs might involve someone lying still.
***Stuck for a Christmas present? You might be interested to know that 100 One Hundred Word Tales by Jonathan Hill, and Beyond 100 Drabbles by Jonathan Hill and Kath Middleton are both now available in paperback from Amazon.***
Today, Jonathan and Kath are pleased to offer you the chance to win a rare DOUBLE-SIGNED copy of Beyond 100 Drabbles. To be in with a chance of winning, simply email your name and the word ‘TINSEL’ to drabbleduo@yahoo.co.uk by 10pm TOMORROW NIGHT. UK entrants only please - sorry! A winner will be chosen at random. Email addresses will be deleted after the winner has been contacted. Good luck!
Ooh, good one again today :-)) I'm going to miss reading these everyday, and think you should carry them on forever.
Haha! Nice idea! But I have a life - not much of one but, you know, I've got attached to it over the years!
....that's very selfish of you Kath!!
I thought Christmas was all about giving too. : 0
.....think we'd better stop now - I'm starting to feel sorry for poor Kath!!!
So you should, talk about ganging up on somebody. I agree with every word though, how selfish can she be, wanting to have a real life instead of writing dribbles for us lot.
(....shhhhhh - I promise I won't tell anyone about your faux-pas Suze **whispers** they're drabbles!!)
I only have 2 words to say: Spell Check :-))
..... a highly acceptable reason. lol
It shows that you have an inventive mind though Suze! lol
Oh yeah, I can come up with some great excuses. The one last week was the best though. I was having a seriously bad day and when OH came home I said "we'll have to have take out for tea, 'cos I forgot to turn the oven on". It worked too :-))
Oh girl, do I like your S.T.Y.L.E!!!
Day 18 sees a drabble from me and you still have the chance to win that double signed paperback. No skill required - it's a steal!A Single Star by Kath Middleton
The symbol of Christmas is a single star, above a manger or atop a tree. A single star was enough to guide the shepherds down from the hills and to the Bethlehem stable. A single star led the Magi from distant lands to find the child long prophesied. One star was enough to bring hope to the world. We all need a guiding light, a friend, a dream, a wish, an ambition, a hope.
My Christmas wish for you is that you will always see your guiding light; that there will always be for you at least a single star.
***Stuck for a Christmas present? You might be interested to know that 100 One Hundred Word Tales by Jonathan Hill, and Beyond 100 Drabbles by Jonathan Hill and Kath Middleton are both now available in paperback from Amazon.***
The competition is still running to win a DOUBLE-SIGNED copy of Beyond 100 Drabbles. To be in with a chance of winning, simply email your name and the word ‘TINSEL’ to drabbleduo@yahoo.co.uk by 10pm TONIGHT. UK entrants only please - sorry! A winner will be chosen at random. Email addresses will be deleted after the winner has been contacted. Good luck!
Thanks Linda. We all need something or someone. :)
Another good one. I've only just got round to reading todays :-)) Gonna miss these drabbles after next week.
The winner of the double signed copy of Beyond 100 Drabbles is... Ta-Da... Emma (Emz)! Behind the 19th door is another drabble and another prize!
Sleigh Bells by Jonathan Hill
"Daddy, Daddy, I can hear Santa! Does he always arrive this early?"
"No, honey, he'll come when you're asleep. That sound isn't sleigh bells; it's bottles clinking. Next door have just done their Christmas shop."
Later...
"Daddy, Daddy, Santa's here. I can hear the sleigh bells this time."
"No, honey, that's just your older brother's festive ringtone. He's not answering it because he's flat out on his back in the living room after drinking too much."
Later...
"Daddy, Daddy...""NO, honey, that's Uncle Ralph. You know, the one who's a Morris dancer. He's just come back from the pub pissed."
***Today you could win a unique prize - one lucky winner will have a drabble written personally for them by KATH about whatever he/she chooses! To be in with a chance of winning, simply email your name and the words ‘KATH, WRITE ME A DRABBLE ABOUT (subject or topic)’ to drabbleduo@yahoo.co.uk by 10pm tonight. A winner will be chosen at random. Email addresses will be deleted after the winner has been contacted. Good luck!***
What’s behind the 20th door of the Drabble Advent Calendar? A drabble from Kath and a chance to win another prize! Congratulations to Jennie who will have her personal drabble posted later today.Rudolph Goes for a Drink by Kath Middleton
It was the end of a busy Christmas delivery and Rudolph was shattered. He hung up his harness,
polished his hooves and set off to find somewhere to wind down in a relaxing atmosphere. He
walked into a rather full pub, leaned on the bar, ordered a pint and a packet of crisps and pushed
a £20 note across. The barman pulled him a pint of bitter, rummaged out a packet of crisps and
handed them over with some loose change.
“I’ve never seen a reindeer in here before,” he said.
“You won’t see another at these prices!” replied Rudolph.
***Today you could win a unique prize - one lucky winner will have a drabble written personally for them by JONATHAN about whatever he/she chooses! To be in with a chance of winning, simply email your name and the words ‘JONATHAN, WRITE ME A DRABBLE ABOUT…[insert topic/description here]…’ to drabbleduo@yahoo.co.uk by 10pm tonight. A winner will be chosen at random. Email addresses will be deleted after the winner has been contacted. Good luck!***
Ha ha ha, good one Rudolph. Thanks Kath :-))
Here's Jennie's prize. She asked for a drabble about a witch's garden.The Witch's Garden.
The three teenaged girls huddled at the bus stop.
"Yeah, it's true! She's a witch. I've been in her garden when she was out and it's full of all these like, poisonous plants. Bet they're for witch's brews and stuff."
"How d'you know they're poisonous then?"
"My dad says. He knows all about gardens and stuff."
"What's she got then?"
"There's foxgloves and lily of the valley. And monkshood, that tall blue one. That tree's a laburnum too! And she's got a yew tree. All poisonous. It's a witch's garden."
With a shock, I realised they were describing my own!
You can still enter for today's prize - till 10:00 p.m. Details above.
On the Solstice there's another thought provoking drabble from Jonathan.Christmas Pudding
Florence had just served her famous home-made Christmas pudding. She nodded and instantly everyone tucked into their dessert. “Enjoy,” Florence announced, “and you might be lucky enough to find a surprise in your helping!” But it was too late. One guest started choking, then another, then another. Hell, thought Florence, it’s flipping unlucky for a coin to find its way into every serving and go unnoticed by every eater! Florence rushed around the table, slapping backs and performing vigorous Heimlich Manoeuvres. Oh well, this nursing practice would stand her in good stead for when she later joined the Crimean War.
*** Yesterday's winner is Patti who will have a drabble written for her by Jonathan. It'll be posted later today.
Behind door 22 is a drabble from me and another chance for a £5 Amazon voucher. No skill required!Search for a Tree
Two young ladies went out to search for a Christmas tree. They felt it would be much better to find their own tree than to buy into the crass commercialism of Christmas. They took their warmest clothing, good strong gloves and a saw. They had even thought ahead sufficiently to take a sack with them, so they could bring their chosen tree back home.
They searched through the forest for hours but couldn't find what they were looking for. As night fell, one turned to the other and said, "Look, let's just take any tree, whether it's decorated or not!”
In addition to today’s drabble, there is a £5 Amazon voucher* up for grabs! To be in with a chance of winning, simply email your name and the word ‘BAUBLES’ to drabbleduo@yahoo.co.uk by 10pm TOMORROW. A winner will be chosen at random and announced tomorrow. Email addresses will be deleted after the winner has been contacted. Good luck!
*Please note the voucher is for the UK Amazon store only.
Haha! Excellent picture!On December 23rd, Jonathan has a drabble for us - and for the simple effort of emailing our drabbleduo address you are in with a chance of a £5 Amazon voucher.
Sweet Music
The lead carol singer stepped up to old Beatrice's doorbell and pressed. She took a minute or two to answer, but as soon as she did, the carollers' voices started up a mellifluous rendition of 'Silent Night'. By the end, tears were rolling down Beatrice's cheeks and she disappeared inside to fetch them some money. The carollers went away pleased as punch that their singing had earned them such generosity. Beatrice, though, who was stone deaf, hadn't heard a single note. It was their youth she had been moved by, for she wanted so much to be young again herself.
In addition to today’s drabble, there is a £5 Amazon voucher* up for grabs! To be in with a chance of winning, simply email your name and the word ‘BAUBLES’ to drabbleduo@yahoo.co.uk by 10pm TONIGHT. A winner will be chosen at random and announced tomorrow. Email addresses will be deleted after the winner has been contacted. Good luck!
*Please note the voucher is for the UK Amazon store only.
Thanks Kath, they never fail to make me smile.
Christmas Eve at last! Congratulations to Jim Webster who won the Amazon Voucher. Merry Christmas, Jim! A One Night Job by Kath Middleton
Father Christmas, or Saint Nicholas, to use his Sunday name, works just one night a year. Don't envy him though. Yes, he can spend the rest of the year golfing, crown green bowling and birdwatching but he pays for it with the annual Night From Hell.
Those Elves are nasty little brutes. It's like the worst infant class imaginable. He threatens to redeploy them as garden gnomes to restore order. Then the journey - it's better since the invention of the Sat Nav - not much though.
But the hangover is by far the worst. Be a pal. Leave him orange juice.
