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Romance > Trapped

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message 1: by georgiabread (new)

georgiabread | 30 comments This is my first story here... :)

message 2: by georgiabread (new)

georgiabread | 30 comments I fell against the white, wooden door, tears steaming down my face. My fists impacted the door, willing it to open. It wouldn't budge. We were trapped, enclosed in the tight space, with no way of escape.
I sobbed, droplets of tears falling from my cheeks and splashing into the frigid water below. It swirled around my legs, sending bolts of chill up through my body.
Once more I bashed on the door, desperately wishing for it to fly open, sending the water and myself gushing out. It didn't.
"'s no use," came a soft voice from behind me. I turned, my cheeks stained with tears.
"W-Will. I...I must keep trying. There has to be a way," I replied, tears brimming in my eyes once more.
"Harlow, please. You're exhausted. You've had enough. I hate to say it, but we can't escape."
I stared at him in disbelief. How could he be saying this? Why wasn't he helping?
"! There's always a way! Just help me, Will, help me! Please don't give up!" I begged, the tears breaking past my eyes and spilling down my face.
The water was now up to our knees. The room was filling fast. If we didn't get out soon, we would drown, perishing with most of the other passengers on board this ship.
"Harper, come here," Will said, opening up his arms to me. Part of me was saying to keep bashing on the door, to keep trying, but the other was saying to run into his arms and accept my fate.
I fell into Will's arms, sobbing, wrapping my arms around his neck. He was cold, so cold, but I didn't care. I was comforted that I was close to him, safe with him.
"Will...please. Help me get out. I can't give up-I won't. I promised my family I'd survive. If I don't, they'd be devastated...actually, more than that. They would be consumed by grief, pain and unrest. The memories of myself would haunt them forever. I'm doing this for my family. Just please help me get out. I know we can."
I could feel the water around my waist. Panic rose inside me; I couldn't hold it down. My heart rate increased, my breath panting and shaky. Suddenly Will lifted my chin so my eyes met with his own sad, worried ones. He was smiling sadly, and I could see tears in his eyes.
Will cocked his head and leaned forward. I found myself coming closer too, and suddenly I felt his lips against mine. Heat rose to my cheeks, and I closed my eyes, the feeling magical. I was gripping his arm, he doing the same thing.
Will's lips broke away from mine, and inside I felt completely disappointed. I hadn't wanted that moment to end, ever. Will was touching my chin again, and he closed his eyes for second.
Will squeezed my hand. "I will help you, Harper."

message 3: by ✿ αzzι ✿ (new)

✿ αzzι ✿ (azziplz) *Comment*

It's reaaaally good! I want to know more - who are these people, and why they are in a room filling with water xD

message 4: by georgiabread (new)

georgiabread | 30 comments Thank you!!! :D I will write more soon :)

message 5: by sᴏᴘʜ|☂ (new)

sᴏᴘʜ|☂ (nowoffish) mmmmmmm...
I love it!!

message 6: by sᴏᴘʜ|☂ (new)

sᴏᴘʜ|☂ (nowoffish) heh. get it? love? romance? ahh nevermind

message 7: by [deleted user] (new)

whoa they're kissing already? Okay, don't mind that comment, that is coming from someone who doesn't understand romance at all.

Uoo I see that they're kind of in a screwed up situation, I like that. I'd love to see the next chapter! This is going to be great!

message 8: by georgiabread (new)

georgiabread | 30 comments Well they've known each other in the past, although it doesn't explain that :P

message 9: by [deleted user] (new)

it's great you know, I can see there's so much potential in here. Just try to balance the dynamic, especially on the beginning. You can always put element of surprises but you have to be tricky about it 8]

message 10: by georgiabread (new)

georgiabread | 30 comments Woah, it's been a while O.o I won't write now but I promise I will very soon! :)

message 11: by Nuzhat (new)

Nuzhat Yousuf (shababa51) | 8 comments Really nice ;)

message 12: by Kat (new)

Kat Desi (katdesiwrites) | 61 comments Ooh. Interesting. Seems like one of those friends to lovers story, isn't it? Would like to read more.

message 13: by Diana (new)

Diana Feltner (dianafeltner) | 14 comments This could definitely be expanded into a wonderful story! Keep writing, very good! One little thing I did catch though, is your leading lady's name Harlow or Harper? I'm not picking, I've changed character's names in mid story myself and forgot to go back and correct it. Thankfully, my beta reader caught it. :) Good job!

message 14: by georgiabread (new)

georgiabread | 30 comments Oh haha whoops! I don't know :P thank you!

message 15: by Brady (new)

Brady Longmore | 46 comments It's a good start. Nice attention grabber for the beginning of a story. Keep it up.

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