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message 1: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (last edited Nov 21, 2013 08:14PM) (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
Share your jokes here :)

Please no racial jokes, appearance based jokes etc. They will be deleted.


message 2: by MiMi (new)

MiMi (planetearthturnsslowly) Why do sharks live in salt water?


If it was pepper water they would always sneeze!!


message 3: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean!!!


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments Why did the skeleton go to the movies alone?
ANSWER-He had NO BODY to go with!
(get it? No BODY!)
I know not funny


message 5: by Tia (new)

Tia Jenkins (tia_jenkins) XD that's a knee slapper


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments LittleMissJunior(Tia) wrote: "XD that's a knee slapper"

:]
Finally, a good remark!
My friends always tell me my jokes are horrible. And they are but...


message 7: by Tia (new)

Tia Jenkins (tia_jenkins) I've heard that joke before... Even though the jokes are lame their funny too


message 8: by Sami (new)

Sami H. why didn't the skeleton cross the road?


because he didn't have the guts!

I knowww, corny.........


message 9: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
XDD


message 10: by Sami (new)

Sami H. :)


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments Sami wrote: "why didn't the skeleton cross the road?


because he didn't have the guts!

I knowww, corny........."


I like that!


message 12: by Sami (new)

Sami H. lol thx:)


message 13: by MiMi (new)

MiMi (planetearthturnsslowly) This joke is for you people who speak Spanish!

What if soy milk is really just milk introducing itself in Spanish?? XD

IF YOU DONT GET IT READ HERE!! (soy means "I am" in Spanish so soy milk is "I am milk") XD


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments MiMi wrote: "This joke is for you people who speak Spanish!

What if soy milk is really just milk introducing itself in Spanish?? XD

IF YOU DONT GET IT READ HERE!! (soy means "I am" in Spanish so soy milk is "..."


Mimi es cómico.
:)


message 15: by MiMi (new)

MiMi (planetearthturnsslowly) Haha gracias! Mi maestro habla ?? Something like that idk. My teacher told us that. I am in beginners Spanish.


message 16: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
Me gusta leer.

I'm sure this applies to most of us if not all XD


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments MiMi wrote: "Haha gracias! Mi maestro habla ?? Something like that idk. My teacher told us that. I am in beginners Spanish."

Same! My sister speaks better than me but I'm taking beginners too.
Maestro el hombre o la mujer?


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments Miss FabCat wrote: "Me gusta leer.

I'm sure this applies to most of us if not all XD"


:)


message 19: by MiMi (new)

MiMi (planetearthturnsslowly) Maestro es el hombre. Tambien él es viejo!!


message 20: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (last edited Nov 21, 2013 05:27PM) (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
I got this

Teacher is a man ... something...?


message 21: by MiMi (new)

MiMi (planetearthturnsslowly) My teacher is a man also he is old.


message 22: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
Ah well I got the first part so yay me XD


message 23: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
But you have to put

Mi maestro es.... so it says MY teacher, just saying..


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments MiMi wrote: "Maestro es el hombre. Tambien él es viejo!!"

¡sí, sí!
mi también! Mi maestro es un hombre y es gusta cuarenta.
(sorry, for late reply, had to eat.)


message 25: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
Hehe, I got this...

Yes, yes!
Me too! My teacher is a man and is like forty


message 26: by MiMi (new)

MiMi (planetearthturnsslowly) yeah well when i say old.... i mean at least 60


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments MiMi wrote: "yeah well when i say old.... i mean at least 60"

:O


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments Miss FabCat wrote: "Hehe, I got this...

Yes, yes!
Me too! My teacher is a man and is like forty"


:)


message 29: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
My old chorus teacher was 64. Not a big deal


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments Miss FabCat wrote: "My old chorus teacher was 64. Not a big deal"

:O
no big deal?


message 31: by Cat , The Fabulous Kitty MOD <3 (new)

Cat  (cat335) | 1051 comments Mod
Well...he couldn't sing...he's retired now...

But as an age I don't think its weird or old. People age... It happens...

I'm happy he got the most out of his years teaching etc.


message 32: by brooke1994 (new)

brooke1994  (formerlynarnian525) | 83 comments ~Nobody~♫I'm Still Alive but I'm Barely Breathing♫~ wrote: "Why was the cook so mean

Because he BEATS the eggs and WHIPS the cream.

Haha....not funny....i suck at jokes."

Lol! That's good :P Ha ha.


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments Miss FabCat wrote: "Well...he couldn't sing...he's retired now...

But as an age I don't think its weird or old. People age... It happens...

I'm happy he got the most out of his years teaching etc."


I had a teacher who was 65 last year and I hated him.
He wouldn't stop staring at me.


message 34: by Zoe (new)

Zoe Hulsey (zmh203) | 108 comments When your out of the bathroom, your spanish. But what are you when your IN the bathroom?

UraPEEin!


message 35: by Kyren (new)

Kyren | 29 comments Ha! That's pretty good!
Here's a longish one:

Sherlock Holmes and Watson went camping. After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night and go to sleep. Some six hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend awake, "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." Watson replies, "I see millions and millions of stars." "And what does that tell you?" askes Holmes. Watson ponders for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximatly a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all-powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?" Holmes is silent for a moment then says, "Watson, you idiot! Someone has stolen our tent!"


message 36: by Tia (new)

Tia Jenkins (tia_jenkins) Hahaha that is funny


message 37: by MiMi (new)

MiMi (planetearthturnsslowly) Chemistry joke time!

What do you do with a sick chemist?

Well if you can't Curium and you can't Helium the. You might as well just Barium! XD


message 38: by Tia (new)

Tia Jenkins (tia_jenkins) That's clever!! Haha


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments Why did the Easter egg hide?
Answer-He was a little chicken!

Once again, corny.


message 40: by Tia (new)

Tia Jenkins (tia_jenkins) MOst jokes are corny XD


❤♥♔Nia♔♥❤ (nothingatthemoment) | 157 comments LittleMissJunior(Tia) wrote: "MOst jokes are corny XD"

:)


message 42: by [deleted user] (new)

^^^ Am I missing something? I don't get it.


message 43: by [deleted user] (new)

Ohhhh, I feel so dumb!!!! Thanks for clearing that up!


message 44: by [deleted user] (new)

^^^ Thanks!

I have the corniest joke ever:
Why was six afraid of seven?

Answer: Because seven, eight, nine!!!


message 45: by MiMi (new)

MiMi (planetearthturnsslowly) Here is a classic and some copies of it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Why did the whale cross the ocean? To get I the other tide

Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide

Why did the dog cross the yard? To get to the other raw hide

Why did the cat cross the house? To be another spy


message 46: by Katie (new)

Katie | 20 comments haha cool!


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