The Two Line Poem Game (no word limit) Showing 1,151-1,200 of 2,504

[Preston, Moderator]

But if I read a picture book,
I look for the 1st Baron Beaverbrook,

[Preston, Moderator]

For come what might and come what will,
He a was a friend to Sir Winston Churchill.

[Roger]

Beaverbrook was a great "baron" of the British press.
He printed my parents' favorite paper, the Daily Express.

[Roger]

The Daily Express was the world's biggest newspaper around, and
It reached a circulation of three million, seven hundred and six thousand.

[Preston, Moderator]

I think papers are a snooze,
they won't print it if it's not news.

[Preston, Moderator]

I wanted to put my best head shot in it,
they kicked me out in under a minute.

[Preston, Moderator]

I said what else is a paper good for?
Then the threw me out the door,

[Preston, Moderator]

Everyone to their own taste,
But newspapers are a waste.

[Roger]

Newspapers only print the news that's bad
Because it sells papers and makes me sad.

[Roger]

But that goes for news on the telly,
It's so dire you crawl on your belly,

[Roger]

Anything to avoid what's noble or goodly
Nothing on TV is as good as it should be.

[Preston, Moderator]

That is why it was my decision,
not to bother watching television.

[Preston, Moderator]

Addicts who need a moving picture fix,
Can watch streaming media on Netflix.

[Preston, Moderator]

If you don't want to get the blues,
Avoid newspapers and TV news.

[Roger]

It's all right, however, to watch BBC "Breakfast"
Because nothing shown or said there can last.

[Roger]

The best item they ever had,
Which was good and not bad,

[Roger]

Was the man who called Tony Blair a liar
And then leapt from his set to seat him on fire.

[Preston, Moderator]

The news was all ablaze,
Burning Tony was the new craze.

[Preston, Moderator]

You had to do it fast,
Because crazes don't last.

[Preston, Moderator]

The next craze was selling big shoes,
standing on a street corner like it was the news.

[Roger]

Or selling fire extinguishers that are foamless
To raise lots of money for the homeless.

[Roger]

Use them wisely to extinguish Tony,
When he's ablaze he gets so moany.

[Roger]

But you see no one made a hurried rush
To put out the fire consuming WW Bush.

[Roger]

Others prayed it wouldn't become rainy
And damp the flames burning Dick Cheney.

[Preston, Moderator]

But the extinguishers which were much in demand,
Were outlawed by EU command.

[Preston, Moderator]

No one every knew why,
They did not want to start a hue and cry,

[Preston, Moderator]

Because the EU said do or die.
So all we could say was "oh me oh my!".

[Roger]

It wasn't so much the lack of a hue and cry,
More too much of Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry

[Roger]

That made France stand up and boast
Of Dame Nellie Melba now she's toast.

[Preston, Moderator]

The French will welcome a French speaker,
If you can't speak French your greeting is much weaker.

[Preston, Moderator]

Brits and Yanks can speak but sooner or later,
They will have to call in an English translator.

[Preston, Moderator]

The Russians are really quite the bore,
Don't bother to speak, they just ignore.

[Roger]

In the Philippines they natter in Tagalog
And learning the lingo is quite a slog,

[Roger]

But if you do you have a better go
At landing a handsome Filipino.

[Preston, Moderator]

If you're in Greece and you can't speak Greek,
You're up a paddle without a creek.

[Preston, Moderator]

If you're in Spain and can't speak Spanish,
All your words will just up and vanish.

[Preston, Moderator]

If your in Belgium and cant speak Phlegm,
just cover your mouth, cough, and say "Ahem".

[Roger]

If you're in France and can't speak Frog,
You'd be best falling off a log.

[Roger]

And up in Yorkshire the lingo's a joke
Because there's nowt as queer as folk.

[Preston, Moderator]

It's now October and the frost is the pumpkin,
I like a pumpkin pie but I prefer an apple dumplin.

[Preston, Moderator]

Roger's making great deserts from a plum,
I just wish somehow I could get me some.

[Preston, Moderator]

I saw in the store a can of spotted dick,
But the label showed it would make me too thick.

[Preston, Moderator]

I love all ice cream but I'll pick if I must,
Apple pie ice cream because it's got pie crust.

[Roger]

If I want me a quick fumble
I always opt for apple crumble,

[Roger]

Or Harry's Bar pancakes with lovely batter
Which is so delicious it makes you fatter.

[Roger]

But when served flaming in cointreau
The diners stare, drool, and go, "Oh!"

[Preston, Moderator]

Hey that Christopher Columbus,
sailed the world without a compass,

[Preston, Moderator]

When his crew began a rumpus,
up spoke Christopher Columbus.

[Preston, Moderator]

He said because this world round,
we'll be safe and sound.

[Preston, Moderator]

We cannot go wrong,
if we swing with a song.