Letters Of Sadness

[[deleted user]]

I try not to jynx myself, but sometimes I can't help it.

And its fine. I like your kind of attitude...

[Kat]

To the people who think I am a ‘quiet’ kid,
If you knew me, quiet wouldn’t be in my dictionary. I am the opposite of quiet once you get to know me. I appear quiet on the outside because I am afraid of talking. I’m afraid of talking because I don’t like being judged. I am afraid of being bullied even more, I wish I could talk and not be so quiet. I have been bullied my whole life, even when I was in preschool. My only memories of preschool are being bullied. It made me really quiet, it made me afraid to talk to people. I wish I could change though, I wish I could talk during class, and not care what people thought. I wish I could erase all the bad memories, I wish I could tell people to leave me alone-but I can’t. It would make me stand out even more. People who call me quiet, don’t even realize that I am being bullied. They think I just don’t like to talk…I wish that was the reason why I don’t talk. The truth is, I love to talk. I love saying hi to people and now I don’t like to…it was all because of me being bullied for so many years. From preschool-all the way to high school…I wish I could have a voice, I wish I could change..but I don’t know if I could. I have been bullied into silence.

[Kat]

Today, I came to school and these three girls were pointing at me and whispering. I don't even talk to them and I guess I thought since I was out for the summer, the bullying would stop. But Tuesday at school kind of messed up my esteem

[Kat]

You made me feel better already

[Summer]

Dear World,

I know there's a lot of us in the world, and I know a lot of us want to be heard and want to be loved, and I know that there are people less fortunate than I am and that in the great scheme of things I really do have it great and I should be blessed and happy for everything...

I shouldn't be complaining. I shouldn't feel so down. I have no logical reason to feel blue and yet I do. I feel down about myself for no reason, my job for no reason, my family for no reason, everything just sucks and there isn't a good reason for me to feel that way. I hate feeling like this. I hate it so much, and I hate it even more so because it isn't something I can understand.

I'm not just 'looking for attention' and I'm not looking to bring others to have a pity party with me...

... World, can I take a time out for a second? I just really need a hug and maybe a Coca-Cola 'cause missing your anti-depressant and have a caffeine headache is a bitch... don't let me fall asleep before taking it again!

With love,
Summer

[[deleted user]]

Dear members of this group,

I am sorry to say this, but I am leaving. I may come back later, but I am not sure. I really do hate to leave, but personal reasons have gotten in the way. I am still open to talk if you need to, just shoot me a message. :3 I really hope to talk to you guys again soon!

With love,

L.

[[deleted user]]

L, I will miss you so much!! If you ever need anything, you can message me. Please come back someday if you can. Love you!!

[[deleted user]]

Dear everyone,

I am done. I am sorry. I hate myself, and I am unwanted. I am a waste of space. I am hated and despised. I want to die. I cut so much, and I am know going to starve myself to death. Good bye people of this group, I am glad you guys never got to know me in real life...

Yoite (Shion)

[[deleted user]]

:(

[Jackie - Fire & Ice Book Reviews]

...?

[[deleted user]]

Abraham, I believe their is someone out there for everyone. You will find someone and they will love you for you and respect your needs and wants. God makes you wait because when the time comes, it shall be so so so much sweeter:) but you will find somebody, I know you will:)

[Kat]

I'm a New Yorker and gay and there's ton of gay people in NY who don't sleep around

[[deleted user]]

Dear Society,

I give up. I won't do what I want anymore. I give up on all of my dreams of short hair and nerdy/guy like cloths. I will stop eating so much when I go out for dinner and order the salad instead of the ribs or the burger or just drink water. I will store all of my loose jeans and t-shirts and go get name brand crap and get dresses and skirts and necklaces and those weird shirts that just kinda hang of the shoulders. I will start wearing make up and I will do my hair in the morning.

I have given up on being individual and will fall into the pit of people who all look the same. I will be a Cheerio in the box of Cheeios. I will give up my Doctor Who and anime and start talking about boys or what ever the crap normal girls talk about or be the silent one that only listens.

From,
L.

[[deleted user]]

L, you need to be yourself. Did something happen?

[[deleted user]]

Dear wardrobe,

I am sorry for thinning you out so much. I know most of the stuff that i have cleared out is pretty new, but I have mare up my mind. I have made three piles for my sake:
What normal girls wear
Only wear during band if required or will be helpful
Memories and
What normal girls don't wear

I promise I will fill you up when it is considered time for new cloths for my mom and I won't add any new anime or Doctor Who items and make you unfit for the public or school.
The next step for me is to store my books, then learn how to put on make up, so you aren't going to be alone for long.

Love,
L.

[[deleted user]]

Dear me,

I am sorry.
Sorry for hating you so much.
Sorry for cutting myself.
Sorry for not eating right.
Sorry for wanting to end it all.
Sorry for being a failure.
I am so
so sorry.
I have failed you.
I have failed to make this life worth living.
I have failed in being a human being.
I am so
so sorry for what I have done.
I have pushed so many people away;
and yet you forgive me.
But I do not disserve it.
I am you
and you are me
and I have failed everything....
I...
am...
so...
sorry...

-Serena (Yoite)

[Raven]

L, please be yourself. it doesn't matter what "normal" girls do. They're not perfect and by no means do you have to act like them if you don't want to. Don't hang with them if they don't love who you really are. If you pretend to be someone you're not, you'll never be happy. I'm far from normal! I am an anime geek who loves having a unique clothing style, (who cares what others think!) I love trivia and computer games, I play "Magic The Gathering," I'm a poet, and I am a bookworm. There are so many people out there who will be your friend because you're YOU! please don't give up on yourself! I believe in you.

[[deleted user]]

Dear society,

I have made another leap into 'normalness'. I have stores all of my manga up and out of sight along with most of my anime stuff. My cloths have been sorted out(and I am pissed one of my shirts went to my sister because I would have like to keep it, but my mom is like 'oh, you are giving this away? Your sister has interest, lets give it to her' though I wanted to put it in my memories pile). The big pile of t-shirts I have no idea what to do with them. Most of them are new and I don't want to give them away, my mom will get weird on me if I try to store them, but I can't wear them because they are not to your 'normal' and 'pretty' standards.

I still have a lot to go, but I am working on it. I hope you are happy with the turn out when I am finished with it all.

Love,
L.

[Summer]

Dear Charlie Higson,

I finished book 4, and it was awesome- just like all the other books in the series.

I read that book 5 won't come out in the UK until Sept.... which if it takes as long for book 5 to get here as it did book 4, then I won't get to read it until next summer.

I don't want to wait that long ; n;

*cries*



With love,
Summer

[[deleted user]]

Oh, it's okay Summer *hugs*

[Summer]

๓คςкєภչเє wrote: "Oh, it's okay Summer *hugs*"

*sniffle* Thanks, Makz. But it's such a good series! I love it so <3

[[deleted user]]

You're welcome. I bet it is.

[[deleted user]]

N-----,
I'm not even mad anymore. Just sad. Why did you have to bully us? Don't you see it's one of the reasons I lost my best friend? But I guess you wouldn't care.
I know you're dad's been overseas, so you were having a hard time, but that's no excuse to be a jerk.

Your not-so loving neighbor,
Makz

[Summer]

Dear Summer (myself),

They've finally decided to entrust you with something you really love at the library, and I know you're so excited about it- you just want to scream it to the world. You've done nothing but promote for the past two months because you want a really good turn-out and I know you're a little nervous because you haven't gotten a lot of feedback from the community. Thankfully, most of you is an optimist so you're hoping they are just too shy to talk to you... but I want to brace you that there is the possibility no one will come, and I don't want your feelings to get hurt.

Don't take it personally. It's not that people don't like you. A lot of the problems hovering over this event are completely out of your control. You took what you could work with and tried your best to make it the best program you could. If you tried your best, you have nothing to be ashamed about.

It's okay to get a little mad. I mean, you put a lot of time into making this stuff happen. If nobody comes, it'll all be wasted. But you know what? That'll be one less thing for you to worry about, so you can focus on other important things in your life and learn from this.

I sincerely hope that people do come to the event and they do have a good time, but I just wanted to let you know in advance that sometimes things don't happen the way we want them too, and even if it's a failure, you should still stand tall. Okay?

With love,
Summer (myself)

[Caitlin (CraziiCat♥)]

Okay, here are a few things I wanna say.

Dear N...

As well as being my cousin, you are one of my best friends. Despite our differences, you are the closest thing to a sister I have. I quite simply adore you, and yet I also cannot stand you. You are full of contridictions and rules that apply to everyone else but yourself. You call me crazy and say that I act like a 6 year old, and yet that can also apply to you. It's not my fault that I have a reluctance to grow up, unlike you who acts a lot older than you are.
As someone who cares about you, please make the most of your childhood and don't let others force you to grow up.

Thanks
Cait


Dear H and A....

Though I would never admit this to your faces, I prefer(ed) H without A and vice versa. You both made me happy and sad all in one go. But you never noticed it until that fateful Thursday, a few weeks back. To be honest, I've never truly felt accepted into your little group and never felt good enough for either of you. You made (and still makes) me feel worthless at times, and yet you would dismiss it as a joke. Well sorry but I aint laughing. The worst thing is, how you never gave me a chance to sort things out, had it been either of you who had done what I did, then there is no doubt that you would be welcomed back with open arms. That day you claim to have given me a choice, leave your little group for good or come back but not be as trusted or involved, but as far as I can see I had no choice.
But despite all of my anger and sadness, I will thank you for one thing; for breaking me down in front of (pretty much) everyone who knew me and for destroying me so much that I finally realised that I was better off without you.

From
Caitlin

P.S: For the record, the reason I left you was because of you H. I had to protect you, my heart and the tattered remains of my reputation. But had you bothered to take your head from your own world, you may have noticed that.

[[deleted user]]

Dear --------,

Oh, I am so sorry. I do not know what I did wrong, but please know if you need to talk I am here. I am so sorry if I have caused you wrong. But I also wish to thank you for worrying enough to send that screen-shot to my mother. I wish I could get up the might to tell your mother that you are hurting, so you could get help..... My mother, I made her cry and I am done posting things about me on here or facebook. I cannot stand hurting anyone I care deeply for..... Thank you and I am so sorry that I have done this..... and that I pushed my horrible sadness and never-ending depression on you....

-Serena

[Summer]

Dear whomever may be listening, God maybe? ,

I'm so embarrassed and nervous I could die.

If I'm lucky, I will.

If I'm unlucky, I'll hide... unable to show my face again.

Why am I so good at destroying things? I don't want to be a monster, but I'm just so good at scaring everybody away. I wonder sometimes if I'm just predestined to be lonely. I wish I wasn't. I don't like it. If I have to be destructive, can I at least destroy the things that hurt my friends? It would help if I really had some to begin with...

-- Summer.

[[deleted user]]

What's wrong, Summer? :(

[[deleted user]]

Dear mom,

I am sorry for everything. I really wish you hadn't bought me that car now, I know I am a waste of your money. I will pay you back for the laptop once I get the money, I promise. I don't care if you said you would pay half, I am going to pay you back in full. I will start messing with the stuff you bought me a while back. I will start drawing again and using all of my art supplies to make shitty pictures. I will try to pay you back for everything since I don't use some of the stuff anymore.

From,
L.


Dear society,

I will have to thank you later for pushing me to try to fit in, for pointing out that I am too fat for you(I will work on that when school starts since I am not required to eat most of the day). You will save my family a lot of money in the long run because I will keep my hideous pink room and my 'girly' furniture and we won't have to buy me new stuff! That is going to help give more money to go to the kitchen and bathroom remodeling! Thank you again.

L.

[[deleted user]]

Dear world,

My insanity has finally started to show itself.

From,
L.

[[deleted user]]

dear ...I dunno people, world

I will try to fit in this year. I will try to push past my autistic ways and talk to people. I will try to ware makeup and paint my nails and not bite them. I will try to ware 'normal' stuff

-yoite

[[deleted user]]

Dear everyone,

I am deleting my account tomorrow morning. I never notice how truly alone I was until now. I know you guys will get over me quickly and someone in this group will be jumping for joy that I am gone. I'm sorry for bothering you guys and I don't want to get in your way again.

Goodbye,
from,
L.

[[deleted user]]

@ L

Don't leave!! I love reading your posts about band and knowing there are other people out there like me. Band geeks who feel not appreciated. Please! Don't go!!

[Erin]

L, don't leave!!! I will miss you!! I love your posts about band and just talking to you in general.

[[deleted user]]

Dear self,

Why are you smiling less every day? Your mask is quickly breaking, people are getting curious and your mother has noticed. Smile more so they won't notice anymore and forget. Look happy even if you don't think anyone is watching.

From,
WSWFC

[[deleted user]]

Dear life,
You throw a million obstacles at me and I can't get through anymore. I cry myself to sleep. Why do you have to hurt people like me so badly.
You've forced my girlfriend into injuring herself and I can't go on. I cry on her shoulder as she does mine, but you are hurting us. We both want to give up. Why are you doing this to us?
I smile and pretend it's all right, but the gauze scratching my wrist says otherwise. I keep my hands to my sides so it doesn't show, and I look down and stay quiet so people don't ask questions.
Why do you do it to only certain people? Why me? Why can't I go on?
~Joey

[Erin]

Kassi, do you need to talk about it? I'm here for you <3

[[deleted user]]

I'm fine. It's just my gf. We are getting way far apart. I'm pretty sure doesn't even consider me her gf.
She keep hurting herself and it's breaking me apart.

[Erin]

Oh no:( I'm sorry:( *hugs tightly*

[[deleted user]]

*hugs back*

[Erin]

I have to go, but I'll be on in the morning if you need anything. Stay strong. Love you <3

[[deleted user]]

Okay, love you.

[[deleted user]]

Dear friends,
I think I need to take a break. I need to stop hiding behind the internet and face the pain waiting for me as soon as I speak again. I need to be strong, and watch out for all you guys.
You are better off without me, but I will come back, one day, but until then, you can jump for joy that I finally left you.
~Kassi Jo

[[deleted user]]

Whatever. I have to go right now. I have school.

[[deleted user]]

No! No Jessy! No! No! No!

[Sierra]

What's wrong? :(

[Erin]

Kassi, we love you and will always be here for you!

[[deleted user]]

@Sierra I don't know.

@Erin I dunno. I just don't feel it anymore.

[Erin]

@Kassi, why not?:(

[Sierra]

So you're taking a break from gr?