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Episode 66; Does It Matter If Your Partner Reads?
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interesting. . . my husband is a big reader so we do talk about books. I actually pick all of his books for him and he calls me the "Minister of Information". . . but sometimes it's annoying. Like we both read The Lower River by Paul Theroux and he quit 10 pages before the end saying "why does he have to hit us over the head with all the symbolism? Does he think we're stupid??" and I was like "what symbolism?" so, it can be annoying. . . but overall it's probably good to have partners who are interested in other things. . . my husband is an economist and I'm a doctor and I thank god every day that I didn't have to marry another doctor, b/c I'm the sort of person who wd talk about work nonstop at home. . . but since it takes so much explanation to tell him any work stories I've given up. . .
@Becky - I love your title "Minister of Information"!
my husband is not a big reader, but he does read when he takes our daughter to piano and girl scouts. so while it might take him a month to read a book, I devour them in days. I do remember early on I would give him short stories or poems to read and he would do the same for me. He is a musician, so there is a creative side to him and he definitely understands my love of books.
I think it would add to the conversation more if the other partner reads. My fiance likes non-fiction, but does not so much like or understand the point of fiction. That is hard for me, because I believe that reading fiction teaches us empathy--we argue about this sometimes. Anyways, recently he read "Unbroken" which I had also read and really loved. It took me everything I had not to ask if he had gotten to certain parts yet--I had to wait for him to tell me about it. That was a great experience though because we both had something to share and I loved hearing his perspective.
I'm enjoying the conversation. I agree that it is nice to have something to share, bits and pieces of great books.
My husband doesn't read novels but he does read a lot of magazines and non-fiction (mainly about cars). He did get a little stressed when books started to pile up on the dining table but he smiles indulgently at the double stacked shelves and says that having books all over the place makes us look intellectual!
My husband finds it tiring reading novels as english is his third language (after arabic and french).He's not quite fluent enough for it to feel relaxing. He does read a lot of newspapers though. Sometimes I think it'd be lovely to talk books but in this internet age at least there are other outlets like this..
June wrote: "My husband finds it tiring reading novels as english is his third language (after arabic and french).He's not quite fluent enough for it to feel relaxing. He does read a lot of newspapers though. S..."Have you ever thought of getting books in both languages?
My daughter has the Hunger Games in Hebrew (her mother-tongue) while I have a set in English(my mother-tongue) and it is great to be able to chat about the books together.
Can it work? Well, obviously it does as I've been married almost 43 years. Still, there are times when I hear someone say "My "Fill in the Blank" suggested this book to me, "We read parts of this book outloud to each other", "We had a great discussion of this book", "We disagreed about this or that", "We are in a book group together", I wonder if I'm missing something.
Perhaps having this one thing, reading that is all my own is not such a bad thing.
What do others think about this topic?