Write, Wrote, Written discussion
Alia's Writing
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my writing... this is my style.!) :) # 10
when i was aboult 10-11 i was at one of my worst points of getting pick on and i needed an anchor....... this is where i think i found my true self and something i feel like i needed to do. Thank you. hope you like :)written in 2012
(p1)
Your not alone.
When you see the crystal clear teardrops falling from the sky, you wonder which cloud is getting bullied by something bigger like a tornado or a storm. When you feel the refreshing wind the same one that wakes you up every midnight, you taste the truly magnificent drops of delight running through your mouth as you get a spine chill signifying your not alone. Thats what gets you up every morning. Thats what gets you through day and night. So when your feeling down remember all the amzing things in life because your not alone.
Alia wrote: "ok i think this is correct. please like my writing and tell me what you think about it!?!??!? it would mean a lot!!! thnx to everyone who reads my stuff! ok here go's"Well, its very genuine and real and therefore, charming; it has a lot of feeling. That's very important! But as far as publishing? Its not really apt for anything else except a diary, journal, blog, or personal memoir. There's nothing wrong in realizing this; no shame--it's just a consequence of the type of writing it is. Best for some kind of internet presentation.
Feliks wrote: "Alia wrote: "ok i think this is correct. please like my writing and tell me what you think about it!?!??!? it would mean a lot!!! thnx to everyone who reads my stuff! ok here go's"Well, its very ..."
Thank you, i greatly appreciate your oppinon! and yes poetry grammer dont tend to stick to the straight path for some people, especially for me. but this is one of my oldest peices and mine now still is not as perfectly correct as they could be that on the straight road -(especially my spelling)- but do you think its enough for people to like and appreciate my work and want to read more?
Ok I will put up another one. I hope more people will like and comment on this one. I wrote this in class when the teacher asked us to write about life being sour sometimes, i think its funny. I wrote it on 7.3.14 age 13
LIFE IS A LEMON ...............
Life is a lemon
sour,
bitter,
and sweet.
Life is not described as a peice of cake, it has less good bits in humanity as it does mistakes.
Life is a challenge, urging us to take it on.
Life is a lemon
sour,
bitter,
and sweet forcing us to oppinionate everyone we meet.
Life is a complication, obligating us to create and graduate every obstacle in life we fall upon.
Life is a lemon becoming sour, bitter and sweet.
Life has a lot of doors and obstacles that are frustrating, annoying and silly but it can also be pretty neat
(p2)
My advice is to not change your style to be 'perfect'. Keep it like it is. It would be an enormous task to make what you write 'perfect English', so why do it? There's more 'feeling' in it the way it is now.
awesome thanks!! btw im starting off with the oldest, less good, and less heartfelt ones. i have some really good one coming up............ but i may just not be that good because you seem to be the only person who wants to comment
Mod
cool! :) did you like them?i have more coming up...........
Alia wrote: "when i was aboult 10-11 i was at one of my worst points of getting pick on and i needed an anchor....... this is where i think i found my true self and something i feel like i needed to do. Thank you. hope you like :)..."I liked this one best. But you cleaned it up? Go back to the original! Like this:
Alia wrote: "ok i think this is correct. please like my writing and tell me what you think about it!?!??!? it would mean a lot!!! thnx to everyone who reads my stuff! ok here go's"..."
p.s. and instead of writing 'what life is like'...you should tell about who was picking on you and why? That's the real story.
ok the "on bad days" peice, takes too long to write in my lunch time so that is why im doing it after school. I have a short one here for you that i hope you like, will you figure out the meaning within the lines?? lets see. written in 2014.Three apples high
.................
Three apples high and yet a jiant, feeding off unsalted waters.
Crouching in wait in the pond critters lake, bathing in the sun heated water.
In the shade where it's cold, mucky and murkey and where the tide's always coming and going.
Where the currents ripple and sway in every which way while the middle always stays the same.
Where only the lost and not warned would dare to go, there he stays in his crippled state but with the strength of his fellow four hundred fallen soldiers.
He lies there in wait with the remaining bones of his ony.
Red eyes, black heart and the teeth of a great white shark.
He lives there in only that state, not knowing of any better.
With only the company of his sanity that remains, still slipping away leaving him in his delusional way.
(p3)
Alia wrote: "ok i think this is correct. please like my writing and tell me what you think about it!?!??!? it would mean a lot!!! thnx to everyone who reads my stuff! ok here go's"..."..."It is specifically this style which I like. Kinda like web-speak or as if you're texting it.
cool- but would you consider this a good peice?do you read it and want to hear more- and when you read it do you amagine what is happining and what it means?
ok well i have permission to be on the computer and i just could not wait to see what people think about one of my top favourite peices "on bad days" so im going to write it out now for anyone who wants to read it.(PLEASE READ IT!!!!!! PLEASE LIKE IT!!!!!!! AND PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!!!!!!!!
On bad days...........
On bad days a smile is desperate, on bad days a laugh is forced.
On bad days it's hard to find any good in anything, in anyone.
But it's there just waiting to be found, to be reconised as the cure of any bad.
I walk to and from school and on bad days i try to take notice of everything.
How green the grass is and the constant crunch of the frost under my shoes.
How tall the trees are and how they sway in the wind.
How the colour of the leaves drift and twirl in the wind gracefully but surely plumeting towards the ground to graze their death bed before the morning walkers trample their way to unknown destinations.
I try to take notice of the cracked pavement and all the storys and all the journeys they have to tell and how they still manage to stick together, to get through these bad days.
When i see people......... horrible horrible people.
Humans over all. It upsets me.
People careless, irrisponsable, inconsiderate people. This if you look carefully to find it could get anyone down.
But these realisations come easily to me, so i try to take notice of the good points in them.
The way their cheeks flush in the morning cold.
The way their eyes study the things surrounding them.
The way their breath comes out in an illistrated huff of smoke in this frosty time of day that only signifys that their heart is not fully made of stone.
That they are only human.
That we are all only human, and much much more.
(p4)
Lizzy wrote: "I love all your writing. You should read my fanfiction. I have them all on my profile and I believe they're in my writing folder too, but if not, i'm gonna start posting in there. It's been a while..."Thank you. I appreciate it a lot!!!
Lizzy wrote: "You're very welcome."Thank you!!! i appreciate it!! :)
hey guys for anyone who is interested- (BE INTERESTED!!!!!! Please!!!)- im going to try and post a new peice of writing after school - it was this assignment my enlish teacher asked us to do last year using the topic "my special place" and its about my dog...... she died...... :( but when i finished it, everytime i tride to read it to the class i cried... it was embarrising. I hope you read it, I hope you like it, I hope you want to read more of my writing- and please if you can be bothered i hope you comment
The piece of writing- "My special place" is a result of a teachers instructions to write about where your personal special place is- mine is where my best friend is buried........ for gypsy- i miss you baby<3written in 2014
My special place.
................
When I was a few months old I had a best friend, she still is. Yes she is a dog but no ordinary one indeed. She was the same age, the same hair colour, and the the same personality. We did everything together. From memories, I can imagine we were rewarded together, even got in trouble together. She was the best friend ever.
She listened to me when I was angry and didn't comment. She fell asleep on my lap warm and cute when I was sad. She would keep me company when I was lonely. She was so forgiving, she always was. From me patting her on her head too hard, to pulling her tail until she yelped. She was so loyal, not as in running away and creating mischief, but her protecting us from the bad people. Playing big dog at home. Being a mummy to our pups. She was so loyal as in when she ran away and was naughty, she always came home. She was a piglet, my piglet, she was my best friend.
But a while ago she got bowel cancer and we didn't know until a couple a weeks before her passing. The vet tried to take it out, but she was too old to heal after the surgery was done. She wouldn't consume anything, food and water, and she was throwing up what was left. So they opened her back up to see what the matter was. But to find out she was rotting from the inside out. So they put her down, and she wasn't in pain anymore.
Now there is a place, my place, where I go when emotions get the better of me. My warm, sunny, happy place where she was burried. My purple tree, which we named Gypsy.
(p5)
Rubyfirewoods12=^.^= wrote: "O.OWow." wow as in good or bad??
Hi Alia! Messaging about all your posts to date...
Very heart felt, of course, and some of your structure makes it even more so. Poetic rather than story telling, such as, "But to find out she was rotting from the inside out." (Also, I don't know why, but your writing reminds me of sci fi. Can't pin point it though. Random thought, hence the parentheses.)
I would agree that spelling and punctuation are important, especially if it distracts from being able to understand your meaning or context. However, too much correction, particularly grammar corrections, might take away from the impact of your writing and some of the flow.
I recently went to a writing conference and read a book by a publisher that both stated publishers prefer working with "right brained" creative type authors who left the editing to the professionals. Those "left brained" authors may have great technical sentence structure, but often they are the least imaginative and the writing content and word play suffer.
I think it's best to seek a balance, but when in doubt... just write! Keep that left brain away and just let the creativity flow. You can always go back and do some clean up - first drafts almost always need clean up anyway, no matter who is writing. If the creativity and word/sentence arrangement aren't there then we'd all we'd be left with are technical manuals. :-)
Hope you keep writing!
Mod
Wow." wow as in good or bad??"
Wow as in good! :)
Rubyfirewoods12=^.^= wrote: "Alia wrote: "Rubyfirewoods12=^.^= wrote: "O.OWow." wow as in good or bad??"
Wow as in good! :)"
Thank you! im so glad you liked it :) :D and thenks so much for telling me what you think about it.
I have a new poem for you guys, I really hope you like it. As do a lot of people I have a few troubles in life that tend to hold me back on things that for other people might seem easy - and I also have things that I probably take for granted and that a lot of people would do anything for, but hey that's life and the best thing we can do if we have the chance is- if you Can make your problem better for you or for someone else, that in some way can make a difference - like letting your ideas, thoughts and feelings out instead of letting them boil away inside you then that's great. E.g writing. Okay I know........ I'm rambling on but the point is theres a couple of sayings that I love and I think they are said like this "fake it till you make it"
And "If you can't beat 'em join 'em". So if you have a 'con' that you can make into a 'pro' then why wouldent you try to benefit from that? That takes me to the saying "the glass isn't half empty it's half full' I have a promlem with anxiety and depression and for me that's a 'con' but some times i can mould it into a 'pro' with my writing I get my feelings out in a healthy way, I do it using intelligence and experience and truth, I do it using my hobbie - using my past, present and what I wish for my future. People like my writing they tell me that they connect to the pictures my words create, and people have told me that a topic that the best salesman has been taught to pitch is sold in one sentence of my mind - and that makes a difference. How I make my 'con' a 'pro' is in the middle of that 'con' I just tell the world in my own words the things I am unable to Tell people in person. So here's my heart it's battered and bruised but it's still beating and if you try to break it using a 'con' I'm just going to come back stronger and this is how it comes to 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger'
I hope you enjoy this one guys :) Written in 2014
A box of secrets
.................................
A box of secrets lay buried, hidden deep down and yet it's right in front of you hidden to the naked blind eye.
It's there in the mid summer storm and it's there in the long windy desert roads and you don't see it.
It's there in every cloud, in every star and its there in every breath.
The suffercater. The mind controller. The hot and cold flush.
Hidden deep down but still in plain sight.
The fight, the tears, the little nail biter.
The hug, the wisdom, the laughter, the kiss, the memory's.
The mask of makeup that we all wear.
It's the thing. It's the thing that makes you hollow - emotionless.
Not angry, not happy, not sad, not lonely but empty.
Empty and only that.
That feeling of madness...... Encreased by everyone's loud spoken opinions about you.
The thought of the possible one day that it all might just fit.
Two balloon ties tying you here. Three. Four.
The voices all around you that are overwhelming are also the voice of your home.
The wait, the ice, the fire, the love.
The bottomless demolishing pit that consumes you untill you find that hand to hold, your passion.
The one thing in the world your almost positive will never change.
The thing that comforts you, that makes you see the light.
The life preserver.
The only thing that finishes the messed up puzzle that is you.
(p6)
That is amazing. I am stunned on how well you write. It's so awesome! I also suffer of depression and anxiety and I write poems about it. But At the end it has never happy. My poems are usually about suicide, depression, self-harm etc... I think I could learn from how you turn 'cons' to 'pros'. I think your really talented with your writing. I could only wish to be at talented as you are. :)
Hi Alia!!First of all, I agree with all the rest. Some people say writing is like giving someone a piece of your soul, I'm pretty sure anyone who reads this thinks the same of your writing. That said, keep writing and pressing forward. I think you have talent and can definitely write and produce inspiring pieces. The hardest thing about writing, however, is that we tend to underestimate ourselves, and it's one of the most destructive mindsets around. Don't underestimate yourself. Keep writing, keep inspiring people, keep it from the heart, and you'll go farther than you can imagine. -Emmeline 'Emma'
Lindsey wrote: "That is amazing. I am stunned on how well you write. It's so awesome! I also suffer of depression and anxiety and I write poems about it. But At the end it has never happy. My poems are usually abo..."Thank you so much! And I think we can learn a lot from each other we both share a problem, we both share a talent, we both share a hobby, and I think that we can learn from each other - two minds are better than one.
Eммelιɴe wrote: "Hi Alia!!First of all, I agree with all the rest. Some people say writing is like giving someone a piece of your soul, I'm pretty sure anyone who reads this thinks the same of your writing. That ..."
I'm so glad you commented and that you like it! I really really appreciate it! I really hope you keep reading my up coming writting in the future and tell me what you think about it.
Hey guys you know how we all have those bad days sometimes and we think anything and everything is going wrong - sometimes when I have those days I have a theme song playing in my head all day infinitely making it more dramatic. the most common song Iv had on those days is the lazy song by Bruno mars but the song is always distorted and wrong and so what I do if I can is - I write! I get a couple of words in my mind and I create a story around it- when I'm writing I don't even think it just flows out of me and meets the paper almost like someone beyond my years and experience is talking through me and it feels great. When I think about it sometimes these problems that are causing me difficulty arnt really problems! I might just being looking at them from the wrong angle - like walking around cross eyed and confused why I'm all dizzy - in the end I get good things out of these problems! I get a event filled life instead of a dull one, I get a talent and a hobby and a chance to make a difference and create something with my life - because it's created in the essence, with my thoughts and feelings and events that make my life and without them I wouldent be me! Being me Is all I can be. When I get emotional I create art! My writing it not only helps me it gives me a better veiw on the world the more and more I read it over and over. It helps other people in my situation because the world does not revole around me and there are other people who are in the same position as me and who have been dealt even worse cards. So I hope you like the levels of the feelings in my writing
Alia, you made my morning. Refreshing take on life. "The world doesn't revolve around me". You don't hear that often. If we all realize that life revolves around each other then our world would be more gratifying. Until then let's keep articulating our feelings so they light the way for future generations.
Daniel wrote: "Alia, you made my morning. Refreshing take on life. "The world doesn't revolve around me". You don't hear that often. If we all realize that life revolves around each other then our world would be ..."Thank you :) im real glad you like it! I hope to hear your thoughts on my future writting posts.
Hi guys this is a poem about when you feel the absence of a feeling or a emotion and your just waiting to feel something again because without it you feel like your not you any more. The truth is that in life you will have good and bad times and feel all different types of emotions but to be human it means you have to have a balance you can't entirely be one thing because you are made up of millions of things and inside those things are a million more. living a normal life is like being a living scale on a roller coaster! A scale of good, bad, intelligence, feelings, emotions and things that make you human - but more importantly that make you, you - but when your on a roller coaster your going up and down, up and down and we all know that what goes up must come down so that leaves us thinking how am I going to get back up again? The answer is you get out of that cart and start walking. You may feel like you have no one who understands, cares or wants to help you but the fact is that there is always someone who does, someone who sees you even if you can't see them and if your still not happy with that then walk a bit faster and keep searching untill you find them! Some of the best things are the things you have to work for but if you didn't have to work for them would you really want them anyway? Thanks guys. This was written in 2015Little light something
.............................................
My little paper weight, it's purpose blurry but still so clear.
The thing that it's made for, the thing that it's best at holds down something so very light and just as breakable.
Little paper weight without you my little light something would surely be blown away in even the slightest of winds.
And without my little light something I'm only the little paper weight and no longer have a purpose.
And as the more time passes my memory of you fades.
I still remember you little light something but it's hard because you don't have a name.
You don't have a shape and you don't make a sound.
I can't see you or smell you but I know when your around.
I miss you little light something and the part that you played in my life but there is something you should know.
It gets harder at night when it's quiet and your absence makes even the hottest things cold.
I can't sleep, I cant breath and so you leave me to my sorrows.
Come back little light something your a part of me and I need you.
If your still gone in the morning when the sun has risen and the air is crisp I'll get out my list and start it again.
I'll wait for you little light something but I won't wait in vain.
(p7)
^ Nice job, Alia. I love your last line!
I will be tuning in Alia. I am intrigued. Keep up the work!!
WOW! That's really deep. I like it!
Wow, I love the last one! Great job, you are very talented.
Eммelιɴe wrote: "^ Nice job, Alia. I love your last line!"Thank you, when i wrote this i had a feeling that this one would be special but when i was finished and was reading it over i realised it was a pretty great one because it holds so much more meaning than i noticed when i was writing it
Daniel wrote: "I will be tuning in Alia. I am intrigued. Keep up the work!!"Awesome, thank you :)
Ravanna wrote: "WOW! That's really deep. I like it!"haahaha yes thank you, when i write i think it the only actual time that i am truly myself :)
Julane wrote: "Wow, I love the last one! Great job, you are very talented."Thank you! i hope you will tell me what you think about my future posts :)
I still have more poems to post but before that I would love for people to give me some suggestions about a particular word, sentence or topic and I will try to create something out of it :) I would really love it if you put your idea in! :) :D
hey guys this is probably my favourite poem that I've ever written. its about my dog, and how after she died I had all these depressing feelings and I used to think that I could never move on or let pain and anger go, I went through a stage where I wouldn't do anything that would make me happy because I thought she would think I had just forgotten her. But I had to let my feelings out and what better way than to praise her life and explain to my self that if I stop my world because shes found a bew one then its not living and that woul be a very sad thing to waste seeing as she gave so much and still had so much to give but wasnt even given the chance. So here's to Gypsy- you will always be my hero, I feel like nobody understands who I really am but you always did you knew me better than I ever did or ever will. Written in 2014Guardian angel
................
When you know her days are numbered you try to be better.
You try to be the type of person that would make her never forget you.
Even in after-life, wherever that may be, just know that she'll always love you.
You don't have to forget her, but you do have to set her free.
To make sure she is happy and content, you have to set her free.
No matter how hard that may be.
If you don't let her be, you'll never be happy.
And that's all she ever wanted in life was to see you smile, just to see you laugh that can be heard from a mile.
If you don't let her go to find a better place, away from this world and all it's digrace, you'll never move on, your life will be like horror and sad movies in slow-motion.
And it doesn't change the fact that in life and in after-life she never wants you to be unhappy.
So don't feel guilty when you smile or laugh, like you are betraying her somehow, like it could change the past.
Don't feel bad if you make a new friend, have a great day or eat an icecream.
Don't feel bad if you forget to water her tree, or visit her regularly.
Don't feel guilty when you get a new pet, a bird or a cat or even a new best friend.
You could never replace her, and she knows that. It will never be the same without her and nothing can change that.
What would help both of you move on, is to live your life. Live a little, live a lot.
Don't live your life like a rusty robot. What would make her proud, is to do your best to never give up, to try new things.
To love, laugh, and enjoy life.
To live life like she would, if she was still here. To take all opportunities in both hands.
Because while life may not be understood, some people take it for granted, but that doesn't mean you should.
I am not saying you have to be perfect and can do all of those things, all you have to do is try and try harder and see what life brings.
(p8)
Julia wrote: "Pretty good! I'm sorry your dog died."thank you! she died in 2013 but it always feel like forever ago and just yesterday because shes been in my life since before i could even sit on my own.............
i appreciate your comment :D
this is something i like about life..:)
Ashwini wrote: "this is something i like about life..:)"thanks you im glad you liked it :)
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Write, Wrote, Written
Books mentioned in this topic
Journey from Guwahati to Machhiwara (other topics)Journey from Guwahati to Machhiwara (other topics)
p.s im sorry about my spelling