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Wanderer's Journal
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(last edited Jun 12, 2015 02:18PM)
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Jun 04, 2015 02:46PM
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05/06/2015
I had a photography trip today where we had to go around the city and look at buildings and design ideas for sculptures to be put in that space. It was interesting but since i went last year as well I couldnt speak because i already knew what we were going to do so and i had to let other people answer lol. Then i went on the tube and it was really hot and cramped inside the train. This guy was asleep in the seat next to me and there was this awkward moment when his head fell onto my shoulder and I didnt know how to get him off so I stayed like that until I came to my stop. I had to cough really loudly for him to wake up, really awkward. I was so tired when i came home and because I'd been walking all day i had blisters on my feet. What i wanted was to go to sleep but my mum started screaming at me so i couldnt...
I don't know why people bother to have kids. They're just bringing innocent beings into this fucked up generation. They're gonna make their kids suffer and in my experience after you reach over the age of 10 parents stop caring. Sure they raise you and shit but they beat you and insulted you and made you feel like you were a fucking piece of crap. When you were old enough to realise that what they were doing was wrong and could go to the police anytime to report the abuse. But you don't because you think your younger siblings still need and mum and dad to look after them at least until you come to the age when you can support them. At least now they just direct their anger at you so they don't have to take the fall. Its unfair but you learn to hide your scars and bruises and sooner or later you get used to it and stop caring altogether.
07/06/2015
The funfair was so crap. Nuff said.
The funfair was so crap. Nuff said.
I remember the time I used to have more than 1 best friend and they were girls. there were five of us and we became really close. We even did all that best friend crap where we made friendship bracelets and promised we would always be there for each other. Back then we were so fucking naive and we stayed together for 6 years until secondary school started. It was like a chain reaction. First one person leaves and the others follow. Until it's me and one other person left. She soon left me as well. But now three years later I want her back, more than anything. Its really pathetic. Even though she caused me so much pain and used me. People cant use you if you dont let them. But i did let her use me so that must mean something...
I hate all my classes in school. I barely know any of the people in my new lessons except for maths and english. And I have maths twice in one day and altogether seven maths lessons in one week. I'm dying because of this omg. I dont think I'll survive year 10 fml
Am I wrong to think the worlds got it in for me
And am I right to say I'm longing for some sympathy
See I feel a sound, but I can't hear it
That's my heart strings getting played like a symphony
Yo, you know you turned me insane
Why you staring at window when I'm the one with the pain
You know you set me off the rails
And you'll be to blame
If you ever hear
I jumped in front of the train we're both fucked in the brain
08/06/15
I got another visit from the police last night and tbh I'm sick of seeig them hanging around my area. My family is in so much trouble and everything is so fucked up. It's only the second week back to school and I managed to get myself a week of detention and I have to do community service. This is just great. I hate everything.
My therapist sees me as a 'misunderstood kid' -_-
I havent gone to my sessions for months and thats not what i wanted to hear. I dont even know why i bothered to go back. She doesnt help me in anyway. Its not like i dont listen to her. When she suggested that i do gardening as a calming activity i actually did it bit there were slugs... so i gave up. At least i tried.
I havent gone to my sessions for months and thats not what i wanted to hear. I dont even know why i bothered to go back. She doesnt help me in anyway. Its not like i dont listen to her. When she suggested that i do gardening as a calming activity i actually did it bit there were slugs... so i gave up. At least i tried.
There's literally a police car parked outside my window
fuck
I cant even go anywhere
this sucks so much
I'm a tiny bit scared
fuck
I cant even go anywhere
this sucks so much
I'm a tiny bit scared
My photography teacher hates me. She's so fucking racist omf
she thinks I'm a terrorist and I'm gonna burn down the bloody school
She's white and she thinks all Asians are evil. Fuck her
She's so nice to all the other students but such a bitch to me. How is that fair?
she thinks I'm a terrorist and I'm gonna burn down the bloody school
She's white and she thinks all Asians are evil. Fuck her
She's so nice to all the other students but such a bitch to me. How is that fair?
Omg one of the HU songs it says 'my daughter has a little hope'
But i always hear it as 'my daughter is a little hoe' o_o
I think there's something wrong with my hearing lol
But i always hear it as 'my daughter is a little hoe' o_o
I think there's something wrong with my hearing lol
09/06/2015
I was so pissed with my history teacher this morning because we're doing ww2 and ugh he couldnt bloody hear me. -_-
Him: what voting system did the germans use?
Me: proportional representation
Him: anyone at all?
Me: proportional representation
Him: It begins with p and r
Me: ITS PROPORTIONAL REPRESENTATION
Him: what did you say?
Me: -_-
Im quiet in class but srsly im not that quiet. But he did call my parents to say i was doing well in GCSE history and he thinks I'll get the A grade so he's forgiven.
I think what I'm most sensitive about is my writing. I'm pretty good with facts and information so thats not a problem but when it comes to me writing about myself or some story i get all self conscious. Right now I'm working on a story but i havent shown anyone because I'm afraid they won't like it and say it's shit or something like that. I'd probably go into a corner and cry for hours if anyone said something nad about my writing.
One day in English i had a huge hangover so I didnt write as well as i normally would and my English really made me feel like poop. I was literally in tears after she finished saying how a reception kid could write better than i could.
One day in English i had a huge hangover so I didnt write as well as i normally would and my English really made me feel like poop. I was literally in tears after she finished saying how a reception kid could write better than i could.
But her criticism helped me a lot. Even though i didn't like it, she did help me improve in my mocks and I got the highest grade in my class ;3
But now she's going to go on maternity leave and I'm just liek noooo Dx
I need her to be a bitch to me so I can get better.
I need her to be a bitch to me so I can get better.
In RE my teacher brought my E grade up to an A
And now she's leaving too Dx so I'll probably get a U grade in my next test fml
10/06/2015
Today i went to the zoo and it wasnt half bad. I normally dont like animals but the tigers and snakes were really good to look at. The giraffes were awesome and so were the penguins xc. Emus were kind of boring and hippos were non existent xD Kangaroos were reallllly interesting. Two of them got into a fight it was great. Meerkats were the best tho.
Oh and monkeys but whenever i tried to take a picture of them they flashed their asses xD
Meerkats tho. They were like the only animals that actually came up to us and posed while we took pictures so cute omf
omg I almost forgot. when we were coming back this girl just ran across the road while the cars were still moving and she almost got hit but she was being chased by these two other guys and she got caught by them. Apparently she had shoplifted and the two guys were undercover police and she was arrested and taken. someone recorded all this and put it on snapchat xD
It's posing!
And look how tiny it is compared to the leg xD
And look how tiny it is compared to the leg xD
Soooo fucking adorable :oo XD
1:Is there a boy/girl in your life?
Romantically speaking, nope but I do have crushes
2:Think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them?
No
3:What do you think of when you hear the word “meow?”
Here kitty, kitty
4:What’s something you really want right now?
Um… Nothing really
5:Are you afraid of falling in love?
Yes, and no. If I thought it was possible for me to fall in love, I’d be afraid of it.
6:Do you like the beach?
I'm a city kid... I've only been a few times when I was a kid but yeah I liked it
7:Have you ever slept on a couch with someone else?
Yeah, a couple of times.
8:What’s the background on your cell?
The lock screen is the omega sign, my home screen is a broken tree
9:Name the last four beds you were sat on?
Mine, My mum's, Lee's, Jay's
10:Do you like your phone?
It does what’s it’s meant to so yeah, I guess
11:Honestly, are things going the way you planned?
Not at all
12:Who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?
Um… I have no idea…
13:Would you rather have a poodle or a Rottweiler?
I don't like dogs but Rottweiler
14:Which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?
Um… I don’t know really. Physical pain hurts more because emotional pain, it’s not really pain as such… It’s hard to explain but I guess… I don’t know, maybe they’re equal, just different.
15:Would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?
Zoo, mostly because I think most of the art I’ve seen at museums has been shit
16:Are you tired?
Extremely
17:How long have you known your 1st phone contact?
Is that the first contact I added or the first in my contacts list? My first contact I added was my mum I've known her my whole life. The first number in my contact list is Adam and I've known him since year 8.
18:Are they a relative?
My mum yeah
19:Would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes?
Only have one ex and probably not but I wouldn't mind
20:When did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with?
Today after school
21:If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today?
I don’t know, probably not
22:Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Yeah
23:How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now?
one
24:Is there a certain quote you live by?
Not really
25:What’s on your mind?
Drinking my coffee before it goes cold
26:Do you have any tattoos?
Nope
27:What is your favorite color?
Black
28:Next time you will kiss someone on the lips?
No idea
29:Who are you texting?
Nobody at the moment
30:Think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch?
Yes
31:Have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right?
Yes
32:Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?
About certain things, yes
33:Do you think anyone has feelings for you?
No
34:Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?
Someone has
35:Say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?
We're not serious
36:Were you single on Valentines Day?
Yes
37:Are you friends with the last person you kissed?
Yeah I guess so. We're more teammates since we're in martial arts together
38:What do your friends call you?
Depends on when they met me
39:Has anyone upset you in the last week?
Yes
40:Have you ever cried over a text?
Yes
41:Where’s your last bruise located?
My arm
42:What is it from?
A guy punched me in martial arts
43:Last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad?
Now?
44:Who was the last person you were on the phone with?
My best friend
45:Do you have a favourite pair of shoes?
I don’t really care about shoes, but I do like my current pair of boots
46:Do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day?
I wear beanies not hats
47:Would you ever go bald if it was the style?
I don’t give a shit about ‘the style’.
48:Do you make supper for your family?
No
49:Does your bedroom have a door?
Yes
50:Top 3 web-pages?
Tumblr, dj plug, Gr idk
51:Do you know anyone who hates shopping?
Me
52:Does anything on your body hurt?
My arm because of the bruise
53:Are goodbyes hard for you?
Depends on the person and reason
54:What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?
Um… idk
55:How is your hair?
A mess
56:What do you usually do first in the morning?
Have a cigarette
57:Do you think two people can last forever?
It’s a nice thought, and I think so, but it’s more likely they won’t
58:Think back to January 2007, were you single?
Yes
59:Green or purple grapes?
Purple
60:When’s the next time you will give someone a BIG hug?
I don’t like hugs so I don’t know
61:Do you wish you were somewhere else right now?
I always do
62:When will be the next time you text someone?
I don’t know
63:Where will you be 5 hours from now?
Here in my room as always sleeping maybe
64:What were you doing at 8 this morning.
Wishing it wasn't 8 AM
65:This time last year, can you remember who you liked?
No one
66:Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?
Not really
67:Did you kiss or hug anyone today?
No
68:What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?
I don’t wanna sleep
69:Have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?
Yes
70:How many windows are open on your computer?
Three
71:How many fingers do you have?
Eight and two thumbs
72:What is your ringtone?
Turkey burgers by Midi Mafia
73:How old will you be in 5 months?
Same age I am now
74:Where is your Mum right now?
In the kitchen
75:Why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love?
Because he's moved on and now that I'm older I've realised that it wasn't the romantic kind of love between us.
76:Have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?
No
77:Are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?
Yeah
78:Do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7?
Didn’t have a crush in year 7
79:Is there anyone you know with the name Mike?
Several
80:Have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?
A few times
81:How many people have you liked in the past three months?
Two
82:Has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?
No
83:Will you talk to the person you like tonight?
No
84:You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?
That is an unlikely scenario, but if it were to happen, I suppose I’d probably be with my ex friend.
85:If your BF/GF was into drugs would you care?
Yes
86:What was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie?
Um… When we came out I sparked up a cigarette but it was raining so I decided to go through the underground carpark where there was no smoking allowed so I had to try and hide the fact that I had a lit cigarette… It wasn’t exactly subtle but nobody seemed to care
87:Who was your last received call from?
A number I don’t know, I ignored it
88:If someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?
No
89:What is something you wish you had more of?
Dunno… confidence maybe?
90:Have you ever trusted someone too much?
Many times
91:Do you sleep with your window open?
Yes otherwise my room gets really stuffy
92:Do you get along with girls?
Depends on the girl
93:Are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?
No
94:Does sex mean love?
No
95:You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?
Not at all
96:Have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring?
Can’t remember
97:Did you sleep alone this week?
Yes
98:Everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you?
I guess
99:Do you believe in love at first sight?
Not really
100:Who was the last person that you pinky promised?
I can’t remember
5 reasons to be my friend:
1)
2)
3)
4)
5) I'll take you home when you're drunk
My chill level: no fucking chill and don't give a fuck about that
According to my sign I am:
- sleep deprived
- a loyal bitch
- intelligent
- irritable and cute
- when something goes wrong I question my decisions
- the reason I'm still single is because I never really smile and look scary a lot
- i feel inadequate a lot
- I work hard to show others that i am capable of doing things by myself
- my worst flaw is that I'm too opportunistic??
- i listen to music all the time
- I'm not popular but cool as hell when you meet me
- I would be Mr Krabs if i was a character in SpongeBob
- i wont tell you my feelings for 10 billion years and pressure you to sahre yours
- my favourite thing is coffee
- I'm good at keeping secrets
- If i was a kiss then i would be a french kiss
- the most beautiful feature about me is my bone structure
- i will tell you to fuck off if you got a better test result than me
- I'm allergic to vacations
- I'm part of the genius squad, procrascination squad and emotion hider squad
- and also "fuck with me get ready for your funeral" squad
- i have a fear of not being good enough
- the amount of fucks i give is 1+6-3+14
- i spend my money on food
- I'm an ambitious bitch
- easy to annoy
- instead of sass I got fucking class oh yea
- if i was a weather then I would be a thunderstorm
- what I want is world peace
- my kindness is beautiful
- I'm easily angered
- I'm afraid of disorganisation
- abstract, deep thinking, mysterious, frugal, sensible
- part of "do it I fucking dare you" squad and "you'll never know if i actually like you squad
I thought only South Africans use WhatsApp xD
Nah whatsapp is the easiest way to talk to people here
Yea, there's like not one person who doesn't have it here
Who doesnt have whatsapp? It was like the first thing I installed when I got my phone
When I don't have pockets or a bag with me and I've got money with me I put it in my shoe.
I dont get why some girls put it in their bra.
