Over the years, I've witnessed my students completely transform their lives and reshape their careers. I'll be honest with you; a lot of times it ain't pretty. But then again, change never is. When you commit to changing your career for the better, you can expect to go through quite a learning curve on your way to success. That's just what change looks like. It's messy. It's uncomfortable. It's awkward and it doesn't necessarily feel good. Change brings a lot of stuff to the surface, that's for sure. Change also creates an enormous feeling of impatience because you just want the results, not all the uncomfortable gunk that comes with it.
Change itself is not linear or orderly or precise. You're moving into uncharted territory, so expect some bumps and bruises along the way. That's change for ya! But you can't accomplish your long-term career vision without change. You must be willing to change and be patient during the process in order to make your wildest dreams come true. So, how about it? Are you ready to change for a change?
Let me share a secret with you to help you deal with change a little more gracefully. It's called psycho-cybernetics and it's more than just a Scrabble-winning word. Psycho-cybernetics essentially explains why change is so tough. When you understand it, you'll be able to embrace the process of change more easily.
A cybernetic mechanism is a little doohickey designed to maintain the status quo of a particular environment such as a filter in a fish tank or a thermostat in a room. If your bedroom thermostat is set at seventy-one degrees and you open the windows one fine November morning, the heat will kick into high gear keeping the room's temperature at the standard seventy-one degrees. That's just the thermostat, or cybernetic mechanism doing its job.
You've got your own thermostat and it's called a psycho-cybernetic mechanism. Its sole purpose is to maintain whatever temperature (or comfort level) you are used to, even if your comfort level is not the most desirable of circumstances. So, if you've always been broke, your thermostat is set at "broke." If you've never booked a guest-star role, your thermostat is set at "no guest-stars." This means that when you begin to make changes, your psycho-cybernetic mechanism will kick in and attempt to prevent the temperature change within you.
Your thermostat is very advanced and it will do whatever it takes to maintain the temperature at which it's been programmed. So when you begin to change your personal temperature, you can expect the heat to blast down on you. That's the process of change. Never fear, though, because just like a thermostat in a room, you can alter the setting of your internal thermostat. It takes a little effort and a lot of patience, but it is indeed possible.
The next time you experience impatience or frustration with your progress, celebrate it rather than jump ship. That discomfort is just your psycho-cybernetic mechanism kicking in which means change is on the way. Just sit tight and understand that change is not linear. You're not failing; you're changing. If you can hang on through the discomfort of change you will ultimately reprogram your internal thermostat to match the future life you want for yourself.
What You Resist, Persists Now that you know all about psycho-cybernetics, let's take a look at resistance itself. Resistance is that strong force that slows your progress down. Sometimes it might be an anxious or fearful feeling. Sometimes, it might look like bad luck. Resistance might be an excuse you make or an objection you have. Resistance may seem silly or make a lot of sense. Resistance is fear, procrastination, laziness, business, and insecurity. Any way you slice it, resistance just works to keep you from living the life you desire.
Resistance can be powerful, even paralyzing, but it is a natural occurrence for every actor, or human being for that matter. A lot of my clients want to figure out why they resist certain actions or where their resistance originates. Though this can be valuable information, it's not essential to overcoming resistance itself. You can spend a lot of energy exploring the resistance or you can use that same energy to take action and overcome whatever thought, feelings, or distractions that might hold you back.
Resistance is natural. It shows up when you're about to do something new or something important to you. You don't have to be free of resistance completely before you take action. You don't have to fight your resistance before you can get where you want to go. You don't have to judge yourself just because you feel resistance. Instead, you can be grateful for the strong emotions reminding you that what you are about to do matters to you.
When you're nervous before an audition or performance, it's not a sign that you're some sort of amateur. It's actually a sign that you care about the outcome. When you don't really feel like putting up that difficult scene in class, you're no chicken. You're probably excited about the challenge or nervous about the risk. When you avoid finishing projects, you're not lazy. You're just unsure of what might come next. Nerves are natural, so is resistance.
So, what do you do with your resistance? Do you fight it or judge it? Do you allow it to distract you from the important steps you could be taking? Or do you use that energy to catapult yourself to new heights? You can feel resistance without succumbing to it.
Did you know that your body experiences fear and excitement in the same way? The goose bumps, the rolling stomach, the sweaty palms, and the rapid heartbeat are all signs of fear as much as they are of excitement. Picture something that really scares you such as calling an agent, performing stand-up -- anything will do. Now, notice the physical response in your body. Notice your breathing, your heart rate; notice which parts of your body get tense and alert.
Next, picture something that really excites you, like winning an Oscar or working with Ron Howard. Notice the physical response in your body now. You'll find it's pretty much the same. Though your body can't tell the difference between fear and excitement, your mind sure seems to think it can. When you label an emotion as fear, you are bound to experience resistance, which ultimately distracts you from the task at hand.
Robert Heller said, "Fear is excitement without breath." So the next time you feel fear or resistance, thank your body for showing you that this thing you fear is important to you then reframe the fear as excitement and take the action anyway. Use that energy to keep you moving rather than keep you stuck. Resistance is a gift, so feel the fear and do it anyway.
Change itself is not linear or orderly or precise. You're moving into uncharted territory, so expect some bumps and bruises along the way. That's change for ya! But you can't accomplish your long-term career vision without change. You must be willing to change and be patient during the process in order to make your wildest dreams come true. So, how about it? Are you ready to change for a change?
Let me share a secret with you to help you deal with change a little more gracefully. It's called psycho-cybernetics and it's more than just a Scrabble-winning word. Psycho-cybernetics essentially explains why change is so tough. When you understand it, you'll be able to embrace the process of change more easily.
A cybernetic mechanism is a little doohickey designed to maintain the status quo of a particular environment such as a filter in a fish tank or a thermostat in a room. If your bedroom thermostat is set at seventy-one degrees and you open the windows one fine November morning, the heat will kick into high gear keeping the room's temperature at the standard seventy-one degrees. That's just the thermostat, or cybernetic mechanism doing its job.
You've got your own thermostat and it's called a psycho-cybernetic mechanism. Its sole purpose is to maintain whatever temperature (or comfort level) you are used to, even if your comfort level is not the most desirable of circumstances. So, if you've always been broke, your thermostat is set at "broke." If you've never booked a guest-star role, your thermostat is set at "no guest-stars." This means that when you begin to make changes, your psycho-cybernetic mechanism will kick in and attempt to prevent the temperature change within you.
Your thermostat is very advanced and it will do whatever it takes to maintain the temperature at which it's been programmed. So when you begin to change your personal temperature, you can expect the heat to blast down on you. That's the process of change. Never fear, though, because just like a thermostat in a room, you can alter the setting of your internal thermostat. It takes a little effort and a lot of patience, but it is indeed possible.
The next time you experience impatience or frustration with your progress, celebrate it rather than jump ship. That discomfort is just your psycho-cybernetic mechanism kicking in which means change is on the way. Just sit tight and understand that change is not linear. You're not failing; you're changing. If you can hang on through the discomfort of change you will ultimately reprogram your internal thermostat to match the future life you want for yourself.
What You Resist, Persists
Now that you know all about psycho-cybernetics, let's take a look at resistance itself. Resistance is that strong force that slows your progress down. Sometimes it might be an anxious or fearful feeling. Sometimes, it might look like bad luck. Resistance might be an excuse you make or an objection you have. Resistance may seem silly or make a lot of sense. Resistance is fear, procrastination, laziness, business, and insecurity. Any way you slice it, resistance just works to keep you from living the life you desire.
Resistance can be powerful, even paralyzing, but it is a natural occurrence for every actor, or human being for that matter. A lot of my clients want to figure out why they resist certain actions or where their resistance originates. Though this can be valuable information, it's not essential to overcoming resistance itself. You can spend a lot of energy exploring the resistance or you can use that same energy to take action and overcome whatever thought, feelings, or distractions that might hold you back.
Resistance is natural. It shows up when you're about to do something new or something important to you. You don't have to be free of resistance completely before you take action. You don't have to fight your resistance before you can get where you want to go. You don't have to judge yourself just because you feel resistance. Instead, you can be grateful for the strong emotions reminding you that what you are about to do matters to you.
When you're nervous before an audition or performance, it's not a sign that you're some sort of amateur. It's actually a sign that you care about the outcome. When you don't really feel like putting up that difficult scene in class, you're no chicken. You're probably excited about the challenge or nervous about the risk. When you avoid finishing projects, you're not lazy. You're just unsure of what might come next. Nerves are natural, so is resistance.
So, what do you do with your resistance? Do you fight it or judge it? Do you allow it to distract you from the important steps you could be taking? Or do you use that energy to catapult yourself to new heights? You can feel resistance without succumbing to it.
Did you know that your body experiences fear and excitement in the same way? The goose bumps, the rolling stomach, the sweaty palms, and the rapid heartbeat are all signs of fear as much as they are of excitement. Picture something that really scares you such as calling an agent, performing stand-up -- anything will do. Now, notice the physical response in your body. Notice your breathing, your heart rate; notice which parts of your body get tense and alert.
Next, picture something that really excites you, like winning an Oscar or working with Ron Howard. Notice the physical response in your body now. You'll find it's pretty much the same. Though your body can't tell the difference between fear and excitement, your mind sure seems to think it can. When you label an emotion as fear, you are bound to experience resistance, which ultimately distracts you from the task at hand.
Robert Heller said, "Fear is excitement without breath." So the next time you feel fear or resistance, thank your body for showing you that this thing you fear is important to you then reframe the fear as excitement and take the action anyway. Use that energy to keep you moving rather than keep you stuck. Resistance is a gift, so feel the fear and do it anyway.