Jane Austen discussion
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Places for figuratively teaming up and slapping characters we dislike!
message 51:
by
Anna
(new)
Nov 19, 2012 04:34PM
Hey Wickham! I have something very important to tell you. You may think that you are just amazing and so handsome and clever but the fact of the matter is that you stole Georgina Darcy's innocence with very few words but you ruined her and now you think that you can go on ruining people's lives because it's all in the sake of fun..well think again! You deserve to be exiled from this country for good and here's a parting word for you! *speaks gently and then reached the end, slaps him upside the head* Take that! for both Lydia Bennet and Georgina Darcy! They never did deserve you! *flounces off*
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Bravo Anna! *hi fives as Anna flounces past**Drops ribbon rack on Wickham's head*
LOL, that right Anna. *High fives you after Becca*
Ummm..thanks you guys! Marren, my name is Anna and not Anne. I have my eye on you, Wickham *points finger and narrows eyes at Wickham*
My apologizes Anna
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*joins in the rounds of high fiving going on and then joins in the evils being given to Wickham*
*embarrassed, Wickham heads for the door, but *smack* I just happened to stick my photo out at that moment and trip him up - whoops! *smug face* *
*see's a note fallen out of Wickham's pocket, picks it up and looks like I'm going to give it to him, but then pull it away from him and open it, and start reading an embarrassing love letter from Lydia, laughing as Wickham goes red trying to pick himself up off the floor*
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*Wickham begins to protest and lunges for my reticule, and unfortunately knocks me down. I am extremely angry and hoping someone will retaliate.*
*laughs uncontrollably as Soph tantalizes Wickham, and then, when he knocks her over, pulls on the back of his belt so he falls again, tripping over the door frame to lie flat on his back. I deftly pull a handful of spare, tangled thread from my own reticule, and drop it in his open mouth, making him splutter. Extends a hand to help Soph up.* :D
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:D "over, well on Wickham," :D*walking arm in arm out of the shop, we see Caroline Bingley. We wave cheerfully, not allowing her to see the evil grins we are sharing*
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;) *I call out "hi Mr Darcy!" and giggle incessantly as she predictably spins around to look for him*
*Caroline's sudden stop and spin caught another gentleman off guard, and he trips over her, sending Caroline and numerous packages sprawling*
*Cari, secretly watching through a shop window, titters unashamedly. She spies two ladies walking up to Caroline Bingley trying to hide mischievous smiles and glances, but not quite succeeding....*
*Cari, secretly watching through a shop window, titters unashamedly. She spies two ladies walking up to Caroline Bingley trying to hide mischievous smiles and glances, but not quite succeeding....*
*I hear a titter and wink at Cari, before **accidentally** stumbling over one of the dropped parcels, and I unfortunately (:D) end up kicking it and it hits Caroline in the head - making her lovely hair-do come out*
(I just want to say that y'all are great! I'm really enjoying reading this thread! ;D )
Aerykah wrote: "(I just want to say that y'all are great! I'm really enjoying reading this thread! ;D )"(Haha, thanks, I love this thread too. Glad you are enjoying it! You should join in, it's fun making up inventive things to do to people. Lol.)
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Nice one Cari! Haha
I haven't finished with Willoughby...
*after spying Cari as well and preventing my laughter getting out of control when her hair falls down, I notice who the other gentlemen she knocked over was, no other than Mr Willoughby. Perfect *smiles naughtily**
*Motions to Soph as though we are going to go and help poor Caroline and Mr Willoughby up, but instead I roll Caroline and she rolls Willoughby through the dirty puddle right next to them on the street* :D
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"How dare yo .... "
*growing increasingly bored of this speech I signal to Becca and then, together in unison, we stomp on his feet, one each, turn on our heels, don't look back and stride off down the street, our heads held high.*
*Willoughby gapes after them, then roars in anger, waving his arms like a lunatic, before finally crumpling to the ground and throwing a temper tantrum.*
*Several officers come along and carts him away.*
*Cari, who had been watching everything that had been going on in the streets, laughs, and then leaves the shop, deciding to follow Soph and Becca to see what other adventures they might encounter.*
*Several officers come along and carts him away.*
*Cari, who had been watching everything that had been going on in the streets, laughs, and then leaves the shop, deciding to follow Soph and Becca to see what other adventures they might encounter.*
Hello ladies! has anyone seen Caroline? I have a speech to deliver!
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Anna, we left Caroline down the street ;) please go back to her!!
*As Becca and I see Willoughby being carted off we are very smug :) and we then notice Cari walking towards us and stop to allow her join in the adventures that we get up to.*
*once she has joined us again, we see Anna approaching Caroline once more - just as she has not quite had enough! - and decide to hover to see what happens (in a way to look as though we are not watching but at that same time making it clear to Caroline that we will see and enjoy her set down and embarrassment! ;) )*
Hello Caroline. Tell me do you like what you have done to your brother? did it cause you to feel better about yourself because you torn apart a love so very strong that was like a wound that never fully recovered. You thought that because Jane didn't appear like she was in love, you brought it on yourself to pull them apart! How could you do that? and to think that you consider yourself a better match to Darcy because of your rank and you act as if Lizzie Bennet is lower, lower than dirt itself...well, I tell you what Caroline! You are like dirt itself. You have ruined their love and I hope you have a conscience because if you don't...well, go to to hell!!! *slaps her upside the head and flounces away*
*I laugh quietly and sneak up behind Caroline, pulling all of her ribbons out of her hair in one quick motion. Soph and I turn around and walk back down the street, and then we see...*(Someone else can choose :) Good speech Anna, by the way)
(Thanks Becca. I am quite capital about making speeches. Let's see...the next one will be...John Thrope! I do delight in imagining myself slapping him silly).
:D What book is he from? I haven't read all of them.
So no one wanted to deal with Emma. haha, hmm. Well I am game for Lady Catherine.
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And sorry, I like Emma too much!!
I'm up for Collins - YEA! And Lady Catherine yea, but she does deserve dignity in her 'beating up' ;)
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Hmmmmmmm*I see Mr Collins walking out of a shop down the road, grin evilly at Soph, and then use an old handkerchief to pick up some mud and launch it neatly at the back of Mr Collin's tailored suit* :D
Wait, Becca! that's such an old trick! it wouldn't work. This will though. *drops my lace hanky in front of him and then steps in front of him and nearly trips* "Please forgive me sir but that's my hanky and it fell into some mud..would you mind getting it for me?".
Hehe :PAll right... *As Mr Collin's reluctantly leans down to get the handkerchief, we both stamp in the mud, splashing him* (will that work? :D)
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*after splashing him and carefully avoiding the mud ourselves, I innocently sympathise with Mr Collins.*
"Oh what a horrible thing to happen my dear Mr Collins! And when you are wearing such a nice suit!"
"This was Lady Catherine De Bourgh's favourite, I don't know if I will ever get it clean!"
*whislt I occupy him, I look to Becca and Anna in the hope that they will do something else to Collins - he deserves it!*
Thanks so much... Becca, please behave while I think!
Haha, go ahead - your turn Anna :)*curtseys and steps back to allow Anna to do something awfully nasty to Mr Collins* :D
:D Soph
Mr. Collins, you may not know who I am and why I am here but that isn't the point of this discussion. You married Charlotte Lucas which I do realize was mostly out of pity but for goodness' sake you really had to be a total jerk and idiot and you act like Lady Catherine is the best person who has graced the world with her presence. I do realize that you were smitten with Lizzie Bennet but why did you pick Charlotte Lucas as your wife? Tell me that! And take this from me. *slaps him across the face*
Hehe, you really like slapping people, Anna.*Wipes muddy water off my shoes with another handkerchief. I then throw the handkerchief at Mr Collins, who catches out of reflex, and I laugh as he gets mud all over his hands*.
Yes, I do, Becca. I am normally a very peaceful and nonviolent type of person but slapping people is my favorite..so thanks a lot. "Mr. Collins, if you have any dignity at all, divorce Charlotte and let her have a life free of you and Lady Catherine...she would be much happier." (added to the above sentences).
Becca wrote: "Hehe, you really like slapping people, Anna.
*Wipes muddy water off my shoes with another handkerchief. I then throw the handkerchief at Mr Collins, who catches out of reflex, and I laugh as he ge..."
Haha, good one. Is there anything else we want to say/do to the unfortunate Mr Collins before moving on to someone else? If not, we should probably wait for Soph, I think it may be her turn to choose next. :)
Yes, we must do something to Mr. Collins before he leaves.
:D*steps on Mr Collin's ankles as he walks away toward a shop angrily, so he falls face first into the shop window*
Not that violent or cruel, Becca. I wasn't thinking that type of way at all. Wait for me, all right? He'll most likely get cuts all over his face and when he comes home, Charlotte will be worried sick and anxious.
Haha, I said into, not through. Of course I wouldn't make him break through it, that would be sick.
