Paradoxical Questions!

[John]

If you have a question that's so dumb no one knows the answer post it HERE!

[John]

If Neil Armstrong was the first man on the moon, who took the picture?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Cameras?

[John]

Okay then...
If cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Mimes can talk. Unless they are mute.

[John]

If cops arrest a mute mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Do they know that he is mute?

[John]

Yes.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

He can
A. Use sign language or
B. Get a lawyer to talk for him, so yes.

[John]

GAH!
If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

At the same time? And why gah?

[John]

You keep answering questions that I have never found an answer for in all my 13 years!
Yes, at the same time.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Oh. Can you tell me want you want to fail at?

[John]

Uh...no.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

You want to fail, so something must have been happening where you were(subjunctive!) portrayed to you as 'good' and someone or something was portrayed to you 'bad', meaning that you had some reason to fail, so the other person or thing loses and you win.

[John]

**mouth drops open**

[John]

**sigh**
If you drink Pepsi at work at the Coke factory, will they fire you?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Well, no, they would be violating the first amendment.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Unless you sign a contract that says you can't.

[John]

OH MY GLOB!!!

[Laszlo, The Professor]

You watch Adventure Time?

[John]

Why is lemonade made with artificial flavor and dishwashing soap made with real lemons?

[John]

Laszlo wrote: "You watch Adventure Time?"

Sometimes.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Because it makes companies more money.

[John]

How many weeks are there in a lightyear?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Who is your favorite character?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

As many as in a year, because a light year is how far it is for light to travel a year.

[John]

Laszlo wrote: "Who is your favorite character?"

Magic Man.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Cool.

[John]

What does cheese say when somebody takes its picture?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Unless 'Cheese' is the name of a talking creature or the cheese is mutated, nothing.

[John]

Humor me.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

If a person who always tells the truth says he or she is telling a lie, is he or she telling the truth or telling a lie?

[John]

Telling the truth.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

If he or she is telling the truth, he or she is telling a lie, meaning he or she is telling the truth, and on and on and on. It has no answer.

[John]

Holy paradoxical conclusions...

[Laszlo, The Professor]

My favorite character would have to be B-MO. I used to like Princess Bubblegum, but then I found out she was a jerk.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

I made an argument! Yay! Or nay! http://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/1...

[John]

You come to a fork in the road. One path leads to riches and happiness, the other, to death and destruction. Standing at the fork in the road there are two brothers, one always lies, and one who always tells the truth. You don't know which brother tells the truth, and which lies. If you could ask only one question, and you have to be sure you are on the right path before you start down the path. What question do you ask the brothers?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

"You go, first, if you can. Can you?"

[John]

What the...

[John]

Ask either brother "Which road would your brother tell me is the right way?" then take the opposite road.

[Laszlo, The Professor]

You still wouldn't know, because the devious one would go the opposite direction of the nice one, and you don't know which is which.

[John]

When you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Purple, unless you don't see it turn blue or you don't choke it hard enough. It also depends on what color its blood is.

[John]

Hey!

[Laszlo, The Professor]

You know each other? I wasn't disagreeing.

[Badgerlord, Marquis de Badger]

There is a man named Harry who wants to get a tattoo. However, there is only two tattooist in the very isolated town he lives in. He figures he'd check them both out before decideding which one to go to.

He goes to the first tattooist and asks if he could see some tattoos. The first tattooist, takes off his shirt and shows Harry a tattoo on his shoulder. Harry isn't very impressed, so he says he'll think about it and leaves.

He goes to the second tattoois and asks the same thing. The man shows him the eagle tattoo he has across his back. Harry is impressed at the quality. So why, if both tattooists have the same price and store cleanliness, does he decided to go the first tattooist?

[Laszlo, The Professor]

Because he doesn't know who did the tattooists tattoos, or because he doesn't want to get it on his back.

[Badgerlord, Marquis de Badger]

Indeed. If there's only two tatooists, they must do each others tattoos.