Alex's Plot Problems....

[Amy, Writer Blocked in Chief]

he should like snickers bars. Maybe you should make the reporter an undercover police man checking to make sure it's humane and stuff... they do that sometimes...

what part are you stuck on?

[Trish]

Maybe Makayla realizes that she's slowly losing her grip on her own sanity and discovers that Dr. P is actually oppressing his patients to keep them in the asylum instead of healing them.

[Trish]

Maybe try to develop a general timeline of events that you want to happen. Then you can try filling in more and more details between each event and then eventually be able to describe it.

[Elaine]

Work on characterization. With round characters there can be much more detail/day-to-day action/subplots without being boring. You enjoy spending time with the characters and learning more about them. Try to see if you can get the character talking for themselves.

[Amy, Writer Blocked in Chief]

Makayla should have a passion for Mexican food. It doesn't have to be a main thing- just a little something thrown in.

So, let me get this right.

CURRENT TIMELINE:

-Makayla gets herself checked into an assylum to make sure it is under humane conditions. Is she a police man or a journalist (I think the first one would make more sense. She could have a journilist friend, though.)

-Dr. P is doing what?

-Somehow, Makayla escapes

-they get chased.

You should think up things; for example, maybe Dr. P is saying things like 'I never told you to do that' when really he did, so that they only think they're crazy.

When they escape, Makayla falls down the stairs. Little things like that.

[Amy, Writer Blocked in Chief]

okay... you should tell about the escape, so we can help :)

There should be a mix up; officially, M should have the police on her side, since she is one, but since 'officially' she got checked into an assylum, and is escaping, and since investigations of conditions are secret, or else they didn't work, the police not in on the plan think that Makayla is just a challenged person escaping.

then the Chief of Police should bust Makayla and friends out of jail.

wHo the heck is Jessica?

[Leiko]

Oh, Alex! You should make the main character part of a copy of this one experiment, where 9 people or something tried to be checked into one by saying there were voices in there heads, then once (and if) admitted, they act normal and claim not to see if the staff would notice. It was very cool.

[Amy, Writer Blocked in Chief]

I don't get it.

[Elaine]

Yeah, sorry Lye, but that didn't really make sense. :\

[Amy, Writer Blocked in Chief]

any other stuck parts? see the character helper that I posted in the characters section. Really, really helpful.