Weekly Short Stories Contest and Company! discussion

Ryan's #5737 reminds me of the song American Pie by Don Mclean, it's similar to this line Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry...

Yours was an excellent follow-up :)

M wrote: "Noon’s chased silver bends
where beyond barges’ long lines
a vast tank farm stands;

in honeysuckle’s
vined deeps, the carved acanthus,
the broken brick, sleeps."

A lovely flower
Pretty, but fragile silence
Still can break the best

(Very nice, Lilian!)


Ruins Near a Tank Farm

Where silver-knobbed doors
opened on ornate ceilings
and vast polished floors,

a tangle of blooms
clings to columns’ plinths and walls
returning to mud

where the river bends
in silences nothing stirs
but her thud of heels

down the floorless halls,
the roofless, leaf-strewn rooms,
the broad front steps slick

with mold as she waits,
the long noon of moveless leaves
in which he’d limped back,

his wound festering,
his mind the sulphurous haze
ordnance spews with lead.

One high chimney skews,
its broken brick hung with vines,
and where a staircase

had been, her fingers
find him, on her lips the dews
of many summers.

Nice start to my morning, everyone. I also sang Ryan's! Great imagery M and Lilian. Amusingly philosophical. Adrian and Zack.

Fossilized wafer.
A copula of noir.
Matter of savior.

Interesting images, Cat!

The saviour's flavour
found fond favour forever
but sans savoir-faire.

((Ooh! Good one, Guy! :D ))

Flavors tingling in
My mind like old, sweet champagne
Fake bubbles so bright

((Thank you; I see you have, like my self, an odd taste for what constitutes 'haiku'! And yours is an excellent continuation. :-)))

Thanks, M~

And Cat, excellent entry into our curious little thread. I loved your play on words, and it truly inspired my efforts. Welcome to Haiku.

Inspiration is my cynosure. Per aspera ad astra.

“Per aspirin ad
asterisk!” Caesar liked to
quote, when seeing stars,

the bottle empty.
He knew his Gallic wars were
merely a footnote.

The pill bottle in
My hand with vomit colored
Fingers wrapped around

My stomach convulsed,
in knots. Inwardly I screamed,
with a burning thirst:

“Please don’t bury me
in polka dots, or without
hosing me down first!”

(( *eyebrow raise in M's direction* How'd you think of that, if I want to know?))

The image that came to mind was of a vomit-covered hand holding a pill bottle. Since it followed a verse in which Caesar had emptied a bottle of wine, I assumed the vomit on the hand was consequence of emptying the bottle of pills. I admit, a grasp of cause and effect isn’t one of my strengths.

Lissome fingers do clutch
The handle of a lister (lister-drill)
Our words are the seeds.

Beautiful, Cat!


Her eyes commanded
seed be planted when the sun
through orchards slanted.

Her lissome fingers
grasped a plow, the mule a muse
with a rakish brow.

Very nice Cat and M :)

parched land sings to life
as the plow does its magic
the mule becomes horse

Good morning!

Good morning, Leslie!

Good evening, M :) and good night?

Yes. It’s late for me. Goodnight, pirates!

Night, M.


Lemon Queens hold court
as Amaterasu sleeps
and the right eye gains

The moonbeams contort
Udumbara blossoms peep
-brings a new Kings reign

the Summer King's reign,
a dusty burnt orange haze
of wildfire and ash,
surrenders to crystal tears
- triumph of the Autumn Queen

Very nice, Zack! Great imagery, Ryan :)

Thank you, Leslie :o)

Zack and Ryan, these are excellent and seem to be breaking new ground, with the exotic names in #5768 and the beautiful words of an image (“a dusty burnt orange haze / of wildfire and ash”) in #5769.

Thanks, M!

Catch the dead leaves for
dinner, ahead the weeping
mist - fire's last supper

Lol, I think this is silly. I'm not fit to write anything now.

This is very nice! It will be fun to follow.

Really good, Leslie!

Merci beaucoup, Messieurs :)

now my brain is totally fried :D Je vais dormir.

“Have you had your wan-
wood leafmeal today?” was all
I could think to say.

Forest green and leaf
Of different colors; brown
Orange, gold and pale

Fall colors surround
the almost abandoned street;
a wintry wind blows.

"Wind, wind, gently sway"
The little goose girl would say
As she released gold

I like that repetition: “them / near, her nearer . . .” It has an intensifying effect.

I agree with you, Ellis - 5763 is a knock out!
Your 5782 is very nice, too. I like the images you bring with wheat and geese.
Lilian! 5781 is just beautiful. I love it. I also like your autumn hues in 5779.
Adrian, your 5780 is so vivid it sent a cold shiver up my spine. Haunting!
M, thank you for the introduction to Hopkins. Very nicely done, as usual.

Well done, all. This thread is so full of life.

Thank you Ellis and Ryan! This long ago became my favorite thread. To me, there’s something addicting about trying to crystallize an image in a 5-7-5. Ryan, I think the last stanza of Hopkins’ “Inversnaid” is one of the most beautiful things ever written in English.

Congratulations, M! You've made the finals in the Poetry group once again. 'Rendezvous' is an outstanding poem. I liked all the finalists over there this month, but your poem is the stand out for me.

Well done to you too, Jim, for your honorable mention.

Ryan wrote: "I agree with you, Ellis - 5763 is a knock out!
Your 5782 is very nice, too. I like the images you bring with wheat and geese.
Lilian! 5781 is just beautiful. I love it. I also like your autumn hues..."
Oh, thank you Ryan! YOU Always appreciate the good in people and we love you for it! Thank you!

You're welcome, Lilian. You should be very proud of your 5-7-5 verses. You have gone from strength to strength in a very short space of time and these latest posts are just spectacular. Keep it up, I'm enjoying them immensely :)

the farmer's girl, Fran,
led a boy into her barn,
out gamboled a man

(Ryan, thank you! I was astonished it got picked for judging.)


Doe-eyed she led his
innocence to the slaughter,
the farmer’s daughter.

Skip ahead nine months,
surprise! Farmer comes knocking
with un-doe-like eyes.

Plowing fields of fun
Add up to eighteen years of
Child support payments

Haha! Love it, Zack!

jar with eighteen flies,
rubber band, threadbare cloth lid.
lesson or memory?

Bugs and flies, spiders
Do not dare to touch the man
With a black widow