Weekly Short Stories Contest and Company! discussion
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Haiku
message 5051:
by
Ryan
(new)
Dec 28, 2013 02:45AM
It's all over for you now, Angie. You'll find yourself breaking down thoughts and conversation into 5-7-5 format without even realising you're doing it. Hooked like the rest of us ;)
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H. L., an officeflunky, soon spiralled downward,
a haiku junkie.
Ryan wrote: "It's all over for you now, Angie. You'll find yourself breaking down thoughts and conversation into 5-7-5 format without even realising you're doing it. Hooked like the rest of us ;)"Lol! Yes, Angie, it would seem you have been contaminated by the word play magic of the WSS haiku thread. Welcome and very well met.
XD this morning i was talking to my parents and I found myself counting syllables.
The well-versed quack, DocMee Hal Pu: "There's no known cure
for this haikuflu!"
Sneezing and sniffling.Another miserable day.
Wish I'd got that shot!
Each word gives a shot,the chance to redeem this thread
above verbal snot.
[[sorry about that.]]
Running noses andChatty mouths. Examples of
Our indiscretion.
((Sorry. That doesn't make any sense ))
Snot ran well, but lostby a nose - beaten by Throat
(who's a little hoarse).
Thank you Jim and Angie (I think - LOL!)Angie, it makes perfect sense!
Nice Ryan!
The indiscrete Ku
left five and seven poets
mouthing bars of soap.
Excellent, Angie and Guy - very funny writing. And thanks, Guy :)
Thank you Ryan. Angie, you seem to be an angel of humour!
To bee, to break outin hives, or to hemorrhage
in 5-7-5’s.
Thanks Ryan :)Bees buzzing around
And my sister is screaming
Cuz she hates insects
a spiderweb oflightning; weaving storms onto
tempestuous skies.
(Beautiful, Kat! What an image: “a spiderweb of / lightning . . .”)
A heartbroken storm,soul-broken teardrops falling
on yesterday's dreams.
Sheesh, the thread just took a serious turn :D What stunning writing, Kat and Mandy. These will be fun to follow.
Lightning's jagged warp,softened by the weft of clouds;
a squall looms at sea.
Threatening darkenss,just beyond a horizon
of deceitful truths.
A sky she stippledwith flickering yesterdays
of furtive glances.
Her forbidden loveforever in her life, but
always out of reach.
His eyes reflectedher yearning heart. Forever
near, always apart.
They'd spent years apart.She was searching for a man
Who was never gone.
Blinded by the love
that could never be, her eyes
wished that she could see
that could never be, her eyes
wished that she could see
She wished she could seeAfter staring at the sun
Too long, now blinded.
tangled visions veiled
her eyes; she stumbled on a
road filled with his lies.
her eyes; she stumbled on a
road filled with his lies.
You fed me your lies.My naivete hoped they were true
But they never were
Salty, tossed waves beatat your craggy eyes as you
watch the seagulls fly.
Mandy wrote: "Threatening darkenss,just beyond a horizon
of deceitful truths."
deceitful truths really strikes me as a particularly excellent phrase/image!
Oh! And the haiku is excellent, too.
world encompassing eyes of grey slate watch sea birds
wheel before diving
and the whole world isout of sight, out of mind, but
I can't forget you.
I think you missed an 'of' between out and sight.
Yes, so good. Kat! You are on-line late!And this did take a serious turn! Nice.
what is it that hides
behind the unsought doorway
I mistook for you?
Thank you Ryan! I would love to stick around and chat, but it is 2am here! Time for bed. I have the final coat of paint to paint on a bathroom tomorrow.Al shared a fantastic song with me. Give this a try: http://youtu.be/fE5PIxLtgw4
I stepped through your door,looking for my salvation,
loosing more of me.
Her eyes’ tranquil graystold of seasides, of summers,
of shadowed doorways.
Footsteps in the sand,trailing broken promises,
that lead back to you.
The footprints she’d leftin the hot sand led to a
margarita stand.
Guy’s #6484 is intriguing! There’s not only the interest of the “unsought doorway” and what lurks behind it, but that it’s a projection, something from the deep dark of the speaker’s unconscious, using the mysterious person referred to as “you” as a hook to drape itself on.
Weekly Short Stories Contest and Company!
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Authors mentioned in this topic
David Payne (other topics)Thomas Merton (other topics)
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David K. Reynolds (other topics)
