Candy > Candy's Quotes

“Situation: The cradle I lent to a friend was just returned to me. I put it in the bedroom. Brian, age two, examines it and is fascinated by the swinging basket.   BRIAN: Mommy, I go up in cradle. MOMMY: Sweetheart, you’re much too big for that cradle. BRIAN: Yes, I go up in cradle. (begins to climb into it) MOMMY: (restraining him) Brian, Mommy said you’re too big. The cradle might break if I put you in it. BRIAN: Please, Mommy! I go up in cradle—NOW! (begins to whine) MOMMY: I said, NO!! (Poor move on Mommy’s part. I realized it as soon as I said it, and as Brian’s whining turned into a minor tantrum. I decided to try problem-solving with him.) MOMMY: Sweetie, I can see how much you want to get into the cradle—right now. It probably looks like lots of fun to swing in. I’d like to swing in it, too. The problem is that it won’t hold me, and it won’t hold you. We’re too big. BRIAN: Mommy too big—just like Briney. (Brian leaves the room and comes back with Goover, his stuffed bear, and puts him in the cradle. He begins to rock the basket back and forth.) BRIAN: See, Mommy? Briney rocking Goover, okay? MOMMY:   (Whew!) Goover is just the right size.”
― Adele Faber, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk

“It’s a bittersweet road we parents travel. We start with total commitment to a small, helpless human being. Over the years we worry, plan, comfort, and try to understand. We give our love, our labor, our knowledge, and our experience—so that one day he or she will have the inner strength and confidence to leave”
― Adele Faber, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk

“Let us be different in our homes. Let us realize that, along with food, shelter, and clothing, we have another obligation to our children, and that is to affirm their “rightness.” The whole world will tell them what’s wrong with them—loud and often. Our job is to let our children know what’s right about them.”
― Adele Faber, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk