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  • #1
    Clementine von Radics
    “I pity the woman who will love you
    when I am done. She will show up
    to your first date with a dustpan
    and broom, ready to pick up all the pieces
    I left you in. She will hear my name so often
    it will begin to dig holes in her. That
    is where doubt will grow. She will look
    at your neck, your thin hips, your mouth,
    wondering at the way I touched you.
    She will make you all the promises I did
    and some I never could. She will hear only
    the terrible stories. How I drank. How I lied.
    She will wonder (as I have) how someone
    as wonderful as you could love a monster
    like the woman who came before her. Still,
    she will compete with my ghost.
    She will understand why you do not look
    in the back of closets. Why you are afraid
    of what’s under the bed. She will know
    every corner of you is haunted
    by me.”
    Clementine von Radics

  • #2
    Clementine von Radics
    “I. Those of us born by water are never afraid enough of drowning. Bruises used to trophy my knees from my death-defying tree climb jumps. Growing up, my backyard was a forest of blackberry bushes. I learned early nothing sweet will come to you unthorned.

    II. At twelve your body becomes a currency. So Jenny and I sat down and cut up all our clothes into nothing. That year I failed math class but knew the exact number of calories in a carrot stick. I learned early being desired goes hand in hand with hunger.

    III. The last time I tried to scream I felt my father climbing up through my throat and into my mouth.

    IV. There is a certain kind of girl who reads Lolita at fourteen and finds religion. I painted my eyes black and sucked barroom cherries to red my tongue. There was a boy who promised Judas really did love Jesus. I learned early every kiss and betrayal are up for interpretation.

    V. I think he must have conferenced with my nightmares on exactly how to hurt me.

    VI. He never broke my heart. He only turned it into a compass that always points me back to him.”
    Clementine von Radics



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