Izabela Marx > Izabela's Quotes

“Excluding the language barrier, the worst thing in Brazil is being a woman in a very male dominated, looks obsessed culture. I thought the United States was bad when it came to presenting girls with unrealistic body expectations. Brazil is so much worse. Now that I’m raising a daughter, I realize just how bad it is. All girls are called princessa and told not to cry because it’s ugly (Não chora! Vai ficar feia!). I could not find baby girls clothes in any other colour than pink. Toddlers go with their moms to the salons and get mani-pedis. On billboards, in magazines, everywhere you see advertisements for plastic surgery that you can pay for in 20 instalments! Brazil has more plastic surgeries per capita than any country in the world. It will be an uphill battle to raise a girl who does not think makeup is necessary for the gym.”
― Cyril Richert, My life abroad: A selection of expat stories

“Colonialism is not simply content to impose its rule upon the present and the future of a dominated country. Colonialism is not satisfied merely with holding a people in its grip and emptying the native’s brain of all form and content. By a kind of perverted logic, it turns to the past of the oppressed people, and distorts, disfigures and destroys it.”[9] Put succinctly, colonialists attempt to colonise not just territories, resources and destinies, but the mind, culture and history of a people as a necessary means to achieve total and perpetual exploitation.”
― Choolwe Mwetwa, Why Africa is Poor: And why removing poverty will be painfully slow

“Worries don't drown in alcohol. They can swim." -Heinz Rühmann”
― Oliver Gaspirtz, German Wisdom: Funny, Inspirational and Thought-Provoking Quotes by Famous Germans

“There is a world of difference between a child who stops calling her mother because she no longer needs her, and a child who stops calling because she knows that however much she calls, her mother will never come.”
― Carlos González, Kiss Me: How to Raise your Children with Love

“Traditional immigration countries such as Australia, Canada, and the United States have always emphasized the importance of economic self-sufficiency. Therefore, providing refugees and immigrants with equitable access to the labor market even before they learned English had always been a number one goal of integration efforts. Ideally, newcomers would also receive a thorough orientation to the social mores, laws, and legal systems of their new country but understanding these traditions is not a substitute for decent employment, vocational training, and opportunities for upward mobility.”
― Elzbieta M. Gozdziak, Europe and the Refugee Response: A Crisis of Values?

“The populist tendencies to present refugees and immigrants as a threat to ‘European values’ and traditions of tolerance, freedom, and democracy are misplaced. There is a need to change misperceptions that members of the host society and newcomers have of each other. Bridging the gaps that separate different groups would strengthen communities, mitigate divisive social tensions, and, of course, position immigrants to participate more effectively in the wider society.”
― Elzbieta M. Gozdziak, Europe and the Refugee Response: A Crisis of Values?

“It is important to counter these misperceptions and inform the general public that most of the terrorists that launched attacks on European cities were born and raised in Europe. This begs the question: why were they radicalized? Perhaps they were easily lured by terrorist organizations because we failed to provide them with opportunities to thrive in society?”
― Elzbieta M. Gozdziak, Europe and the Refugee Response: A Crisis of Values?

“What is immoral is the act of deliberately causing frustration in a human being. If this evening the lights go out for ten minutes in your street, you’ll never know whether there has been an actual power failure or whether the electricity company has decided to cut off the power for random intervals of ten minutes to teach citizens to tolerate frustration and to make do without electricity.”
― Carlos González, Kiss Me: How to Raise your Children with Love

“We can invent a thousand excuses to hide this reality, but the fact is our society condemns violence, except when the victim is a child. If the victim is a child, and the aggressor another child, a teacher, or especially a parent, we will tolerate and sometimes applaud incredible amounts of violence.”
― Carlos González, Kiss Me: How to Raise your Children with Love

“it is the justification of violence against children that distinguishes it from other types of violence in our society, and is an unspeakable disgrace. A large section of public opinion, as well as countless experts and intellectuals, who in other respects are educated, kind and understanding, maintain that a “timely smack” is not only acceptable, but recommendable: a useful “educational” tool that helps the victim become a better person. The victim is told: “It’s for your own good”, or even, the height of shamelessness: “It hurts me more than it hurts you.” No one, or no one living in a democracy at the beginning of the twenty-first century at any rate, would dare justify violence in this way if the victim were an adult.”
― Carlos González, Kiss Me: How to Raise your Children with Love

“Não importa se carregam o bebê no sling, se usam fraldas de pano ou se ensinam seu filho de quatro semanas a usar o banheiro: ainda assim, as mulheres é que estão fazendo a maior parte dos cuidados à criança, não importa sob qual filosofia parental. Dar um nome bonito ao fato de que ainda estamos fazendo todo o maldito trabalho não o torna menos sexista ou injusto. Uma das principais razões pelas quais as mulheres — especialmente as que foram mães recentemente — relatam serem infelizes no casamento é a divisão desigual do trabalho em casa, incluindo os cuidados aos filhos.”
― Jessica Valenti, Por que ter filhos?: Uma mãe explora a verdade sobre a criação de filhos e a felicidade

“The more you can keep your gaze on the relationship between the two of you and avoid looking at others for validation, the better a parent you will be, and the more secure your child will eventually become. The same advice goes for accepting and supporting the individuality of your relationship with your partner, as well as the specificity of his relationship with the baby.”
― Alexandra Sacks, What No One Tells You: A Guide to Your Emotions from Pregnancy to Motherhood

“Competition is a common social tension that we hear about from new mothers. As with any other time in life, some people, consciously or not, may find a way to turn the conversation to prove that they have it the best, or even the worst. Maybe you’re commiserating about how tired you are, and your friend one-ups you with stories about how her sleep deprivation is being compounded by her demanding (and impressive) accomplishments at work or full social calendar. Competitive friends are usually not trying to put you down but, rather, trying to make themselves feel better. When it comes to parenting, there are very few “right” answers, and that makes everyone feel insecure about their decisions.”
― Alexandra Sacks, What No One Tells You: A Guide to Your Emotions from Pregnancy to Motherhood

“One thing that is commonly seen is that children in families where one parent works part time and the other works full time tend to perform best in school—better than children whose parents both work full time or who have one parent who doesn’t work at all.3 This could be due to the working configuration, but I think it’s more likely due to differences between these families.4”
― Emily Oster, Cribsheet: A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool

“Second, studies tend to find that the impacts of both parents working are positive (i.e., working is better) for kids from poorer families, and less positive (or even slightly negative) for children from richer families.”
― Emily Oster, Cribsheet: A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool

“parenting matters. Much more consistent than any of the associations in these studies is the association between parenting and child outcomes. Having books in your house and reading them to your kid is going to matter much more than what books they have at day care. This seems to be true even though your child probably spends as many waking hours with their care providers as with you. I don’t think we know precisely why this is the case, although it may be that you as the parent are the most consistent influence your child has. Second, childcare quality matters much more than which type of childcare you have. A high-quality day care is likely to be better than a low-quality nanny, and vice versa.”
― Emily Oster, Cribsheet: A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool

“(Juice is not recommended for babies under 1 year, and many pediatricians and dietitians do not recommend juice at all, regardless of age.)”
― Malina Linkas Malkani, Simple & Safe Baby-Led Weaning: How to Integrate Foods, Master Portion Sizes, and Identify Allergies

“face the challenges of learning a new language and finding a job in a country that may not recognize your qualifications. We’ve even heard of doctors cleaning toilets. Then there’s the matter of adapting to the weather, since most refugees resettle in colder climates. Finally, resettlement adds to the brain-drain, siphoning men and women who could contribute to society in their homelands. Yes, repatriation is better, but lack of opportunity often stands in the way of repatriation because there is nothing to go home to. Before fleeing their countries, many refugees cultivated the earth. When they fled, that land was almost always taken from them or at least occupied by others. Returning home to fight the occupiers can create conflict and cost lives. Many refugees either can’t go home or turn down offers of voluntary repatriation because they have nothing to return to.”
― Innocent Magambi, Refugee For Life: My Journey across Africa to Find a Place Called Home

“Be careful that, by coming to Africa as a volunteer, you are not primarily meeting your own need to feel accomplished and virtuous. Imagine a person stuck in a pit and you have two choices. You can either join her neighbors who are pulling the person out with a rope—or you can get into the pit with her, hand her a loaf of bread, take pictures for your Facebook page, and then leave. Consider a major mental shift away from pity and toward supporting the committed, long-term experts on the ground.”
― Innocent Magambi, Refugee For Life: My Journey across Africa to Find a Place Called Home

“Many volunteers and short-term relief efforts want to do what they assume is needed rather than what would result in the most sustainable good.”
― Innocent Magambi, Refugee For Life: My Journey across Africa to Find a Place Called Home

“Kids younger than school age get an average of six to eight colds a year, most of them between September and April.7 This works out to about one a month. These colds last on average fourteen days.8 A month is thirty days. So in the winter, on average, your kid will have a cold 50 percent of the time. On top of this, most kids end their cold with a cough that can last additional weeks. It adds up.”
― Emily Oster, Cribsheet: A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool

“When you are angry or frustrated, you might discipline them differently or too harshly. This can confuse and scare kids because they don’t know what to expect. They might not understand why they’re punished more severely for some things than others. This can hurt their development, making it harder for them to learn from their mistakes and take responsibility.”
― SpreadLife Publishing, Anger Management for Parents with Kids 3-7: Easy DBT Workbook to Develop Coping Skills, Achieve Instant Emotional Regulation, and Master Peaceful Parenting to Raise Resilient Children

“Ficar sozinha na corda bamba do desconhecimento da juventude é vivenciar a beleza excruciante da liberdade total e a ameaça de eterna indecisão.”
― Maya Angelou, Eu sei por que o pássaro canta na gaiola