Devina Robinson > Devina's Quotes

“Every behavior is a form of communication - it’s up to us to decipher the message.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Many parents, therapists, and teachers have said some variations of “But he already knows how to behave!” or “If he can behave at school, he can behave at home!”. We must realize that this is false. Your child’s ability to act appropriately hinges on their current state, skills, and available resources at that specific moment. If they could, they would.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Now that we know children are doing their best, how do we change our ingrained responses to be consistent with that knowledge? It is really hard. But that’s OK, you can do hard things.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“We must remain open-minded and challenge any preconceived notions we may have about our child. We often cannot see the forest (the causes and solutions to our children’s negative behaviors) because of the trees (our negative assumptions).”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“By assuming positive intent, we can approach situations with an open mind and are more likely to be able to solve problems creatively. When we assume positive intentions, we become better able to see the actual roots of the problem. And understanding the cause of a problem makes it significantly easier to solve!”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Amidst the chaos of childhood, caregivers provide necessary order.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“You cannot separate the body and the mind- nor can you separate the body and behavior.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Children are expected to behave like children.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Tiny humans are learning how to be human. Being unskilled is expected!”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“In so many of our children, poor behavioral regulation is a developmental delay, much like a child struggling to catch up in reading or learning to walk. Just as we wouldn’t chastise a child for not reading or walking before they’re developmentally ready, we shouldn’t punish them for struggling with emotional and behavioral regulation.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“The conventional approach often measures children’s behavior against their chronological age. Instead of adhering to chronological milestones, it is vital to go by a child’s overall developmental age. If an eight-year-old child has a two-year-old’s problem-solving, language, and social skills, they will behave like a two-year-old when they have a problem. Being aware of this allows us to set more realistic and compassionate expectations for each child and tailor our approaches to helping the child. Just like with any other developmental delay, it is crucial to provide adaptations and accommodations instead of only focusing on remediation.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“When children feel safe, they thrive. When they feel unsafe, they fight to survive.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“The brain’s job is to keep you alive. Not make you happy or well behaved. And it is obsessed with doing its job well.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“The world bombards us with a constant flow of sensory information, and some brains can handle this bombardment better than others.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“It all begins with a plan.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“I want it my way, and you want it yours.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“We all want our own way. It is natural for individuals to have their own desires, preferences, and goals. However, not everyone possesses the same skill level to achieve what they want.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Love your child for who they are and watch them shine.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Learning to manage emotions requires instruction, similar to learning math or tying shoes.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Now that we know better, we must do better and help others do better.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Children do what they see, not what we say. Children observing us responding poorly to a situation can impact their behavior and problem-solving skills. By verbalizing the steps involved in rectifying a mistake or finding a better solution, we show our children the process and involve them in the learning experience. This can be done by saying things like, “I didn’t handle that well; let me try again,” or “I can see I made a mistake. Let’s figure out a better way together.”
― Devina King, From Surviving To Thriving: The Art and Science of Guiding Children To Develop Behavioral Regulation

“Our brains create our behaviors, and our behaviors create our brains.”
― Devina King