A Different Kind of Gone

by Catherine Ryan Hyde

Control her by controlling custody of their daughter.”

“Because they want their anger. They don’t want to let it go. It makes them feel powerful. It makes them feel safe.”

If there’s ever a time in the future when you feel like it’s moving farther away . . . just let it move. Don’t get too attached to it. Don’t make it a nice little bed in the corner and put down a bowl of water. The less we feed something, the more likely it is to move along.”

He was into battery. You know. Inflicting as much pain and damage as he could until he felt better.

in this life you can choose whatever you want. But take a look at the price tag first, because you’re going to have to pay for it.’

Never pick up some guilt that’s not yours. Bad enough we’ve got to deal with our own our whole lives.”

For me it was how I put away all these parts of myself that didn’t fit with him. Stupid stuff, like what kind of music I liked, or what I thought about a political situation. I guess I told you something about this a while back. I didn’t lie about what I liked or what I thought. I just let it sink down to some spot where it wouldn’t get in the way. Not because I thought his way should win, even though now—looking back—it seems like it always did. But more because . . . it was like the difference between my day going smoothly or everything turning into a total mess.”

think we all do that in all relationships. But when we’re with someone who’s easily upset, we tend to do it to an abnormal degree.”