Changing for Good

by James O. Prochaska

Life without problem behavior is undeniably different, especially when you have given up a substance or a way of life that was once your best friend. Quite often, the euphoria of an initial change gives way to a sense of loss and deprivation, which in turn may wear down your resolve. When we work with people who have given up drugs or alcohol, we encourage them to go through a mourning process. To maintain abstinence, it’s important that they say good-bye to their old friend and trusted companion. Yes, alcohol causes broken marriages, DWI arrests, lost jobs, but for many alcohol is a constant companion and sturdy crutch over the years. Regardless of your problem behavior, regardless of your level of disgust when you enter the action stage, don’t be surprised if you wake up one day missing your old habits. Don’t think, however, that this means you cannot live without your old behavior; you are in the process of making a new self that does not need your old problems.