And this same pattern applies to spending too much time online, binge shopping, working too much, gambling too often, obsessing over exercise or another hobby at the expense of family time—any habit that provides short-term escape and comfort but causes long-term problems. “The problem isn’t the substance or behavior of choice,” Szalavitz told me. “The problem is why you need that drug, why those drugs appeal to you, and why you are trying to get out? What are you trying to escape? What do you need in your life to feel comfortable and safe and productive?”
