Lessons From a Third Grade Dropout

by Rick Rigsby

Have we reached the point in our society where it is more important to look good rather than be good? Has the pride in doing good work been replaced by self-entitlement, perfect offices, and slick suits?

To exist offers the illusion of freedom without any responsibility. Our present culture encourages effortless living since all that matters is appearing successful.

Friends, possessions, and surroundings have value inasmuch as they are significant metaphors used in the construction of an image that promises temporal rewards and immediate gratification.

essence, I had to move from making an impression to making an impact.

The lack of wisdom in our present society poses a critical threat to the quality of our lives. A substantial disconnect exists in our world today which results in a massive division between generations.

Simply stated, the great disconnect is between an older generation of doers verses a contemporary generation of viewers.

The environment produces workers who emphasize appearance over substance, personality over principle, and convenience over character. What good is technological supremacy without authentic leadership? What good is an information superhighway without trustworthy travelers?

“Rick, always place character above gifting.” It was a one-hour lunch that will stay with me for a lifetime.

have integrity; there is a consistency between what they say and what they do.

“Kind deeds are never lost” (see Rom. 2:6–7).

As I listened, I recall thinking, “That’s my Dad!” His philosophy was you don’t give based on what you have or what you don’t have. You give when there is a need. We had little to nothing. But in an act of unselfish kindness, my father gave everything he had to help someone else.

“Humility is the God-given self-assurance that eliminates the need to prove the worth of who you are and the rightness of what you do.”

Choosing to speak in a kind tone has the power to turn away wrath, change a mood, even transform a relationship.

“Guard well within you that treasure, kindness. Know how to give without hesitation, how to lose without regret, how to acquire without meanness.”

As leaders, make every effort to commit acts of kindness routinely. As team members, worry less about impressing others with imitations of success (words, wardrobe, and whereabouts), and focus more on impacting those around you with kindness! A simple act of kindness can turn around a career, transform a relationship, and even impact someone for a lifetime. I’ll never forget one simple act committed by my father a few years back.

Son, always be as kind as you can to others—often such a sacrifice will mean giving your best away.

employee groups working for pay rather than pride, performance, and pleasure. These companies do not need more technology. Organizations are in critical need of an infusion of kindness to strengthen the immune system and boost energy levels! Just a little kindness executed each day will boost the morale of an environment in ways a new computer never could!

“One sure way to make a negative lasting impression is to waste someone’s time!”

I wish I had a dime for every time my father said, “Son, you would rather be an hour early than a minute late.” Believe me, this was not just a phrase. Dad meant it, and he practiced it. My father was a cook at California Maritime Academy (CMA) in Vallejo, California, located just 30 miles north of San Francisco and about 15 minutes from our home. Today, CMA continues to educate and train midshipmen for careers in the maritime industry. From the 1950s through his retirement decades later, my Dad worked the breakfast and lunch shift beginning at five o’clock in the morning until one o’clock in the afternoon.

Discipline powers your life with the additive of endurance—a quality of life that will cause you to earn more money, get more jobs, sell more accounts, and realize more dreams simply because you didn’t quit. Winston Churchill said it best when addressing a graduating college class in the United States. I first saw his entire six-word speech as a young reporter assigned to cover the San Francisco Giants baseball team in the late 1970s. On the wall of the tunnel that connected the Giants’ locker room to the dugout at Candlestick Park were the simple words: “Never, Never, Never, Never Give Up.”

However, our generation has misplaced our allegiance to discipline and instead embraced convenience.

Discipline is the engine that powers your entire life. Moreover, discipline provides the necessary parameters for order, structure, purpose, and freedom—all of which are dimensions of character.

Discipline means subjecting yourself to rigorous and intense scrutiny, evaluation, and practice that inevitably will result in your life being enhanced. Simply choosing to live a disciplined lifestyle sets you apart from those who see no need to subject themselves to anything whether it’s for their good or not.

If our culture has any hope of moving from the superficial malaise of self-absorption, then we must be willing to embrace the simple life of a servant.

What kind of influence would your life reflect if today you began realizing that there was no higher calling than that of a servant? The power at your disposal would be supernatural. Your presence would be so powerful that you would not only influence people within your circles, but you would impact generations for eternity. All because you made a choice to develop a servant’s mentality.

If our work environments are going to change for the positive, then we need to see leaders with a servant’s heart. If our families have any chance at all, then family members must reconnect to a servant’s heart. If our culture has any hope of moving from the superficial malaise of self-absorption, then we must be willing to embrace the simple life of a servant.

Now, think for a moment about the people who have influenced you. Not the scores of friends you have, but the one or two who really impacted your life. At their core, they were helpers. Servants. People who gave, shared, encouraged, and helped in any way possible.

Aristotle said, “You are what you repeatedly do. Therefore, excellence ought be a habit, not an act.”

You want to succeed? Follow the advice of Mark Twain who said, “I’ve never allowed my schooling to get in the way of my education.” So graduates, today your formal education begins! Here’s your first lesson. Find a wise mentor. The mentor must have endured some setbacks, failures, and disappointments—for wisdom rarely is acquired without a storm. Remain with this person for as long as you can. Learn, grow, and prosper!

Such are the attributes that produce marketplace greatness and are worthy of a renaissance in our modern era. Specifically, these attributes can be reduced to two basics for excellence: listening and learning.

Hearing is an automatic process that occurs rather naturally. Thus, the process of hearing is passive at best. Hearing requires no skill sets, knowledge base, or special training. We hear messages while the television is on, while the shower is running, and while we are multi-tasking. Is there any wonder why we miss so much content? I like the quote, “Hearing tells you the music is playing. Listening tells you what the song is saying!”

When we hear, we fail to comprehend, categorize, or control most of the content. What we hear are the relational tones, which may or may not accurately represent the message. Listening, on the other hand, is the active process of gathering, storing, and utilizing messages. Active listening involves thinking, filtering, assimilating, paraphrasing, focusing, retaining, and responding. Active listening is both verbal and nonverbal. People who practice active listening skills are at a significant advantage in the workplace and in relationships. What chance is there of catching wisdom if you are always talking? There was a sign in my parents’ bedroom that read, “A fish would not get caught if he kept his mouth shut!” You might be amazed at how much you learn by just being quiet and listening more than being loud and talking. Note the tangible characteristics of wise people:

focus on doing your very best right now, and don’t stop! The primary goal is not to finish first. The primary goal is not to get the top grade. The primary goal is to do your best. Talk to any football coach; they will tell you effort is more important than results. Talk to any leader or supervisor; they will tell you effort consistently is more important than results.

Good enough is not good enough if it can be better. And better is not good enough if it can be best.

Simply stated, character wills the heart and charges the tongue to speak truth regardless of circumstances (moral strength). Character demands that one’s will be motivated by a finely tuned set of values based on a moral standard, and you adhere to that standard regardless of feelings, emotions, or past experiences (self-discipline). Character establishes irrevocable patterns for your life whereby you instinctively choose right—regardless of the cost!

However, what we learn from Gen. Yeager is that those daily choices have the power to instruct your instincts to remain in control—even when everything around you is out of control.

Character is transferable. I noted that if a young man displayed character off the field, he was likely to make the right choices on the field. Consider the words of current University of Tulsa head coach Steve Kragthorpe: “There is an undeniable correlation between on- and off-the-field behavior. If a player takes care of his business off the field, he is more than likely going to do the right things on the field.

Character reveals itself in private as well as in public. Former Texas A&M and NFL running back Rodney Thomas was the epitome of character. One of my favorite stories is of Thomas observing fellow players in the residence hall banging the vending machine in an effort to free the soft drink cans without paying. After the damage was done and the coast was clear, someone observed Thomas replenishing the vending machine with quarters. That—as Dwight L. Moody might say—is character in the dark!

Character demands respect. Among the greatest individuals I have encountered is the late Ray Dorr, former quarterbacks’ coach for A&M. The impact he had on the lives of players and coaches—in health as well as sickness—defies description. Ray Dorr was an inspiration to all who knew him. And because of his character—even in the midst of suffering from Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS, also known as Lou Gehrig’s disease)—his impact will be felt for generations to come.

Character keeps you on the right path. College basketball coaching legend Mike Krzyzewski tells the story of his mother insisting that he get on the right bus. The phrase reminded him that even if his tendency was to head the wrong way, be with people going the right way! The vast majority of our players—past and present—stayed the course. They remained on the right path. This is not the stuff that sells newspapers and boosts talk show ratings, but it is the st...

Living a lifestyle of character means you are choosing right regardless of the cost, regardless of the consequences, an...

“Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity.” My ego retarded my growth, stunted my development, and resulted in my living superficially for quite some time.

David J. Garrow’s Bearing the Cross: Martin Luther King, Jr. and the Southern Christian Leadership Conference. New York: Vintage Books, 1986.)

Remain true to yourself. • Think the best at all times. • Give your best regardless of the circumstances. • Keep standing no matter what.

Joyful • Thankful • Positive • Victorious • Honest • Sincere • Content

Jonathan Swift said that vision is the ability to see the invisible.