Time Regained (In Search of Lost Time #7)

by Marcel Proust

may be that the lover, made over-impatient by the extremity of his love, cannot wait with a sufficient pretence of indifference for the moment when he will obtain his desire. He constantly returns to the attack, writes incessantly to the woman he loves, tries all the time to see her, she refuses, he is in despair. At that point she understands: if she grants him her company and her friendship, these will seem such substantial blessings to him who thought he would never attain them, that she can refrain from giving him anything else, and take advantage of a moment when he can no longer bear not to see her, when he wants to end the war at any price, to impose upon him a peace whose prime condition will be the platonic nature of their relationship. Furthermore, for the whole of the time leading up to this treaty, the lover, always anxious, constantly waiting for a letter, or a look, has ceased to think about physical possession, the desire for which had tormented him to begin with, but which has become worn out with waiting and been replaced by needs of a different sort which, if not satisfied, are even more painful. Then the pleasure, which at the outset one had hoped to obtain from caresses, one receives later recast in the form of friendly words, promises of her presence, which, after the pangs of uncertainty, sometimes simply after a look from eyes clouded with coldness, making her seem so distant that one thinks one will never see her again, bring with them a delicious e...