Prime Directive (Star Trek: The Original Series)

by Judith Reeves-Stevens

“Computer: Could ye digest that gobbledygook for me?”

Love that line.

“Well, then, let me put it to you this way: If you don’t transmit my message to Hammersmith, then I shall rewire you into a food processor.” This time the computer remained silent. “Well, computer? What are ye doing?” “Scanning personnel records of Montgomery Scott to project hypothetical level of technical proficiency in the reconstruction of organic material synthesizers from duotronic components.” “And ... ?” The computer reset its audio circuits. It sounded like someone clearing her throat. “Message as dictated reads: ‘Effective immediately, I wish to tender my resignation from Star—.’ Please proceed.”

I can definitely see Scotty being able to do that.