Terms and Conditions (Dreamland Billionaires, #2)

by Lauren Asher

My eyes bulge as he shoves a spoon full of cake into my open mouth. “I finally found the perfect way to shut you up.” I glare at him as I taste the most delicious dessert I’ve ever had. His gaze remains glued to my lips as he drags the clean spoon past them. “All I need to do is keep your mouth permanently occupied.” I graciously proceed to choke.

Woww slow down

She instantly becomes interested in looking at anything but my face. What I’d pay to hear a second of her thoughts. Millions. Maybe even billions.

Anyone who wants to pay me for hearing my thoughts?

“Are you in love with her?” The question comes out far more agitated than I’d like. His eyes brighten as he laughs. “No.” “For some reason, I’m finding that hard to believe.” Based on the way he speaks of her, I would be stupid to think they were solely platonic. “We kissed once.” Blood rushes to my ears, and I can feel the tips turning red. “You what?” The lethality in my voice draws Cal’s eyes back to mine. “It was a mistake.” “It sure as fuck better be.” The glass tumbler beneath my hand shakes from how hard I grip the cylinder.

🤭

“Kiss her again and I’ll enjoy ripping your tongue from your throat.” He holds up his hands. “The only reason I told you about our kiss is so that you can stop thinking I want to make a move on her. I’m not interested in her like that. Trust me.” “Because the kiss was terrible,” I repeat back in a voice erased of any emotion. “Because she was never meant to be mine in the first place.” Damn right she wasn’t. Fake marriage or not, Iris is destined to be with one man and one man only. Me.

It’s too soon for thattt😭😭

“My mom liked drinking them on race days.” He says it so casually, like he didn’t just talk about his mom for the first time ever. He drinks mimosas because they remind him of his mom.

“I don’t hate dogs! What kind of monster do you take me for?” “The kind who actually enjoys working for my brother.”

“I can assure you that I will always have Iris’s best interests at heart.” Even if they jeopardize mine.

“Careful, Iris, your husband bites.”

“You look good on your knees, Mr. Kane.”

“Nobody important.” “Good, then at least no one will miss him when he’s dead.”

“You have such a foul mouth.” “Is it just me or do you seem to have an unhealthy obsession with my mouth lately?” “Who says it’s unhealthy?” Oh. My. Lord.

What has gotten into you? Toes curling? Next thing you know, you’ll be swapping out your abstinence card for a healthy dose of Declan’s dick. Stop thinking about his dick!

“If you try to leave me again, I’ll make you regret it.” The slight rasp in his voice does something catastrophic to my lower half. “Is that a threat?” “It’s a promise.”

He doesn’t need anyone. Cal’s voice plays on repeat in my head. Except maybe me.

Maybe I am losing it because why else would I care? You hate when she cries. You wouldn’t mind murdering someone who hurt her. You took her to the hospital even though you despise them with every fiber of your being.

You care about her. Fuck.

Instead of resorting to violence, because we all know how that went last time, I text my knight in shining Armani.

Lmfao

Plan a fake date, they said. It’ll be easy. Said no one ever.

“Then settle down, Romeo. This is a romance, not a porno.”

Tell that to the rest of the men out there😒🥲

“So, I was thinking…” I speak louder, gaining the attention of my target. “That can never be a good thing.” I laugh as I shove his shoulder. “Shut up. We both know you actually like my brain.” “I like your heart more.”

Except I don’t want to be her friend. Not when she elicits all these feelings inside of me that are nothing close to platonic. Who said you can’t be both?

“I’m enjoying the view.” She glances out the window. “Says the man who hasn’t even looked outside once.” “That’s not the view I’m talking about.”

🤭

“I’m not confused. Far from it, actually. I know exactly what I want.” “And what is that?” “You.”

Woah

“Oh my God. Are you actually suggesting that we hook up?” I’ve always been a straight shooter—to a fault. “Yes.” “Why?”

Bro…treat her better before asking her for rambazamba that’s basic human knowledge

Our marriage might be fake, but these feelings burning inside me are anything but. It’s only a matter of time before I make her mine. She just doesn’t know it yet.

Wuhuuu

“Oh, I’m sure she does. But that’s where you come in.” “And do what exactly?” His frail lips break out into a genuine smile. “You chase.”

Chase what? Fish on land? Or the woman?

Bullshit. You’ve always been interested in her.

“Yuánfèn.”

Starved for his attention? Maybe you do have workplace Stockholm syndrome after all.

“Strikhedonia1.”

I have that way tooooo much.

“You look…” He pauses. “If you say nice, I swear I’ll make your death look like an accident.” “Devastating.”

My fingers graze the soft curve of her ass. A groan gets trapped in my throat as she jolts forward to avoid my fingers, all to run right into my now hardening cock. Her wide eyes blink up at me. “Please tell me that’s a phone in your front pocket.”

“It’s a shame you don’t laugh like that more often.” I lift my hand and cup her chin. “Maybe I finally have a reason to.”

She smiles up at me. “You’re not dancing.” I’m not sure I’m even breathing.

“Fine, Mr. Food Network. Why don’t you show me how it’s done?” “Did it hurt to swallow your pride?” “Ehh. I’ve swallowed worse.” His nostrils flare. Iris: 1. Declan: 0.

“What are you doing?” “Helping my wife.” My throat bobs. “You’re growing a bit too comfortable with that nickname for my liking.” “I use it to remind you of your place.” “And what’s that?” “Mine.”

“You’re an only child. You can’t even begin to understand what it is like to grow up with siblings always stealing your stuff and copying you.” “I wish! That seems a whole lot better than spending your entire life alone.”

I mean I’m an only child so I don’t know it is living with children, but I will forever say it’s worse having no siblings(especially if your parents are chronic workaholics) then not having them

“You’re a crazy plant lady.” “Please. I haven’t officially earned that title until I have a greenhouse of my own.” “Do you want one?” “A greenhouse?” “Are the pesticides in here getting to your head or are you just struggling to comprehend what I’m asking?”

“Are you insane?” “When it comes to you, that was never a question.”

“If you want her to fall in love with you, you have to prove to her how you’re different from all the men she has dated before.” “That can’t be too hard. They were all disgustingly average in every single way.” “Unfortunately for you, you fall into the same category.”

There he goes again with the L-word. It could explain my insane need to keep Iris close and protect her from harm’s way. The way my chest feels all tight when she is gone. How my heart beats faster whenever she is in the same room as me. My intense need to mind my words so I don’t hurt her. Shit. I am falling in love with Iris.

Whoever said the truth will set you free is a dumbass.

“Stop fighting and give me ten minutes.” “You don’t deserve ten seconds, let alone ten minutes of my time.” “How about ten words then?” I laugh. “I’d like to see you try.” “I am falling in love with you, Iris Elizabeth Kane.”

“Ask me why I hate when people use Times New Roman instead of Arial.” “Are you serious right now? What does that have to do with any of this?” “Because I chose it for you.” “I’m sorry, what?” “I read somewhere online that sans serif fonts are easier for people with dyslexia to read, so I changed my requirements.

“Want to know why I kept the cactus?” I nod. “Because it was the first time someone got me a present that made me laugh.”

“Just because you make selfish choices doesn’t mean you’re a selfish person.

“This could be a disaster, but I’m willing to try.”

“I couldn’t care less about anyone else’s happiness besides your own.”

“When it comes to you, I’m not opposed to using any means necessary.” “Including torture?” He cups my cheek and draws me toward him. “Is it still considered torture if I let you come?” “I’ve unlocked a sexed-up monster.”

“And he’s my husband. Don’t make me choose between you two.” My world seems to tilt as she says the words. The weight behind them nearly knocks me on my ass, and I grip the handles of my chair in a chokehold.