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As he pulls me in closer, I can’t help but notice how well we fit together, how perfectly we mold even though we’re opposites in every other way. I’m disorganized. He’s a clean freak. I’m a romantic. He’s a cynic. I’m an extrovert. He’s the dictionary definition of a recluse. I want my future to involve love and family. He’s adamant about spending the rest of his days alone. But here, with him holding me, we don’t feel all that different.
“Nah. No need to be jealous when I know what’s mine. I’m the one you’re going home with.”
My little clean freak.
“Because I like taking care of people. You,
And I think I’d like to give the real me to Ryan if he wants it. I think he’d treat my heart with kindness.
It’s too right, having her here. This is where she belongs, with me, in this apartment. And if she thinks for a second she’s moving out, she’s out of her goddamn mind.
“So, are we done with the whole bullshit conversation about you moving out?”
“But I spend a lot of your money.”
“Someone needs to.”
“And I’m messy. You don’t l...
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“I like your ...
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“And I’m needy. I have no idea how ...
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“Good. I don’t want you to be alone. I want you ...
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“Come home with me, Blue.”
“Take me home, Shay.”
“I want you, Ryan. I’ve always wanted you, but I didn’t know I could be so lucky to have you.”
“Then kiss me, Blue.”
“Are you just pretending?”
“I stopped pretending a long time ago, Ind.”
“All I can think about is seeing you smile and trying to be the reason you are.”
“I fucking love kissing you.”
I love this kind of control. He’s a strong man, but weak for me.
“If you want to wait, we can wait, but Ryan, I’ve never wanted anything or anyone more than I want you.”
I tried so hard to deny it. I had fully convinced myself there wasn’t a woman in the world that would change me, distract me, remind me of everything I once wanted. But in walked Indy Ivers, my living, breathing distraction, and I’m too weak a man to pretend as if she’s not single-handedly repairing all the broken pieces.
I thought I had loved someone once, but if this is what it’s supposed to feel like, now I know my heart was never fully invested before.
I loved the idea of the life I thought I was going to have, but with Indy, even if we spend the rest of our days just the two of us in this apartment, I’d die a ...
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“I know you wanted this to be easy, but I can’t do casual with you. I’m in way too fucking deep to pretend you’re not it for me.”
“I don’t want casual.”
“I never have, not with you. I’m sorry I let you believe that. You’ve been like a flash of lightning straight to my heart and I’ve been d...
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“No. Because it’s become clear as day that you’re meant for me.”
“Are you begging, Shay?”
like you controlled for everyone else, but I want you unhinged for me.”
“Can you be that for me?”
“I can be anything for y...
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She’s so goddamn stunning and smart and she wants me.
“I knew it,” I say breathlessly against her ear.
“Knew what?”
“That you were meant for me. Do you feel how perfectly...
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Watching her, an overwhelming sense of emotion burns the back of my eyes. I find myself on the verge of crying like a little bitch because for the first time in four years I’m not thinking about anything other than how much I want this woman. I feel free. I feel like myself again.
Every muscle is tight as I work our bodies together, but mentally I’ve never felt more at peace. Never felt so right as I do at this moment. Never felt so in tune to another person as I do her. There’s no mistaking what’s happening. No one is fucking. This is too special, too connected to call it fucking.
“You didn’t have to say anything. I already know. And I’m the talker in this relationship, in case you forgot, but today, I only have three words I need to say.”
“I love you.”
My home, my heart, all of it, is with you.
“I’m sorry someone let you believe you were hard to love, because, Blue, it’s the easiest thing I’ve ever done.”
“God, I love you. I think in a way, I’ve loved you since our first breakfast together. You brought me back to life, Ind, and I will love you as long as you’ll let me.”
“You know that jersey you’ve got with my last name on it? When you see it hanging there in your closet, let it serve as a reminder to you, that soon enough, it’ll be her last name too.”
Blue. Ind. Baby when we’re in bed. Mrs. Shay is another I’d like to add to the list in the future.
“What do you want me to call you then?”
“You can call me yours.”