Just Like Someone Without Mental Illness Only More So: A Memoir

by Mark Vonnegut Md

chapter 2 Raised by Wolves The biggest gift of being unambiguously mentally ill is the time I’ve saved myself trying to be normal.

cransom@gmail.com

A human without a disease is like a ship without a rudder. I cleaned up my diet, avoided sugar and caffeine,

Being normal with a vengeance was a big step up from being mentally ill, but it wasn’t without its problems.

Everyone needs reassurance that the beast has been contained. If you’re going to go nuts over and over, why bother to get an education, a job, or a date for Saturday night?

Having a not entirely reasonable expectation that things will go well turns out to be exactly the sort of delusion that increases your chances for success in this world,

There was a chip on my shoulder the size of Montana, but nobody noticed.

I was a goddamned panzer division.

I’ll never know if a less disciplined, less vigilant, less muscular me would have done as well. I was burning the candle at too many ends and getting away with it.

Note to self: Being Kurt’s son, being an ex–mental patient, getting into Harvard, having written a book, and being a doctor are all things that in and of themselves do not make a life. If you lean on them too hard, you’ll find that there’s not much there. But if you add up enough things that aren’t in and of themselves enough, it almost starts to add up to something.…