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Life is a process during which your weakest places are inevitably discovered. It is also a process during which you are punished for your earlier actions and desires. Not punished justly, oh no— that is part of what I mean by not believing in the gods—simply punished like that. Punished anarchically, if you like.
It is not so much that I do not want, as that I do not want to want. I do not desire to desire. And I will say this: I am perhaps now as happy as in the years when I did desire. I am less occupied, less preoccupied, but no less happy. Or no less unhappy.