Schneider found that what patients want most from doctors isn’t autonomy per se; it’s competence and kindness. Now, kindness will often involve respecting patients’ autonomy, assuring that they have control over vital decisions. But it may also mean taking on burdensome decisions when patients don’t want to make them, or guiding patients in the right direction when they do. Even when patients do want to make their own decisions, there are times when the compassionate thing to do is to press hard: to steer them to accept an operation or treatment that they fear, or forgo one that they’d pinned
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