Everyone Communicates, Few Connect: What the Most Effective People Do Differently

by John C. Maxwell

Talk is easy. Everybody talks. The question is, how can you make your words count?

CONNECTING CAN MAKE YOU OR BREAK YOU

It’s not enough just to work hard. It’s not enough to do a great job. To be successful, you need to learn how to really communicate with others.

if you want to succeed, you must learn how to connect with others.

CONNECTING IS KEY

I am convinced more than ever that good communication and leadership are all about connecting.

Connecting is the ability to identify with people and relate to them in a way that increases your influence with them.

“The number one criteria for advancement and promotion for professionals is an ability to communicate effectively.”3 That means connecting!

CONNECTING IS CRUCIAL FOR LEADERS

Connecting is crucial whether you’re trying to lead a child or a nation.

Connecting is vital for any person who wants to achieve success. It is essential for anyone who wants to build great relationships.

THE DESIRE TO CONNECT

When you connect with others, you position yourself to make the most of your skills and talents.

God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change,

courage to change the things we can, and wisdom to know the difference.

MORE TALK ISN’T THE ANSWER

No matter what your goals are, connecting can help you.

“Those who build great companies understand that the ultimate throttle on growth for any great company is not markets, or technology, or competition, or products. It is the one thing above all others—the ability to get and keep enough of the right people.”

The ability to connect with others begins with understanding the value of people.

HIGH ACHIEVERS AVERAGE ACHIEVERS LOW ACHIEVERS Care About People as Well as Profits Concentrate on Production Are Preoccupied with Their Own Security View Subordinates Optimistically Focus More on Their Own Status Show a Basic Distrust of Subordinates Seek Advice from Those Under Them Are Reluctant to Seek Advice from Those Under Them Don’t Seek Advice Listen Well to Everyone Listen Only to Superiors Avoid Communication and Rely on Policy Manuals

Focusing on others

Expanding your connecting vocabulary beyond just words

Marshalling your energy for connecting Gaining insight in how grea...

Finding common ground Making your communication simple Capturing people’s interest Inspiring them, and Being authentic.

CONNECTING PRINCIPLE: Connecting increases your influence in every situation.

KEY CONCEPT: The smaller the group, the more important it is to connect.

CONNECTING ONE-ON-ONE

Talk more about the other person and less about yourself. Prepare two or three questions you can ask someone before a meeting or social gathering.

Acts of servanthood have a resounding impact that live longer than words.

CONNECTING IN A GROUP

To connect with a group, you must take initiative with the people in the group. To do that, do the following: • Look for ways to compliment people in the group for their ideas and actions. • Look for ways to add value to people in the group and what they’re doing. • Don’t take credit when the group succeeds, and don’t cast blame when it fails. • Find ways to help the group celebrate successes together.

CONNECTING WITH AN AUDIENCE

Meanwhile, here are four things you can do to connect with an audience:

Let your listeners know that you are excited to be with them. • Communicate that you desire to add value to them. • Let them know how they or their organization add value to you.

CONNECTING IS ALL ABOUT OTHERS

“If you will first help people get what they want, they will help you get what you want.”

I was trying to get ahead by correcting others when I should have been trying to connect with others.

Connecting is never about me.

If you want to connect with others, you have to get over yourself.

Maturity is the ability to see and act on behalf of others. Immature people don’t see things from someone else’s point of view. They rarely concern themselves with what’s best for others. In many ways, they act like small children.

Maturity is the ability to see and act on behalf of others.

Maturity does not always come with age; sometimes age comes alone.