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September 27 - October 23, 2019
The infant bar is approximately one and a half to two inches in diameter and fourteen inches from the floor.)
We want to help children realize that when they leave someone or something, the gain can more than offset the loss. In this way, we transform the child’s experience of attachment and separation into a process that enhances trust and security in life.
This is the time to begin the habit of a daily walk with your child. This walk should be a meandering one, one that follows the child’s mission, not the adults. The child stops to inspect everything. The purpose of the child’s walk, then, is not to get more exercise. The
Just as the legs have remained bare to facilitate movement and sensorial awareness, so should the feet be bare whenever feasible from the time that the infant pulls herself up to stand.
When shoes are necessary for the child’s protection, such as in public places or going out for walks, choose those with flexible soles to minimize constriction and those that have reasonable traction.
This is a habit of discipline that should be established as early as possible
Asking the child to hold our hand for short periods in public places is an opportunity to help her accept necessary limits in her life.
The habit of “indoor manners,” consisting of quiet voices and no running about, helps young children to develop awareness of their environment and respect for other people. Such controlled behavior in public places can only be introduced to very young children if they are on their own two feet, yet within our reach.
Balanced walking not only frees her hands to carry objects, it also enables her to use her hands for work in structured activities. Thus she is ready to be part of the culture around her. She moves into high gear, propelled to action. She realizes that she is capable of her own learning, and works and works for mastery. She is frustrated often, as she tries to develop each new skill. She is excited about life, and it is hard to sleep.
Now in this new period of independent movement, it is “to conquer the environment.” For this purpose, children want to “do what they can as soon as they can.” More than merely conquering their own bodies as before, now they must master the world.
toys will not do. The child needs items that are real and relate directly to the adults everyday activities. Montessori called these items the practical-life materials.
She suggested making the child the adults daily companion in these simple activities of home and family for one reason only: out of respect for the possibilities of human life as found in the small child.
when parents are uncertain about how to respond to their child involved in a practical-life activity, they need to remember that collaboration is the basis of all healthy human relationships.
commenting or clapping for children’s accomplishments can break their absorption with the experience and draw their attention to you.
Further, parental cheerleading, if overdone, can interfere with the child’s independence and create the expectation of an audience for even normal accomplishment.
At any age, developing an inflated idea of self leads eventually to isolation and loneliness. Our goal is to help children appreciate that they are unique human beings and special to us. However, we want them to realize that all other human beings are unique, too.
they cannot be rushed. When we fall into the trap of trying to be the perfect parent of the perfect child, we inevitably become overly controlling, trying to push him for accomplishment. The eventual result is a tense child and a “put upon” parent. We
Very young children cannot tell us directly that they are tired or bored or can no longer concentrate. They do so by getting silly or disintegrating into fantasy or becoming destructive. We need to be alert to these messages and help the child by responding promptly and firmly.
Always choose the simplest materials possible for your child’s use. One of our goals is to help children understand the world and how it works. Children need to see what is happening with the objects they are using.
Organize each activity with its own basket or tray of materials.
The exactness and order of careful folding have a special appeal for very young children.
When the child says, “I don’t want to,” you can respond, “Let’s do it together.”
We discover that the child’s interest in mastering skills for personal care peaks somewhere between twelve months and two years.
This period is sometimes referred to as the “time of self-affirmation” for the child; more often it is called “the terrible twos.”
We are impatient with the learning period the child requires for gaining any new knowledge or skill. We tend to skip the critical stage of the child’s prolonged practice and collaboration with us. We go directly from presenting the way to do something, to expecting that the child can do it.
In every act of personal care, keep thinking, “Is there a step that I am taking away from my child that she could do for herself?”
We know that “struggle is good” and that she is in a period when exerting maximum effort appeals to her. On the other hand, when healthy struggle is about to turn into frustration, we know that we need to step in.
It does not help children, however, to draw attention back to ourselves through applause or excessive comment. As we have discussed, self-confidence for all of us is a result of our genuine achievements, not someone else’s assessment of them. Adults cannot give children self-esteem. They must earn it for themselves through their own efforts.
Children over three years old should not typically sleep more than one hour in their afternoon nap. Doing so can interfere with their day-night sleep pattern.
The more faithful parents are to setting a firm hour for going to bed, the better are the chances that their children will be able to get to sleep on their own and sleep well through the night.
new mothers try to overextend themselves, either to please others or to bolster their feelings of adequacy in this vulnerable time. Fathers need to help them keep reality and expectation in balance.
one of the benefits of having a new baby in the house is just so that the older children can learn to accept and deal with their jealousy in productive ways.
Introduce a fork when the baby is twelve to fourteen months old.
As in all activities with young children, allow for cooperation. Ask for it and wait for it with patience.
Buy shirts that open at the top or are a few sizes too large so that they fit easily over the baby’s head. Turtlenecks are a poor selection for a child under five because they are difficult for her to put on by herself. Pants should have elastic all the way around the waist. Avoid sweat pants with tight cuffs at the ankles; they also are difficult for the child to get on and off.
After the child is too old to wear shoes with flexible soles (as advocated in Chapter 5), the best allaround shoe is a simple, low-cut tennis shoe. Not only are boots, high-top shoes, sandals, and party shoes difficult for children to put on and take off, but loose buckles and leather soles are a safety hazard.
Young children can handle two options; three is too many.
For even an eight-year-old, four to six pairs of pants, four to six shirts, one pair of sneakers for school with the almost outgrown pair saved for outside in the yard, one good dress or good pair of trousers, and one pair of dress shoes are enough.
The myelination of neurons necessary to ready the body for control of bowels and bladder is completed by the time children are approximately twelve months old.
To help your child realize that the bathroom is the natural place for human waste, always clean and change her in the bathroom after the early months.
The child’s Sensitive Period of interest in toileting occurs between twelve and eighteen months of age.
With most personal grooming activities you need to alternate turns with your child. After your child makes her attempt, say, “Now it is my turn,” without mentioning that her turn did not quite do the job.
Our story of developing language and intelligence in the child, then, involves both the capacity for symbolic thought and the skills of communication.
once a vocabulary of fifty words is reached, a breakthrough occurs and the child begins to learn new words every day. This vocabulary explosion, occurring in most children between the ages of twelve and twenty-four months,
You do not need to be concerned with correction. Children strive to copy the language they hear about them. Restating their phrases or repronouncing their words without additional comment is sufficient help for them.
weeks, we help him to begin the journey to symbolic representation by introducing small replicas of real objects—a stuffed animal or doll that portrays realistic facial features and balanced bodily proportions,
When the child is approximately eighteen months old and his hands and fingers are sufficiently developed through discovering the real items of his environment (see Chapter 4), we can give him miniature objects to explore:
“What is this?” This latter question represents a test of the child’s knowledge. Therefore, it is introduced only after repeating the first two steps many, many times—both of which involve your naming of the object for him.
Repetition over many days or weeks, even months, is the key to helping them develop in this area.
the number of books available should be limited: four is the maximum for a child two years old.
