Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone

by Mark Goulston

Here’s my favorite version of the Power Thank You. It was inspired by Heidi Wall, filmmaker and co-founder of the Flash Forward Institute, and it has three parts: Part 1: Thank the person for something specific that he or she did for you. (It can also be something the person refrained from doing that would have hurt you.) Part 2: Acknowledge the effort it took for the person to help you by saying something like: “I know you didn’t have to do _______” or “I know you went out of your way to do_______.” Part 3: Tell the person the difference that his or her act personally made to you. Here’s an example of the Power Thank You in action. DONNA, A MANAGER, SPEAKING TO A SUBORDINATE: Larry, do you have a sec? LARRY: Sure. What’s up? DONNA: Nothing. I just wanted to take a minute to thank you for handling the Bennett account so well when I was out of the office for my emergency surgery. LARRY: Hey, no problem. I was glad to help. DONNA: Actually, I’m sure it did create some problems for you. I know you were counting on taking your kids to the soccer semi-finals and I heard from your coworkers that instead you spent the whole weekend in the office boning up on the details of the account. I don’t think many people would have rearranged their schedules so willingly—and I doubt that most people could carry off a meeting with Bennett as brilliantly as you did. LARRY: Well, thanks. I was a little worried about it all, but I’m glad we pulled it off. DONNA: Don’t kid yourself. You pulled ...