Since the most common complaint among surviving siblings has to do with insensitive remarks, let's begin with what not to say to a bereaved sibling (or any grieving person, for that matter). Topping the list of things to avoid saying are such well-worn expressions as “He's in a better place” and “At least he's not suffering any more.” Along the same lines, I recall several people urging me to “Cheer up. Your brother wouldn't want you to feel so sad.” (Gee, if you shouldn't feel sad when your brother or sister dies, when should you feel sad?)
