“Hey, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. I remember the first time I rode a rollercoaster. I screamed like a fuckin’ banshee. Between you and me, I may have had a skid mark in my skivvies when I exited the ride.” Faris roared with laughter at my admission. “So not only do you scream like a girl, you’re telling me you have a loose butthole? Wow. I can’t—” “Excuse me, what?” I snapped. “My butthole is not loose.” “You literally just said you shat yourself,” he said slowly like he was talking to a dumbass. “That isn’t what—”
