The Art of Learning: An Inner Journey to Optimal Performance

by Josh Waitzkin

Let’s put ourselves in the shoes of the mother of a talented young chess player I know named Danny. This seven-year-old boy just loves chess. He can’t get enough. He studies chess for a half hour every day, plays on the Internet, and takes a lesson from an expert once a week. He has recently started competing in scholastic chess tournaments, and the mother finds herself swept away by the exciting atmosphere. She finds her own sense of well-being fluctuating with Danny’s wins and losses. This woman is a substantial, sensitive, intelligent person and she doesn’t want to put an extra burden on her son’s shoulders. She is aware of the entity/incremental dynamic and so when Danny loses, she wants to tell him it doesn’t matter. But obviously it does matter. He lost and is sad. To tell him it doesn’t matter is almost to insult his intelligence.

Parental training