I’m not sure whether my father will ever forgive me for the direction my life has taken. I’m not sure if he ever should. I am a disappointment. I have let him down so many times. I guess that’s another reason I don’t want to call my dad. I’m scared of taking on the responsibility of having a relationship with him. I never want to hurt him again by building up his hopes and then smashing them all to pieces. I’ve done that so many times.
