What does it mean to love someone “as yourself” in marriage? It means three things: you so deeply identify with your spouse that you feel the effects of your own behavior on your spouse, you think first of making your spouse’s life better, and you want the best for your spouse even when your spouse can’t see what that is.
as I’ve pointed out many times: suddenly our behavior affects the other person, yet we are told that we aren’t responsible for each other’s feelings.
