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1. What do you see as my major personality strengths? 2. What do you see as my marketable skills? 3. What kind of environment do you see me working in? 4. What do you think I need in a job? 5. What do you see in me that I probably don’t see in myself?
Ask from 4 ppl.
FINDING YOUR MOTIVATIONAL PATTERN
Do this
God, give me guts. —ANONYMOUS
Write these down
You must let go of where you are to get to where you want to go.
“when I do what’s right for me, the universe supplies something. It never fails.”
“I really believe by cutting back I opened a new door which earned me more money,” Bette explained. “That was a revelation for me—that you have to close certain doors to open new ones.”
In every spiritual discipline, the master’s first task is to tear down the novice’s view of the world. In Zen, the metaphor most often used is the overflowing teacup. We must first empty the container before we can refill it. Similarly, if our minds are full of limiting thoughts, there’s no room for the expansive ones. Success can only come when there’s space
I’ll always have that fear of hurting people. The only thing I can do is be aware of it and march forward sensitively and with determination.”
“We fear that if we relinquish our stuff, even if it is getting in our way, there will be nothing left of us. This is the primary reason that letting go is so difficult,” says Susanna McMahon in the Portable Therapist. “The other reason is we’re still trying to please our parents.”
The key here is to listen to our intuitive urgings instead of our preconceived notions about what’s practical or reasonable.
profit motive.
My motives:
- have a life with sachin free of worries about how much we are spending
- never have to rely on my family for financial support
- give as much money as i want to any cause
Phil Laut describes what he calls the Earning Law. “All wealth is created by the human mind. Increasing your wealth is a matter of increasing the quality of your thoughts.”
paraphrasing Peter DeVries, “‘I only write when I’m inspired, and I make sure I’m inspired every morning at nine A.M.’”
“I chose to be in their game. Can you imagine going to a football game and saying to the players, ‘I want to play but don’t tackle so hard.’ Once you’re in the game, and you agree to play you can’t think you’re going to change it. My business is a tough business.” All business is tough. And as you climb higher, the stakes get bigger, the game gets tougher.
politician Adlai Stevenson told us years ago: “Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.”
“I had to make myself believe that rejection was just what I needed to succeed,” Sheila explained. “I made up my mind that the more rejection I was willing to handle, the more successful I would be. I learned to use it to my advantage.”
It’s fascinating how big a difference a mental turnaround can make, which proves an important point. The game is, after all, only a game. And games, we all know, should be fun.
Being cast as a bitch when they’re acting confident and bold has even subdued some of the highest earners. Women by nature are relationship-driven. As much as we hate to admit it, our need to be liked and our fear of rejection will often inhibit us from taking a stand. What a pity. Trying to please everyone is always a formula for failure.
Another formula for failure is to assume that others should recognize our talent and know what we want. Way too many women hold this belief. Consequently, they don’t ask for what they want, or they resent having to do so.
one day, when two people Beth didn’t want as clients asked her rate, she doubled it. “They both said yes. I suddenly realized how vastly underpriced I was. So the next time I had new clients ask my price, I doubled it again. And I kept doubling it until I started losing clients.”
Carol Anderson did: “One of my objectives was to make more money working less time. So I started this experiment of raising my rates five hundred or a thousand dollars for each new project. People gave it to me without blinking an eye. It was such an insight. It made me realize that I didn’t know how to think big enough.”
When Rikki negotiated her contract with Court TV, she told the person she was dealing with exactly what she needed. “I gave them a number of points having to do with money, expenses, the status of a particular show, and the hours I would work. The advantage of having several items is you always have one or two that you can give up. If you just go in and say, ‘I need X dollars,’ then you have a problem.” (This negotiation strategy has been called the salami technique. Asking for slices of the salami, instead of the whole thing, increases the likelihood both parties will feel they’ve made a good
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Good negotiation tactics
Tom Cruise photo: “Yeah, they pay me a lot to make movies, but I’m worth it.” Those last three words became her reference point. “I’m going to act like that, even though lots of times I don’t believe it,”
“I told them that I was worth more, that I had another job offer, and that I had to make a financially responsible decision. They said, ‘OK, we’ll get back to you.’” She left the room doubtful that her demands would be met, but sure enough, “they came back with four hundred thousand.”
An alternative to walking away is shutting up or adopting what one writer called the “Hmmm” response. (Instead of replying yes or no to an offer, simply nod thoughtfully and say “Hmmm.” “The ‘Hmmm’ response can drop another ten grand in the bank for highlevel executives,” claims Jack Chapman,
“I’ve learned that silence is often mistaken for wisdom,” observed Ruth Harenchar, an accounting firm executive. “I’m a very outgoing person, but I’ve learned that there are times when nodding sagely and sitting quietly is a very good maneuver.”
Asking for more is an act of self-love. Saying no is a show of self-respect. Refusing to settle is a statement of self-worth. And walking away is a sign of self-trust.
I’ve not ceased being fearful. I’ve gone ahead despite the pounding in my heart that says: turn back, turn back, you’ll die if you go too far. —ERICA JONG
Success is the child of audacity. —BENJAMIN DISRAELI
The philosopher Søren Kierkegaard once declared, “To dare is to lose one’s footing momentarily; to not dare is to lose one’s self.”
I’ve driven home saying, ‘Where is your brain? You don’t know how to do this.’” That’s how she came to write her latest book, Investing Beyond.Com. “I knew nothing about the Internet when the publisher asked me to write it, but I was passionate about learning.”
If it’s not illegal or immoral, find a way to get it done.
hedge-fund manager Renee Haugerud, when she quoted a statement from The Road Less Traveled, by Scott Peck: “Dare to be God.” “I tell that to every young woman I meet. Dare to be God. Dare to be all you can be. Dare to make a decision, even if it’s wrong. Dare to make something of your life, even if you fail.” Then, after pausing briefly, she added, “We need to keep success and failure in perspective. As Rudyard Kipling said: ‘When you meet triumph and failure, treat them alike, as the imposters they both are.’”
“I often look back on that when I have tough things to accomplish and I think, If I could do that, I can do anything.”
as they say in twelve-step programs, “‘Do the action and the feeling will follow,’” another woman said. “I’m convinced you don’t get over the anxiety and then take the action. You can’t wait around to feel good. You take the action and the feeling follows.”
St. Francis of Assisi had some great advice for venturing into the discomfort zone: “Start by doing what’s necessary, then what’s possible, and suddenly you’re doing the impossible.”
Committee of 200, a powerful group of the country’s top female business owners
Resource mentors
“The people who get out of their comfort zone,” Susan Bishop told me, “are the people who have the confidence to do what it takes, not once but over and over again.”
If you focus on all that can go wrong, don’t be surprised if everything does. If instead you make a deliberate effort when life hands you lemons to find the blessings in the batch of bitter fruit, imagine how your attitudes will change, and your reality with it.
“I hate to sound egotistical,” an entrepreneur said with sincerity, “but I truly believe I can do anything I put my mind to. I didn’t become like this overnight. All those tough experiences made me who I am.”
Every blade of grass has an angel that bends over it and whispers: Grow! Grow! —TALMUD Hasten to that which supports. —I CHING
“I consider coming from a really difficult family of alcoholics a tremendous gift,” one entrepreneur explained. “I know I can survive anything so I’m not afraid to fail.”
Relate back to us surviving Papa's resistance and pain he caused himself and in turn all of us. We can survive anything & come out better because of it. I developed even more patience, empathy and how to push tgrough difficult times.
same with my childhood depression experience.
The combination of the roles, the True Believer and the Way Shower, inspirer and instructor, mentor and role model, created a synergy that fostered their aspirations, replenished their spirits, fueled their efforts, and bolstered their self-esteem despite snowballing doubts and endless hurdles.
“I went to work for him as a secretary and it changed my life. He was an esteem builder. He gave me the confidence I needed for the rest of my life. I watched him, absorbed everything. He guided me on how to be a better salesperson, that calling is the key to sales. He was a great role model.”
When you’re unconditionally loved, you can do anything. I never doubted I could become anything I chose to be.”
The second way we can trip up is in failing to recognize or appreciate these angels of support when they do cross our paths. To benefit from support, you must be receptive. That means you have to consciously allow people who care into your world. And, equally important, you have to listen to what they say and take their words to heart.
Heidi Robertson told me about “a wonderful nurturing group of female executives, typically the highest placed in their organizations. Every year we have an ‘appraise your life’ evening where we look at things like: What is giving you joy? What is impeding your life? What are you going to do to put more joy in your life? It is the most loving and nurturing experience that I can think of. It’s been very helpful.”
It’s not what we have but what we do with what we have that gives us or denies us financial security.
a story of a Zen monk who, when asked the secret of Buddha’s smile, replied, “It can only be that he smiles at himself for searching all those years for what he already possesses.”
