These Infinite Threads (This Woven Kingdom, #2)

by Tahereh Mafi

“The sky, too, is soft,” she said. “Yet all who fall into its arms will perish.”

Oh, she had never feared death. No, it was life that scared her, life that scarred her.

Unexpectedly, Cyrus smiled. For the first time since she’d met the reprobate, he truly smiled.

“God, you’re so beautiful,” he said, his smile vanishing. “Even when you lie to me.”

“My kingdom,” he said softly. “For your hand.”

“Somewhere safe.” “Safe?” she said, managing a small smile. “Even with you here?” It was a moment before he said, quietly, “Yes.” The nosta warmed.

She could’ve prevented this. If only she’d been more guarded, if only she hadn’t cared. If only Cyrus hadn’t turned out to be so very, very human. Slowly, Alizeh fell to her knees. She took Cyrus’s limp hand in hers, and, like a fool, she cried for him.

a pang in her heart, for the insensible organ had no brain and could not be reasoned with.

“I sat there for two hours while you suffered, and I used my own dress to wipe the blood from your face. I begged you to wake up. I begged you to bring us back to the palace –” “No,” he said, “no, you . . .” His voice trailed off as he looked at her – really looked at her

“Cyrus,” she said. “I didn’t leave you there.” He was breathing hard now, his body turning to stone before her. He seemed paralyzed by this revelation, astonished into speechlessness. Finally, he said, “That wasn’t a dream?” “No,” she whispered. “Fucking hell.”

“I just don’t understand,” he was saying. “How did you wash my face when we had no water?”

Nervously, she clasped her hands. “I did use my skirt to mop up most of the blood,” she said, fixing her eyes firmly on the floor. “But then – Then I used the moisture of my tears to scrub away the sticky residue.”

When he finally spoke, his voice was soft, his astonishment palpable. “You cried for me?” “It has been noted,” she whispered, “that I perhaps cry too much.” “You used your own tears,” he said, all but broken, “to wash the blood from my face?”

Cyrus had looked at her many times since she’d met him, and always with varying levels of intensity, but never quite like this. Never like he wanted to fall to his knees before her.

the more she wondered whether he stared at her now not with fear, but with longing.

What were you going to do? If I kissed you? What would come next?” “I would marry you,” he said, stepping closer again, coming dangerously within reach. “I’d marry you tomorrow.

And then I’d take you to bed. For weeks.” She felt her face heat, her heart pounding recklessly.

I should’ve doubted sooner, but you always struck me as far too lovely to be associated with him. So generous, so sweet. So beautiful I could hardly look at you, even in my dreams.

I wanted to discover your faults, your flaws. I thought you’d never match up to the figment of my dreams, and I was wrong. You are far more enchanting in real life. Far more exquisite.” His voice shook just a little when he said, softly, “It is excruciating to be in your presence.” Again, the nosta seared her skin.

“You’re being unfair,” she said, forcing herself to speak, her heart beating painfully in her chest. “You act as if I’m intentionally cruel. As if I’m indifferent to you.” “Aren’t you?” “No,” she whispered, her eyes filling with tears. “Of course not.”

“Then be with me,” he said softly. “Let me worship you.” “Oh, don’t do this,” she said, wiping angrily at her eyes. “This path is too perilous already, and we both know it. Don’t speak of things you cannot give me.” “You have no idea what I could give you,” he said, his own eyes blazing. “You have no idea what I want. I have been in agony for eight months, Alizeh. Do you know how hard it’s been to pretend I don’t know you? To pretend I don’t want you? To act as if I haven’t known every inch of your body in my dreams? To learn that your heart has been entangled elsewhere? I look at you and I can’t breathe. In my mind, you are already mine.”

“Stop,” she said, struggling now to catch her breath. “Don’t talk to me like this – This is dangerous, Cyrus –” “Then why tell me you care?” he countered. “Why tell me you feel something only to dismiss me? Do you think it’s easy for me to stand here before you and speak so candidly?

But how can you ask me to trust you with my heart when you still keep secrets from me? When you are beholden to the darkest creature alive, forsaking all others for him, placing his wishes, his demands, above all else?” She shook her head. “No, I could never be with you,” she said. “Not because I am indifferent, but because you could never be faithful to me – you could never choose me first – and you should not blame me for my fears.”

He went quite still then, doing nothing to mask the agony printed upon his face. “I might, one day, be free.” “Maybe,” she allowed. “Until then, you could not know what he might ask of you. You might break me just to please him.”

“You wouldn’t touch me. Or laugh with me. You wouldn’t share my bed.” Her heart was beating in her throat. “No.” “Alizeh, you would make me the most wretched man alive.” “I’m sorry,” she said, shaking her head as she spoke. “I’m desperately sorry.”