After Rain Falls (River of Rain, #2)

by C.E. Ricci

“I might have you, but you own me. Every inch. Every thought. Every moment of every day, Abhainn. You own me.”

He’s mine. Only mine. Just like I’m his. And I know now, we’re no longer an almost. We’re everything.

“It didn’t matter to me, us not being together. I didn’t care if we were never going to be together again. I just had to do it.” He pauses and searches my face, his eyes expressing just as much as his words. “Your name was already inscribed on my heart and etched in my soul. The only place it was missing was inked on my skin.”

“You might be the muse, but there’s no reason you can’t also be the canvas.”

“When the person you’re meant to be with is tossed in your path, you grab them and hold on for dear life. And I don’t care how old we are. You hear it all the time about some people meeting their soulmate at the age of five or whatever. Who’s to say we can’t at twenty-one?”

There’s a cleansing that comes after rain falls. This sense of peace that blankets your surroundings. That brings more possibilities and gives way to new beginnings. In a way, it’s hope.

“You’ve already had so much pain,” he whispers. “You don’t need mine too.” “I want it though. The same way I know you want mine.” His eyes dart between mine, and he nods again. “Then it’s yours.”

“Sometimes forever...is shorter than you think.”

“No. River, no. You made me fall in love with you. I fought so hard not to, but I never stood a chance. It was always you, Abhainn. So you don’t get to leave me here alone.”

hope I did it so he can feel it. So he can know. That I love him, too. Because I do. I love him with every inch of my being. He’s everything I could have asked for, everything I didn’t know to ask for. He’s the forever I didn’t know I wanted, even if we won’t get it now. He has to know that.

“I’m sorry, mo grá. I’m so fucking sorry. For the lies and the secrets. For bringing this into your life. I’m sorry for all of it,” I tell him, the words suffocating me because saying them out loud...it feels like goodbye. The forever kind. And I’m not equipped to handle that right now.

I hold his body in my arms, begging for God to take me instead. I scream at Him, plead with Him. I bargain my fucking soul, letting those in heaven and hell decide where it belongs. Because he isn’t fucking dying. Not today. Not until we’re one hundred and five. Not until we’ve had a goddamn lifetime together. Like we promised.

“You die, I die too,” I murmur gruffly into his hair, barely more than a whisper tearing itself from my throat. “I go where you go, River. That’s what forever means.” And I know in that moment, I mean every word.

Because Rain has to love him. Because those three words aren’t ones you yell and shout to someone when they are dying in your arms while you helplessly watch. Because I’m listening to him beg and plead and bargain with God to save River and take himself instead. Because it’s what Rain was willing to do mere minutes ago for River. Die to save him. But River took those bullets instead. To save Rain.

And while he cries, I pray to whatever higher being there might be to save River. Fuck, I pray to River himself to get through this. He needs you. More than he’s ever needed me.

“From the beginning, this has never been more than a fucking love triangle to you. Thinking you can win me like I’m some sort of prize. A pissing contest. When in reality, you were right. Between you and River, there is no contest. It’s him, a thousand percent. Every day of every week of the rest of my fucking life, it’s him.”

I fought the war. And I lost. But I don’t even have it in me to be angry with him. We don’t choose who we love. So as I step through the door and into the hallway without a glance back in his direction, I pray I’m the only one who has to walk out of this hospital heartbroken.

Because without him? Fuck, it doesn’t even matter. I won’t survive in this world without him. Not anymore. I wouldn’t even want to try. Without him, I cease to exist.

“You don’t deserve my respect. Not after the way you’ve treated me since I was a freshman in high school. Like less than the dirt on your shoes. And what? All because there’s a possibility you might have a son-in-law instead of a daughter? Do you understand how fucking insane that is?”

“Then you can go. Leave. I don’t need your love or acceptance. I’ll have Mom and Willow and Rain—” Something between a grunt and a snort leaves him as I say Rain’s name. “That boy almost got you killed,” he retorts, ice in his tone. I grit my teeth. “That boy happens to be the love of my fucking life. And while love isn’t something deemed important to you, it is to me. And I’m not letting you sit here and tell me I can’t love him.”

“He is the person I plan to spend the rest of my life with. He is the person I can’t live without. And he is the person I willingly took two bullets for. So accept it or don’t, Dad. At this point, it doesn’t matter to me.” Swallowing roughly, I let out a shaking breath. “But if you can’t, I want nothing to do with you. I never want to see you—ever again. Because I don’t need to be reminded of what a disappointment my father truly is.”

But Rain, while he’s rough around the edges and so guarded and broken...he softened those edges eventually. For me. And he lets himself feel.

“And I want you,” I swallow harshly, my grip on his hair tightening. “I want you for the rest of my life.” “Is that a proposal, River Lennox?” he asks with a lilt of amusement in his voice. “I mean, you’re already my fiancé, so—” He glares daggers at me and I can’t help but grin like a damn idiot.

The one I got under his name. You keep me safe. It matches the one on his own inner wrist. You keep me wild.

Don’t live the rest of your lives looking over your shoulder. You don’t have to worry anymore.

“Because you fought for us at every turn, even when you had no reason to. Gave me hope for a better future. Held my hand and had my back and supported me through whatever life threw my way. And I want to do those things for you too. I want to spend the rest of my life making you as happy as you make me, if you’ll let me.”

“If I remember correctly, I told you there would be a day I’d bring you to your knees,” he mumbles against my mouth, biting at my lip. “But I guess I can live with just the one.”

If you think you’re lost, just follow the river. “I need you to remember this if nothing else,”

“You’re all I want. All I’ll ever need,” I tell him, my voice rough and filled with gravel. “And I swear to you, River. No matter what, I’ll follow you anywhere.”

Follow the River. 😭🖤

From this day forward, my only goal is to protect myself, my heart, and all these vile secrets.

Damn good send off into a spinoff series 👏🏼👏🏼