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My greatest regret in leaving you comes from my fear that you will spend the rest of your life in darkness. Please don’t, my darling. It would break my heart a million times to think of you never again experiencing all the joy that life has to offer. Your love for another does not diminish your love for me, and you honor my memory by allowing your heart to beat for another.
grief is the price we pay for love. Would you trade any of your pain if it meant we lost even a second of our time together? I know you well enough to know your answer. You would endure a thousand years of torment for one more kiss, one more dance, one more anything. Do not let fear of loss stop you from living, Lorenzo. And know, that no matter what you do, I will always be proud of you.
“Where do you want me, sunshine?” Back in Chicago? Or with your head between my thighs? I can’t decide. I go with neither of those responses though. “On the bed. Face down, please.”
“That is why we would never work, Lorenzo. Not because you still love your wife—of course you do—but because you have no idea who I am. For a man so intuitive to my emotions and my physical needs, you don’t actually know me at all.”
“I know you, Mia.”
“No.” I shake my head. “If you knew me, you’d know that I believe every person we love makes their mark on our hearts, shaping us into the people we become. You are the man you are because of Anya. Who knows if I would’ve even liked the man you were before her? But I love the man you are now. A...
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I’m sorry I can’t be the man you deserve, sunshine. But I will always be here if you ever need me. No matter what or when or why, call me and I’ll come. X
As it turns out, I still have a heart after all. It seems Mia Stone put it back together so quietly and carefully that I didn’t even notice until I felt it break all over again.
“I don’t want you, you fucking animal!” I screech, but he only laughs. “Tough shit, honey. I’m going to fuck you so hard you’ll forget about ever having another man between your legs.”
“If I make her stay … She’s like a ray of fucking sunshine, and I’m a huge fucking black hole. I’ll consume her with my darkness, D. I’ll fuck up her life, just like I fucked up Anya’s.”
“Good girl,” he growls before he rubs his nose along the column of my throat, inhaling deeply. “You smell so fucking delicious. I don’t know how I ever lived without you.”
He jerks away and gives me a wicked grin. “I can see I’m going to have so much fun playing with you, sunshine.” He tugs my panties off and wetness slicks between my thighs. “Hold out your hands,” he orders.
A thrill of excitement shoots through me. “You’ve tied me to your bed?” There’s a wicked glint in his eyes as he tugs on my restraints, making sure I can’t move my arms. “More like cuffed.” I arch an eyebrow at him. “Cuffed and tied up with panties?”
“Such a needy little sub,” he taunts, sinking his cock inside me once more.
“I want them to look up here and have no idea that I’m fucking you,” he says with a dark chuckle. “I want you to come in front of all these people, sunshine, but I don’t want them to know a thing about it.”
“Fuck, tesoro,” I groan in her ear. “Sei fottutamente perfetto.”
She cries out, clinging to me desperately. “I love you, Sir!”
Completely spent, obliterated by the love of this woman, I collapse on top of her, my head buried in the crook of her neck. The high starts to ebb away, and as it does, I’m hit with the realization that I just made love to a woman who isn’t my wife.
“This,” he says with a snarl. “This is all wrong.”
He runs his hands through his hair. “I’m sorry. But this—us. It can’t work.” “But it does work,” I remind him. “But it can’t!” he yells, morphing into a man that I don’t recognize, and I flinch. “I can’t do this, Mia. I’m sorry.” His tone is softer now, his head hung low—in defeat.
“You can do this. I know you’re feeling things, but just talk to me—” “It’s no good.” He steps back and sneers. “You need to get the hell out of here. Get the hell away from me. You were right when you said you deserve more than I can offer.”
Fighting tears, I stare into his eyes that are so full of shame and sorrow. “That was before I knew you were capable of—” He scoffs. “Capable of what? Of loving you?” Goddamn this stubborn asshole. “Yes!” I shout back. His mouth twists in a cruel sneer. “You think I could ever love you as much as I loved her, Mia? You will never be her. You will never be good enough. Is that how you want to live your life? Always second best?”
Except I could grant her everything she wants, couldn’t I? The wedding and the kids and the happily ever after—the entire beautiful fucking future I dreamed of last night after I made love to her like she was the other half of my fucking soul. We could have everything together. But why should I get a happily ever when Anya couldn’t have hers? What gives me the right to a joyful future with Mia when I promised my wife on her fucking deathbed that I would never love anyone else ever again?
What if I stop thinking about her altogether? What happens to her then? What if I forget the feel of her skin against mine? The scent of her hair. The sound of her voice. How she curled up on my chest whenever she was tired. Who will remember all of those things about her if I don’t? If I stop thinking about her every day, she might be lost forever.
“Stay.” She snorts. “Stay?” “Yes.” Her eyes narrow, confusion and anger pulling her beautiful face into a scowl. “Why the hell would I do that?” “Because I need you.” “No.” Shaking her head, she glares at me. “You don’t get to do that. Not now. Not after I begged you to talk to me. Not after those things you said. Two days I’ve waited for you to tell me that you didn’t mean it. For two days, it felt like my heart was being torn apart. Two days, Lorenzo! You could have asked me to stay at any point. Could have told me you needed me. But instead, you ignored me and left me alone when I needed
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“Bullshit!” she bellows, angrier than I’ve ever seen her. “You needed time to wallow in your own misery. Well, I am done watching you shred yourself to pieces with guilt. Done waiting for you to wake up and realize that loving somebody else doesn’t mean you loved her any less.” She swats away the tears dripping down her cheeks. “I’m just done.”
“But I saw the way he looked at you the other night. If you want him, Mia …” “What?” I blink at her. “If you want him, he’s yours. My brother doesn’t fall often but when he does, he falls hard. I’ve only ever seen him look at one other woman the way he looks at you.” She leans down and places a soft kiss on the top of my head. “I have to get home or Max will send out a search party. Ring the desk for anything you need.”
“Kat was right, I’m an asshole. It was only when I knew I’d lost you that I realized I can’t live without you. I’m far from fucking perfect, and I know I’ll make mistakes. I’ll still feel guilty sometimes, but I promise to never shut you out again. I’ll always be honest with you from now on, even if it hurts. I swear. You’ll never be second best, sunshine. I’ll remind you every single fucking day how much I love you.”
“Y-you … you love me?”
“So fucking much. With everything I am. I am yours, Mia. Every part of me, even the broken ones. You’re way too fucking good for me, but if you’ll have me, I will never let you spend another second of your life doubting how much I love you.”
“What if I let you back in, and you …” A shuddering sob forces me to pause, and I shake my head. “I can’t take that risk.”
“A very smart woman once told me that love is always worth the risk.”
“I love you too, Lorenzo Moretti.”
Slipping my hand between her thighs, I slide two fingers through her soaking folds before dipping them into her tight pussy. “You took that spanking so well.” Her smile grows wider. “You remember the first time I fucked you, Mia? When I didn’t make you come? And you thought that I couldn’t do it?” Her throat constricts, a flush creeping across her face at the memory. “And now you’ve spilled your cum all over this house for me. I know your body so well, I can tell exactly when you’re about to lose control. The way your greedy cunt spasms.” I sink my fingers deeper and her muscles ripple around
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“You want to know something about our first time? You felt so fucking good. I lost myself in you. And I’ve been losing myself in you ever since.”
“A part of me knew from that very first time that we’d end up right here. Even when I was pushing you away, some part of me knew we’d wind up like this one day. You wearing my collar.” I caress her throat and her chest heaves. “You being completely mine. Mine to control. Mine to use.”
“Mine to care for. Mine to worship.” I dust my lips over hers, taunting her with the promise of a kiss, then pulling back. “Who do you belong to, Mia?”
“Please, Sir? I need you.” “You have every single part of me, sunshine. All of me. Always.” I sink halfway inside her and groan at the relief of her hot, wet pussy.
“You’re doing so well. You take your punishments like such a good fucking girl.” I sink deeper and she coats me in a rush of slick heat. “So fucking good.”
“You’re so fucking beautiful, Mia.” I run my fingers over her collar and tug it gently, making her gasp. “And you look even more beautiful wearing this.” She flutters her eyelashes. “I love wearing your collar, Sir.”
“You wear it so well. You’re fucking perfect, you know that?” I sink two fingers into her and her back arches off the bed. “I have no idea what I did to deserve you.”
“You have it all wrong, Sir. You might have lost yourself in me, but I found myself in you.”
“That’s right. I want to be able to slide my hand under your dress while we’re walking through the crowd and feel my wet pussy.”
“S-Sir,” I moan loudly, rolling my hips and riding his finger. “What is it, sunshine?” “Please … fuck me.” “A demanding little sub tonight, huh?” He laughs darkly. I drop my hips, sinking deeper onto his finger as he works it inside me. “I always need you, Sir.” “You want me inside you here at this table?”
“Slide onto my cock, Mia. Take me all the way into your sweet cunt. I’m gonna fill your pussy with my cum like I did your pretty throat.”
“Maybe I’ll fill you with something else too, huh?” Molten heat sears in my core, and my breath hitches. I had my coil taken out a few days ago. No more birth control for me. “I would love that, Sir.”
“I’m going to fuck you like this out there for everyone to see next time we come here. Would you like that?”
“You deserve it all, sunshine. I’d hang the moon for you if you asked me to.” I sink my teeth into my lip, staring into his deep brown eyes. “Well, every girl deserves a man who looks at her like he would hang the moon for her.”
