grief is something for which we have little cultural tolerance. We want people to show action, to “move on,” to medicate, treat, or work through it—to put it away, not to wallow or get stuck. The underlying message seems to be that it’s best to prioritize the comfort of those who would rather not bear witness to your pain—people who don’t want to contemplate how someone can be there one day and gone the next, or even that emotions are hard, requiring feeling and processing.
