then eventually a terrible acknowledgment that some line has been undeniably crossed, and fist-at-the-sky, as-God-is-my-witness vows to buckle down and lick this thing for good, to quit for all time, then maybe a few white-knuckled days of initial success, then a slip, then more pledges, clock-watching, baroque self-regulations, repeated slips back into the Substance’s relief after like two days’ abstinence, ghastly hangovers, head-flattening guilt and self-disgust, superstructures of additional self-regulations (e.g. not before 0900h. not on a worknight, only when the moon is waxing, only in
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In all honesty, much of this very section is more resonant and powerful to me than the official AA literature and "Big Book" -- though I'd have to admit IJ is especially potent at getting that first-step work done, but a lot is left to be desired w/r/t long-term sobriety.
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