The Frugal Wizard's Handbook for Surviving Medieval England

by Brandon Sanderson

Oh hell. Was I a cosplayer? And why could I remember that word, but not my own name?

Lol

Tunics and loose, baggy trousers on the men—weren’t they supposed to wear hose? I could swear I’d seen that in a museum.

a color so vibrant, I had trouble believing it was period authentic.

Medieval people were actually quite gaudy and colorful. They loved bright colors, so much so that we’d actually find it ridiculous and clownish. Sanderson should know this. Herpderp

my gut said I was a person who trusted his gut.

It choked me, a black vine wrapped around my lungs.

or attempting to speedrun the conquest of France.

This is hilarious.

Sefawynn got off her rock and looked over my drawings. As before, she found them remarkable. If only my teachers in art school could see me now—and be forced to acknowledge that I was literally the best artist in the entire world.

Lmao. I know the feeling. Take that Prof. Zumwalt!

Have a rap battle with Chaucer!

That’s an easy win since he sucks!

A lifetime of video games had taught me to watch for a tavern or an inn,

One rubbed against my leg, then nipped at me when I tried to pet it. Cats. The same in every dimension.

They weren’t impressed by the ability to kill. Cowed by it, yes. But impressed? No. They were impressed by the ability to live.

Nothing like a therapeutic bout of amnesia to force you to look really hard at your life, eh?

Lol.

Trees, it occurred to me, were like teenagers. They loomed in aggregation.

lmao so true

I pulled to an abrupt stop. It isn’t every day you find one of your best friends standing in the center of an Anglo-Saxon forest, wearing a Robin Hood outfit.

He fell like a bundle of rags, leaking blood and fat out the eye holes.

Yum.