Johann (Vampire's Mate, #4)

by Grae Bryan

He’d gotten distracted feeling out the word surreptitiously under his breath—it was so rarely used in everyday conversation that it was nice to taste it out loud.

Alexei had the momentary, completely bizarre thought that he wanted to steal him. To put the stranger in his pocket and take him back to his apartment, stash him there for the foreseeable future. Just…keep him.

So really, Alexei didn’t need to wear anything super bright to still be the nicest-looking thing in the room.

“Wuthering Heights is better though.” “But it’s so sad,” Jay protested, unbelieving that his friend could prefer such a wretched story to the simple love—imprisoned wife and untimely fire notwithstanding—between Jane Eyre and Mr. Rochester. Soren shrugged. “But everyone is so delightfully mean and unhinged. It’s absolutely divine.”

What was Alexei hoping to accomplish even? Slow seduction via increasingly complicated coffee orders?

“Feed from me. I like the idea of giving you something you need, kotyonok. Let me be of use to you. Please.”

Jay had seen other men’s cocks before, of course—the den he’d been raised in wasn’t exactly puritanical with its nudity standards—but never one that was his to touch. His to play with.

“I think you’re the nicest human I’ve ever met.” Alexei laughed then. A full laugh, easy and smooth. “I’m really, really not. But I like being nice to you.” Jay liked it too.

He did that sometimes, and Alicia always made sure to give him a free coffee drink, winking and warning him not to tell Colin, and then Colin would always make sure to give him a free pastry, frowning and warning him not to tell Alicia.

“What are you doing?” Soren lifted his head from where he’d been peering beneath the tablecloth, arching a golden brow at his mate. “Just looking to see how you could possibly manage to fit such big feet into your mouth at every opportunity.”

“And now your new…regular…also knows, and maybe also about some of us too, and he’s seducing you with his body and his blood and maybe also his baking prowess. Is that right, Jay?” “Right,” Jay agreed, although with a little less certainty this time. He wasn’t so sure it was a seduction going on, not when Jay had agreed so readily. “Just hand stuff so far, but I’m hoping to get to mouth stuff very soon.” “How is this my goddamn life?” Roman muttered, downing the rest of his wine in one swallow.

Really it could have all been so much worse.

How fucking marvelous to realize Alexei had been about as subtle as a hand grenade in his obsession.

Alexei had been in the presence of mobsters since he’d been toddling age; he wasn’t going to be intimidated by six feet something of malnourished Colorado punk.

“Mm. What a beautiful little cupcake you are.” Jay directed his words into the box. At the actual cupcake. And now Alexei was jealous of a baked good.

“I wanted freedom.” Freedom to find you was the thought that went through Alexei’s head. Freedom to choose. To find a person worthy to serve. Worthy to love.

“Anytime, kitten. Literally anytime.” “I read a book once on love languages,” Jay mused, a thoughtful expression on his face. “There were five of them, which doesn’t seem like nearly enough.

Wolfe’s answering smile was mean. Because he could do that, somehow. Smile at someone and make it look mean.

“He can’t love me, Alexei.” Alexei turned to him, his brow furrowed, looking as stern as he ever had before he and Jay had gotten to know each other and his eyes had begun turning soft, just for Jay. “Why not?” Alexei asked harshly. “You’re perfect. Anyone could love you.”

Jay might not have had much experience with love, but he had plenty of experience with its absence. He could tell the difference.

And if Jay was being honest, he had to admit he’d always been a little scared of the mate bond. It had always sounded magical, yes, but he’d also imagined how painful it could be for someone to feel every time their partner was angry at or disappointed in them. How badly it would hurt his feelings to know for sure he was letting his mate down.

Who knew love could feel so good? Who knew it didn’t have to hurt? That you didn’t have to push down parts of yourself just to be accepted?

“Jay’s love language is words of affirmation.” Jay nodded solemnly. “And also all the other ones.”