His heart and his intellect were not separable in this quest. His reason and his moral sensibilities had put a huge obstacle in his path. These objections were manifestations of a rebelliousness against the orthodoxy of his parents, dating to his childhood. He could not believe in God's total sovereignty, the doctrine at the very foundation of Calvinist teaching. Yet he was sure also that he had no hope on his own. What good would it do him if"he gain the whole world, and lose his own soul" (Matthew 16:26)? Earth's pleasures were fleeting and would turn to dust. Even if he thought it was
...more
