Equal Rites (Discworld, #3; Witches, #1)

by Terry Pratchett

is Great A’Tuin, one of the rare astrochelonians from a universe where things are less as they are and more like people imagine them to be,

The storm walked around the hills on legs of lightning, shouting and grumbling.

“If a thing’s worth doing, it’s worth doing badly,” said Granny, fleeing into aphorisms, the last refuge of an adult under siege.

“You’re a bit young for this,” she said, “but as you grow older you’ll find most people don’t set foot outside their own heads much.

she was already learning that if you ignore the rules people will, half the time, quietly rewrite them so that they don’t apply to you.

One reason for the bustle was that over large parts of the continent other people preferred to make money without working at all, and since the Disc had yet to develop a music recording industry they were forced to fall back on older, more traditional forms of banditry.