“I’d be happy if Bill loved me and Alice stopped shooting heroin” may be an accurate statement, but it’s not very useful; there’s no way to force true love from Bill, and ultimately, you can’t control Alice’s addiction. If your needs are being frustrated by another person’s behavior, it’s especially important to ask “Why?” enough times to reach the root of your feelings, where they can be expressed in terms of your needs, not other people’s behavior.
